


Candy

by eridol



Category: Naruto
Genre: Anbu Hatake Kakashi, Bold Reader, Drunken Confessions, Everyone Has Issues, F/M, Hatake Kakashi Has Issues, Hatake Kakashi-centric, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Light Bondage, Masturbation, Oral Sex, Outside Sex, Past Child Abuse, Protective Hatake Kakashi, Smut, Song: Candy (Doja Cat), Songfic, Switch Hatake Kakashi, Switch Reader, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, backstory share, bit of angst, flirtatious reader, fwb to lovers, lots of smut, river sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-22
Updated: 2020-07-22
Packaged: 2021-03-04 20:48:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 32
Words: 53,776
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25452676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eridol/pseuds/eridol
Summary: "You don't need no blood on your hands, no,She's just like candy, she's so sweet,But you know that it ain't real cherry, know that it ain't real cherry,"Kakashi Hatake's middle name is 'obsession', and you're the object of his.
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi/Reader
Comments: 20
Kudos: 236
Collections: Squippy’s Favorite xReader





	1. Chapter 1

At twenty years old, Kakashi Hatake was already jaded, cold, and stone-hearted; someone who many would describe as bitter.

A man who escaped from social situations with the excuse of having to work and a man who worked to avoid anything social, a more childish part of him had been excited when he'd been told that his newest mission would be out of the village and something that he could do mostly by himself.

No Guy, Kurenai, and Asuma to bother him, no other Anbu members to babysit, no anyone but him and his targets.

No one he cared for to worry about. That always made things easier.

His mission was a rather simple one; go to a remote area in The Cloud Village and kidnap the daughter of a Yakuza leader from the large mansion she and her father lived in. Then, he'd interrogate her, get all of the information he could, and use her as bait to lure her father, who would be killed by another Anbu member, as plenty of the masked men and women were supposed to be lurking in the general area and waiting for him.

After that, he could bring the girl back to the village dead or alive dependent on how everything played out.

It was easy and he didn't have to interact with too many people to do it, so it wasn't something he was dreading.

The silver-haired man sat alone in his bedroom, looking out the closed window as heavy rain splattered against it, the drops big and cold, landing against the class before quickly rolling down the length of it. Thunder roared outside, and he had never liked the sound of it all that much, but he figured that he'd be stuck getting used to it considering that he'd be stuck in The Cloud Village for at least a few days. The area he was going to was notorious for its constant storms, and he found himself making a mental note to wear his cloak over his usual attire so he wouldn't end up completely soaked.

Kakashi let out a long, drawn-out sigh. He'd moved the chair from his desk to his window so he could sit in front of it, so now, he was sitting there, resting his forehead against the cool, smooth glass.

His room was a mess; clothes and weapons strewn all across the wooden floor, his Anbu mask hanging off the footboard of his bed. It was weird because, at one point, he'd been so meticulous and clean, but as he spiraled further into darkness, things in his daily life grew progressively worse.

Kushina would've hated how messy he'd allowed his room to become.

Minato-Sensei would've hated how he'd decided to go back into the Anbu full-force.

Rin would've hated how he'd neglected himself.

Obito would've hated how he'd pushed everyone away.

His father would've hated how he was being criticized.

Cold-Blooded Kakashi, Friend-Killer Kakashi, the man who allowed two comrades to die under his watch, the man who was supposed to have guarded Kushina during her pregnancy, the man who had failed himself, his friends, and worst of all; the village, time and time again. Like Kakashi himself, most others in the Anbu were quite nasty, and he heard the whispers and rumors that went around about him- in fact, Tenzou might've been the only one who'd never talked shit.

Kakashi was glad to be getting a small break from them, to say the least.

The silver-haired man sighed, pulling away from the window before standing up and walking over to his bookshelf, grabbing one of his many romance novels and flicking through the pages. He'd read through them all a million times, but he wouldn't mind reading through them a million more. Romance novels were a weird form of comfort that he'd found himself indulging in after Rin had died, reading about the love he'd never had rather soothing.

Then, as he grew older, he'd started reading more mature things. Most teenagers did, he figured. It wasn't weird to enjoy porn, but then it became a small problem when he hit adulthood. He knew there was a lot wrong with him- in the morning and throughout most of the day, he'd be busy working, and then he'd get home, read some sort of raunchy pornographic content, masturbate, and pass out, the time in between those activities spent eating, training, and showering.

All in all, his life was a lonely one, but thinking about that made his chest feel heavy, so he tried his best to ignore it and made his way to his bed, plopping down onto the small mattress with his book still in hand. The Jonin slowly shed what was left of his clothing the best he could with one hand, dark eyes scanning over the pages of the novel he held. First went his forehead protector, and then the light plated armor he wore over his upper-half, his undershirt, and finally, his shoes. He didn't even fully bother with his pants, only moving to lean his back against his headboard and lazily shoving the sweats and boxers down to his knees.

Fuck.

Honestly? He'd stopped focusing on the book, tossing the paper back onto the floor as he spat into his hand and used it to grab the base of his cock, tentatively rubbing himself to full hardness. It had been a few days since he'd had the time, as he'd been preoccupied with missions and whatnot, so he was decently pent up, not really needing any material aside from his imagination.

His mind was racing with lewd thoughts, trying to come up with one that was satisfying enough for him to touch himself to before he finally settled on something that his mind had conjured up on random; a cute girl on his knees in front of him, gagging around his cock... Considerably more desirable than him sitting alone in his empty apartment. Yeah, that sounded nice; maybe she had (h/c) hair, and she'd look up at him with doe (e/c) eyes, soft, (s/c)-hued hands working what she couldn't fit in between her plush lips. Exactly his type. He wasn't sure of how all the mechanics would work since he didn't have any experience, too scared to trust his heart and body to someone else, too untrusting to allow himself to get close enough with others to form a romantic of physical relationship, but also too disgruntled by the thought of one-night-stands to go that route.

Kakashi forced his mind to get back on track as he bit his lip to suppress a moan, tilting his head back and screwing his eyes shut. He was already close, a bead of precum that he used as further lubricant dripping from the head of his swollen cock. It was embarrassing, and he was glad that no one was there to see him- struggling not to moan, legs twitching and flashes of heat running through his body, a thin sheen of cold sweat that made his silvery hair stick to his skin forming on his forehead and along his hairline.

The foggy image of the cute girl Kakashi conjured up became blurrier, but he was desperate and continued on with the fantasy to get himself to the edge- something about her praising him, telling him how handsome he was and how she wanted him to cum on her face and in her mouth.

Shameful, honestly, but he couldn't help it. It's not like anyone would ever find out.

Suddenly, the friction became too much, and his abdomen tightened as the knot of pleasure came undone. With a groan, Kakashi came in his hand, face burning bright red.

A few seconds passed.

The fantasy he'd been having faded from his mind as the sound of the rain pouring outside clouded his mind again.

Movements slow and tired, the silver-haired man reached over to the lonely box of Kleenex that sat on his nightstand, he grabbed a tissue and wiped himself off. Sure, he could've stood to shower, but he was exhausted, and he could do it in the morning. Shifting where he laid, Kakashi kicked his pants and boxers the rest of the way off, threw the cum-stained tissue somewhere across the room, and pulled the blankets on his bed over his naked body before letting out a small huff.

The alarm clock that sat next to the tissues seemed to be taunting him with its blinking red numbers, those of which told him that it was almost one in the morning. He had to be awake at four.

There was no way he was actually going to get any good sleep.

Kakashi rolled his eyes and sat up, reaching into one of the drawers of his nightstand and popping a piece of strawberry candy into his mouth.

It was going to be a long night.


	2. Chapter 2

Kakashi Hatake was unsure of what his first move should be as he sat outside of your mansion, looking through your window. He'd been careful to do surveillance outside of the large compound beforehand, tracking where all of the guards were and making sure that he wouldn't get into any conflicts with them- at least not yet.

The room he was currently looking into was empty despite it appearing to be the main living room (He had assumed that it was the main living room, anyways... There were, like, four of them, and the one he was peering into seemed to be the biggest one in the ridiculously large house. Maybe being a Yakuza leader really was profitable.), and it remained that way for a few minutes. Sighing, the silver-haired man adjusted his mask and his cloak, waiting patiently.

He wasn't sure exactly how he was going to kidnap you, his target, but he knew that it was. He had planned on spending more time getting a feel for the place so he could pull everything off without a hitch, but it seemed that he had done the first part already. All that was left to make a move.

Kakashi would take advantage of a moment of weakness of yours, knock you out cold, write a letter to The Hokage, and then other Anbu would come, use your father's panic over your kidnapping to get him vulnerable, and finally, kill him to finish the mission- at least if everything went according to plan.

Without any warning, the door of the living room slammed open, revealing you and your father. Kakashi had seen pictures of both of you- You were attractive, but your father? Not so much. Kakashi assumed that you took after your mother in terms of appearance, but to his knowledge, she was dead, so clearly nowhere to be seen.

You and your father practically tumbled into the room, seeming to be arguing about something- so loud that even Kakashi, who was sitting outside of the closed window, could hear you yelling.

"No! I don't want to!" Your father raised his hand at your objection, and as soon as you flinched, Kakashi had a pretty good idea of what your relationship with the man was like; abusive, and not good at all. "Dad- Daddy, please!"

"You're acting like a child! You're an adult now, (y/n), and I've already wasted enough time. We should've had this over and done with years ago!"

"Do you really hate me that much...?" You questioned, placing a hand over your chest. You were clearly hurt.

Kakashi debated on moving from his spot in the window, not really wanting to watch this, but also knowing that he couldn't lose sight of you. He never could understand how people treated their children like this- even as adults, even though you couldn't have been far from Kakashi's age, even though you should've been capable and able to defend yourself, even though he'd seen worse things... It was still something that made his blood boil.

"How dare you," Kakashi blinked, unable to help but feel upset when he saw the man slap you across the face, hard enough to leave a bruise and with so much force that you fell to the tile floor. The silver-haired man had to take a deep breath, knowing that both you and your father were both his targets and that he couldn't waste his time and compromise the mission to save you- even if you weren't technically a criminal like your father. "After everything I've put into raising you, you ungrateful little-"

"Leave me alone!" You sobbed, holding your head in your hands and covering your ears as you stood up and took a step back, flinching.

"Fine, but I'm not changing my mind, so be ready."

Kakashi almost had the nerve to wonder what you two had even been arguing in the first place.

You stormed out of the house, seemingly distraught. Your father, however, went in the opposite direction, presumably to wherever his bedroom was. Once you exited through the front door, Kakashi hid in a tree, glad that the area was heavily forested as he watched you walk through the fenced area around your mansion. He tree-hopped, following as you walked past place after place; the garden, the pool, the koi pond, and finally... You stopped in a more secluded area, one without any guards in it.

There was a small fence around it, plenty of trees, and a few logs. The grass was neat and mowed, dewy from the rain that fell. Kakashi could see a stray shuriken on the ground and a few cut marks in the trees, probably from kunai.

A training area, probably somewhere that you used for catharsis, though Kakashi couldn't imagine that you were too terribly strong considering who you were. You'd probably been raised with a slew of guards to protect you, so learning self-defense wouldn't have been necessary, right?

"Glad that's over..." You mumbled, a lazy smirk taking over your face as you raised a hand to your cheek, fingers glowing green... _Does she know Medical Ninjutsu? I thought she was just_ \- He cut himself off, lips parting in shock as your hand fell from your cheek, the bruise that your father had left now gone. You wiped your tears, and Kakashi tilted his head, confused. You looked good as new as you rolled the sleeves of your long-sleeved (f/c) dress up, not seeming to care about the rain, which poured down on you at a rapid pace. What you did next surprised him even more, especially considering that you didn't even have to sign or say the Jutsu's name out loud as you activated whatever it was, both hands glowing a fiery reddish-orange. Fire filled your palms, something like his Chidori or Minato-Sensei's Rasengan in another Chakra nature... You must've been predominantly a fire type. On instinct, he activated the Sharingan in his left eye, continuing to watch you carefully. You held your hand against the tree in front of you and slowly burned the bark of the trunk, dangerously close to the tree Kakashi was hiding in. "Dumb old man. He has no idea what's coming to him, does he? I guess it has paid off to act weak all these years." In an almost loving manner, you placed your hand on the charred tree, gently stroking your thumbs over the black, ashy material. "He'd look so much prettier like this, wouldn't he? Then I wouldn't have to stare at that ugly mug. This... Would be a lot better."

Kakashi wasn't sure what surprised him more; the fact that you were actually useful and knew Ninjutsu, or the fact that you wanted to burn your father's ugly face off, but he could only sit there and gape. That weak act you'd put on in front of your father was most definitely fake, and that made Kakashi think that you must've been planning something. An escape? A coup? A murder? Some combination of the three? He wasn't sure, but whatever you were planning could change his plan, and that wasn't exactly ideal.

"Oh, so she's _crazy_ crazy... " He whispered from his spot in the lush tree, pulling his waterproof cloak further over his head as rain continued to fall from the leaves and onto his protected body. Despite how quiet he'd been, you had heard him, which was made evident by how you quickly turned to face the direction of the tree he was in. He figured he could escape if he had to, or even fight if you decided to go that route, but thankfully, you only shrugged.

"I know you're there, so there's no need to whisper about things that I already know," There was something about you calling him out in the state you were in that he found particularly... Heart-stopping. A feeling he couldn't describe was what he would label it as. His mouth went dry, his eyes were blown wide behind his mask, and his heart was beating so fast that he swore he could feel it against his chest. He was sure that he looked a mess behind the mask. You, however, were majestic; (h/l), (h/c) hair soaked by rainwater, (e/c) eyes narrowed in suspicion, your dress so wet that it stuck to your (s/c) skin, accentuating every dip and curve. You took a step forward, a smirk on your face as your heeled boots clicked against the concrete. "Don't wanna come out? I guess that's alright, too," You gave a dismissive wave, playful and borderline mocking as you turned around, about to walk away. "Have a good night, stranger."

"You too..." He mumbled, unsure of whether or not you could hear him.

Kakashi cursed himself. That would've been the perfect opportunity to kidnap you; the perfect opportunity to complete his mission. But, there he was, watching you walk away, his eyes on your ass.

Careful to be quiet since there were guards everywhere around the mansion that he could catch the eye of, he jumped to another tree, eyes still trained on you.

Finally, he shook his head. He could just target you tomorrow, right?

Right...


	3. Chapter 3

A couple more days passed, and Kakashi realized that he was putting off his mission. Typically, he was very diligent; someone who wanted to get things done as soon as possible, but when it came to kidnapping you, well... He didn't want to do it. He wasn't sure why. He hadn't been given a specific time frame, so he figured that as long as he didn't take ridiculously long.

What bothered him wasn't any sort of deadline, though.

What bothered him was how every time he had an opening, he couldn't bring himself to do it.

Kakashi Hatake had kidnapped plenty of people for missions. He'd killed people just for the sole purpose of protecting The Leaf Village and doing what he was told by the people he trusted. He'd killed hundreds if not more- violently, brutally, not even knowing anything about whether they were innocent or not, so why couldn't he bring himself to kidnap some girl he didn't even know? Kakashi doubted you would even be put through that much. He'd knock you out, bring you back to The Leaf Village for interrogation, and someone else in the Leaf's Anbu forces would kill your father, who you seemed to hate anyways- at least based on how you and him fought constantly. You hadn't actually been connected to any of the crimes that your father had committed, so since you weren't complicit, you'd probably get off scot-free.

So why couldn't he do it?

He'd been lurking around your estate for four days now. He hadn't showered, he smelled like sweat, his hair was greasy, and he'd hardly eaten- only the nonperishables he'd packed in his bag, so he was pretty sure he'd dropped a couple of pounds, and he hadn't really slept, so to make a long story short, he felt fucking disgusting. He just wanted to get this mission done and over with.

Of course, things were never that easy.

Kakashi was sitting in one of the many trees near the koi pond, which was just a short walk from the mansion you lived in, surrounded by carefully trimmed hedges and adorned with a stone path that led to the pond and a bench. He was well-hidden by the leaves in the tree, able to see the front of your house from where he sat on one of the branches.

Thankfully, both you and your father were being loud as all hell, and he had good hearing due to his heightened senses- his mother had been an Inuzuka, not that he knew her, as she'd died when he was younger. It was something that his father hadn't talked about, and after her death, he'd lost contact with the Inuzuka side of the family, so Kakashi had never been close to them and felt like it would be inappropriate to reach out after waiting for so long.

All he'd really gotten from them was his Ninken and an amazing sense of hearing and smell, all of which he used regularly.

The sound of a door slamming shut rang in the back of his mind as he listened in, closing his eyes for a moment so he could focus.

"I don't wanna get married," That was your voice, one Kakashi had grown accustomed to over the past few days. The silver-haired man rather liked the sound of it, as it was the only pleasant one to listen to. Both the voices of your father and the guards that surrounded your compound sounded like nails on a chalkboard to him. Still, it wasn't your voice that caught his attention rather than your words. Marriage? He could only assume that your father was pushing you into something, the thought of which made him agitated for a reason he couldn't quite describe. Arranged marriage wasn't that abnormal, even in The Leaf Village, where plenty of clan marriages were arranged to keep the bloodline strong and whatnot. It wasn't something that would upset him on a normal day, but there he was, shifting uncomfortably where he sat at the mere mention of it. "Why can't you understand that?"

"You're ignorant," That was your father, who Kakashi rolled his eyes at. He was glad that someone was going to kill that guy soon. "You don't know what's best for you, and your opinion doesn't matter. The wedding's tomorrow whether you like it or not!"

"I hate you!"

"Good! You won't have to put up with me after tomorrow anyway, you ungrateful little brat-"

So, the wedding must've been tomorrow... That could affect Kakashi's plan. He'd have to get you out between now and then.

"Leave me alone, Dad!"

"No, I-"

Before he could finish, you stormed out of the house again; something that Kakashi was starting to register as a pattern of yours when you argued with the man. The Jonin saw you walk out the front entrance, your father not even bothering to follow you, and surprisingly, you quickly approached the koi pond.

Kakashi froze, hiding his chakra the best he could as you walked down the stone path and to the bench, sitting down. Thankfully, it seemed like you hadn't noticed the silver-haired man, as you let out a deep sigh and stared down into the pond, watching the fish. You seemed peaceful in that moment, (h/l) (h/c) hair blowing in the wind, (e/c) eyes trained on one of the orange and white fish that swam around in the clear water. A small smile crossed your face, and Kakashi found himself staring for just a little too long.

He definitely wasn't blushing under his mask. It was just hot outside, even if it was windy outside and only fifty degrees Fahrenheit... Yeah.

Of course, he had been wrong about you not noticing- a lot like last time, you spoke out of nowhere again, the distraught that had been in your voice when you'd been talking to your father just minutes before now long gone.

"You're here again, dear stranger?" Kakashi froze at your question, knowing that he couldn't respond. He debated on using a Transportation Jutsu to flicker out of the situation- he'd been watching you closely enough to know that you were skilled in Ninjutsu, though he had no idea where you could've possibly learned it. Self-taught, maybe? He had no idea. Surely you weren't skilled enough to take him, but he didn't want to involve himself in any confrontation that would alert the guards and compromise the mission. "Ah, so you still won't talk to me. Well, if you could give me a bone... I'm going to escape tomorrow, whether you like it or not. I thought I saw an Anbu mask when you were spying on my father and I earlier, so go ahead and toss me a kunai if you'd like to help me out with my surprise exit," Kakashi gulped. _Don't do it, don't do it, don't_ \- Before he could convince himself to act with common sense, the Jonin pulled a kunai from the holder that was strapped to his leg, tossing it in your direction. Unsurprisingly, you caught it between two fingers, the smile on your face growing. "Amazing! It'll be at dawn, then. Be ready."

With that, you slipped the kunai into the pocket of your dress, standing up and taking your leave.

Kakashi had no idea what he'd gotten himself into, but he figured he could at least lie his way out of it and keep from having any serious consequences if he told The Hokage so they could change their plans. Thankfully, he'd brought a trained carrier bird, which was also waiting in the tree a few branches above where he was.

First, Kakashi whistled to signal the bird, which flew to land in front of him on the branch. Next, he reached into the small bag on his back and pulled a pen and a piece of paper to compose a note for Hiruzen.

_"The target seems intent on escaping her house tomorrow, as her father's arranging a marriage for her. I'll follow her, but since she won't be there anyway, I'd urge you to inform the other Anbu not to mess with her since she seems dangerous and probably won't be that valuable to us due to her leaving. The main target will likely be at home panicking over his daughter, so it'd be wise to move the plan along and send someone to kill him tomorrow evening instead of beating around the bush -KH."_

Tying the letter to the bird's leg and watching it fly away, Kakashi sighed, leaning back and staring up at the leaves and branches that kept him covered.

A week ago, if someone would've told Kakashi Hatake that he'd be indirectly disobeying orders just to help some girl he didn't know escape from her abusive Yakuza father when he was supposed to be kidnapping her, he would've scoffed.

But, there he was, doing exactly that for a reason he couldn't quite name...

_What the hell is wrong with me?_


	4. Chapter 4

Kakashi Hatake was dead silent as he looked at his first target that morning. He was at the front of your mansion, and it was dawn, just as you'd told him the day prior. There was a horse-drawn carriage outside with one suited man sitting in the front who Kakashi didn't recognize- probably the driver, who he assumed was there to take you to the wedding, wherever that was. Kakashi was sure he wouldn't find out where it was- not that he really wanted to in the first place.

The driver would have to go first. Kakashi would only knock him out, of course, and the same went for the guards and your father, assuming that you didn't already have that handled, which he was sure you would based on what he'd heard you say about the Yakuza leader over the past five days.

Figuring that he may as well get started while he could, the silver-haired man jumped down from the tree he had been perched in and drew his sword from where it sat on the strap holster on his back beneath his cloak. Not bothering with hesitation, he approached the carriage and hit the driver in the back of his head with the butt of his sword, letting out a small sigh of relief as the man went down without much of a fight and fell unconscious where he sat. 

The guards must've noticed what had happened from inside, as they started to slowly pour out of your house and in from the surrounding areas outside, each approaching him with some sort of weapon. They didn't seem to have any training in Ninjutsu, Taijutsu, or Genjutsu, so the fight wasn't much of a challenge. Kakashi hadn't even been forced to activate his Sharingan or use too much of his Chakra, as it was just a game of avoiding their poorly aimed blows and landing knock-out hits on them until they were all down. There had only been thirty that Kakashi had counted your father having over the past few days during his surveillance, so once he'd defeated that number, he stopped.

All the guards were done with, so assuming that he'd done more than enough to help you, Kakashi moved back to one of the many trees near the front entrance, pulling his fallen hood back over his head and adjusting his Anbu mask. Hopefully, the leaves and branches would keep him hidden from your sight for now.

He wasn't sure exactly why he didn't want you to see him since you were already well aware of his presence, but he pushed the minor confusion to the back of his mind and tried not to question himself too much.

And then, you walked out of the large front doors, completely by yourself. It was dramatic, and though he didn't really know you, from what he'd gathered just watching you, it was exactly what he'd expected. 

You were... _Stunning_ , as much as he hated to think that. You were wearing a huge, old-fashioned wedding dress that was charred around the sleeves, likely from whatever Jutsu(s) you'd used on your father, your hair that had clearly been styled at some point that morning was an utter mess, and you had makeup running down your face, which had a huge smile on it. You walked past the pile of unconscious guards, stepping on a few of them with your heeled feet- not that you seemed to care in the slightest. You looked utterly insane, and as beautiful as Kakashi thought you were in that moment, he was also starting to question his own sanity, because the fact that he was already so interested in you for a reason he couldn't even name was incredibly concerning.

Whatever. He could figure that out later. For now, you seemed distracted as you pulled your huge backpack over your shoulders, so he decided to take that opportunity to leave without you spotting him. 

Kakashi ran through your compound from where he'd been at the entrance by jumping from tree to tree, to the koi pond, to the training area, and finally to the end of the expansive area, pausing and seriously debating on what his next move would be.

Surely you'd be leaving soon, right? If not, the guards would wake up and catch you- Or, just as bad, whoever it was you were arranged to be wedded to that morning would show up or send someone to your home to look for you, which would just ruin everything and make a mess of the entire situation.

"Fuck," He hissed, making the author realize that the only significant dialogue in this chapter was going to be that one word as he looked around, trying to find a good place to hide for a few minutes until everything settled.

Remembering the past two times he'd hidden in a tree while on your land, and remembering how you'd somehow noticed him without any trouble, he decided he'd get a little creative. Thankfully, there was a small river that was surrounded by more trees with a sturdy wooden bridge built over it running along the length of the land near the entry gates where he was standing. It was well-shaded and secluded, and most people didn't look for people hiding underwater. 

So, he walked over to the area, pulling a straw from his bag (which was thankfully waterproof) and putting the end of the plastic utensil into his mouth before crawling into the river, cringing at the feeling of his body being submerged in the ice-cold water. He went all the way in, only allowing the end of the straw that wasn't in his mouth to barely peek over the liquid's surface so he could breathe through it, holding his nose with one hand and struggling to keep his eyes open. The water against the charcoal-hued orbs burned, as his mask wasn't made to be waterproof like most of the other clothes and accessories that were on his person.

_I can't believe I'm doing this shit... But I don't want her to see me again, and if there are any guards I missed, I want to be able to get the drop on them._

He listened carefully for any noises that might've come from outside the river, only to hear footsteps against the cobblestone that made up the ground- likely from you, as those sounded like footsteps from heeled shoes.

Just for a moment, the Jonin allowed himself to peek above the water, instantly noticing you walking past him- probably towards your compound's exit, which wasn't all that far.

Well... Kakashi _had_ said that he'd continue following you in his letter to The Third Hokage. Surely doing as he'd said he would wasn't weird. It was just for the mission, after all.

Taking in a deep breath, Kakashi waited until he was out of your line of sight before emerging from the river and looking in your direction. Your back was facing him as you exited the gates of the compound, appearing relatively carefree despite what you'd just done. Kakashi figured he must've looked quite ridiculous, body drenched in water that made his silvery hair stick to the edges of his mask. He was cold, wet, and dirty, but as much as he would've loved to break into your mansion and take a hot bath or something, he knew that he had more important things to do.

With that, he gathered his resolve, fully stepping out of the river and tossing the used straw behind him before heading your way, completely unaware that was what you'd wanted since the day he'd shown up.


	5. Chapter 5

Kakashi Hatake was, quite frankly, confused. After following you for a few days, you'd stopped at a cabin in The Land Of Fire, unpacking your things and staying there. It seemed like you would remain in that area for a good amount of time if not permanently, and he didn't really question how you knew where it was despite being from The Cloud Village- it was probably something your father had bought you or something your father had bought for himself. Regardless of how the cabin came into your possession, Kakashi, for whatever reason, was relieved that you had a place to stay. 

He'd stayed in the same hotels as you when you'd stopped during your travels, as there was a pretty good distance between The Cloud Village and The Land Of Fire, so it had been nice to catch a shower and sleep in an actual bed every few nights. Your cabin was in a rural area, but on the outskirts of that area outside of the forest said cabin was in, there were a couple of hotels (one of which Kakashi stayed in when he wasn't watching you), probably because it was one of those towns that no one ever went to for any specific reason- only traveled through to get to other more desirable places. It was the perfect town to hide out in, hence why Kakashi assumed you had chosen to go there in the first place.

He'd been watching you at the cabin for the past week. Occasionally, you'd leave and go into town to buy basic necessities. You hadn't packed much in the bag you'd left with, so you only had three or four dresses and then a few casual outfits that you'd been switching between, which led to you doing laundry ridiculously often. You were living in a weird but innocent manner, and nothing particularly nefarious or criminal seemed to be going on, so Kakashi couldn't help but think that you hadn't had anything to do with your father's operations- no, you were just unfortunate enough to be born to the man, but you appeared to be innocent enough.

Innocent in a legal manner, anyways. If Kakashi was being honest, you seemed batshit crazy... Not that he disliked that.

Now, he was sitting on your roof, staring down your chimney. He wasn't watching you, just relaxing there and looking up at the sky, waiting in case you left the house... Surely your father had been killed by now, so there were probably people looking for you. Following you wherever you went was stalkerish and he knew that, but some oddly emotional part of him that he couldn't ignore wanted to make sure that you were safe.

"I know you're around here, dearest stranger," You called out, your voice echoing through the chimney, which made Kakashi jump. You'd caught the Jonin a good three times now (twice in the trees back at your old mansion, and now on the roof of your cabin), so he shouldn't have been surprised, but he was. "So if you're listening, I'm sure you're curious about everything... I'm living off of my father's money. I'm assuming he's already either dead or captured by now, so I doubt anyone's looking for me, but if they are, I've been using a Transformation Jutsu to disguise myself when I go into town to buy things," You described your life in detail, surprisingly nonchalant. Kakashi could see the fireplace turning orange as flames suddenly erupted, likely started by you, so he assumed that you were sitting near it to keep warm. He let out a sigh of relief at that, not really wanting you to come find him on the roof. It was weird; you were well-aware that he was following you, but you hadn't aggressively tried to find him, and you seemed completely unbothered. Even weirder, he was watching you for no good reason. It wasn't about the mission anymore and he knew that. "Even if you aren't listening, I suppose it's nice to be able to talk... Clearly, there's no one else here. This is an old cabin my dad had for when he had to travel here for business."

"Why are you telling me all of this?" Kakashi spoke to you for the first time, loud so you could hear him but calm nonetheless as his silvery voice traveled through the chimney. Suddenly, the fire was put out, and you responded to him.

"Ah, so you _are_ here. I thought I sensed you. I saw you that day when I was leaving," Kakashi gulped at that, eyebrows furrowing together. He pulled the hood of his cloak over his head, adjusting the Anbu mask that rested on his face. It wasn't raining, and it didn't rain often in the area you two were in, either, but the cloak made him feel more... Secure. Like he had an extra layer of protection. As interested in you as he was, the thought of you seeing him made him want to run and hide- not out of any fear that you were dangerous or anything, but... Something else that he couldn't quite pinpoint and that was terrifying to him. "I was handling my Dad, and you were pretty visible through the window, taking care of those guards. Your hood fell for a moment, and I have to say that I was surprised to see grey hair. At first, I thought you were old or something, but your body looks pretty tight and I imagine they don't let people who are that old into the Anbu. I like the grey, actually... Or maybe silver. Yeah, that's more accurate."

"I'm twenty," He grumbled, not really wanting you to think that he was some creepy old man underneath the mask... Admittedly, his actions _were_ a little creepy, and even _he_ could admit that what he was doing was weird as fuck.

"Oh, so you're my age," You called out, tone laced with curiosity and excitement that made a flash of heat run to his cheeks. Why was his heart beating so fast? Why did he like the sound of your voice so much? "I bet you're handsome."

...Were you trying to flirt with him? 

"Debatable."

"You could always come in and show me instead of lurking around wherever I am. You've been stalking me for a couple weeks now."

"Why aren't you unnerved?" He questioned, standing up from where he sat on the roof as he internaly scolded himself for talking to you. "I shouldn't even be talking to you right now."

"I feel like you aren't much of a threat to me."

Kakashi scoffed at that, unsure of how to interpret it. Either you thought that he had no intention of harming you, which was true, or you thought that you could take him in a fight, which he _hoped_ wasn't true. The Jonin liked to think that he was pretty strong, but he didn't know you, and he wasn't one to underestimate his opponent. You seemed like the unpredictable type.

"Your feeling's wrong."

"Wanna come prove it to me?" Kakashi didn't even dignify that with a response, knowing that you both knew what the answer would be; _no_. "That's what I thought."

"Tch."

"Well, I'm going to go make dinner, handsome stranger, but if you ever want to talk or something, door's open. Bye-bye, then."

With that, he heard your footsteps padding away from the fireplace, and he let out a small sigh as he looked up at the blue sky, which was painted with streaks of orange and pink from the oncoming sunset. 

Part of him wanted to leave, to forget about all of this and go back to The Leaf Village, but the other part of him wanted to stay and watch you, and he couldn't fight it. So, he sat back down on the rooftop, reaching into his pocket and pulling a piece of chocolate to unwrap and pop into his mouth.

He'd be there for a while, wouldn't he?


	6. Chapter 6

Kakashi was sitting on a tree branch outside of the front of your cabin, looking up at the clouds in the sky through the leaves that offered him coverage. He briefly wondered how the mission was going for whoever it was who was sent to take care of your father, but speak of the devil and he doth appear- right as the thought about the matter, a carrier pigeon came flying his way, landing next to him on his little branch.

Raising an eyebrow, Kakashi reached for the letter strapped to the bird's leg, unsurprised to see that it was from The Third Hokage. 

_Kakashi,_

_The target has been taken care of, and we've decided that (y/n) (l/n) isn't any threat to us, so your mission's complete. You're free to return and report on anything you found that you think is noteworthy. Thank you._

Kakashi paused, eyebrows furrowing together. It was irrational and he knew it, but the thought of leaving upset him, and he didn't want to do it. Then, he thought about it some more... He couldn't remember taking time off, even when Obito and Rin had died. A break wouldn't be so bad- there was that hotel he'd been staying in that he could rent, he was self-sufficient enough to travel for a short time, and he had a good amount of money saved up. Something told him that he needed to stay at least a little longer, so that was what he was going to do.

The silver-haired man pulled a pen from his pocket and a piece of scratchpaper that he kept on him for exactly this reason, looking at the carrier pigeon, who was staring at him with beady, expectant eyes. Breaking the animal's gaze, Kakashi opened his pen and held the paper against one of the smoother parts of the tree branch he was currently sitting on, using it as a hard surface to write against. 

_That's good to hear, and I don't have anything to report on. I know this is sudden, but I'm afraid I'll be taking some time off to explore the rest of The Land Of Fire. Write me if you need anything. Thank you. -KH_

Sighing, he stopped writing and rolled up the note, tying it to the carrier's leg before watching the bird fly away.

"You there, handsome stranger?" Upon hearing your voice, Kakashi jumped, looking down from his spot, hoping that you couldn't see him through the heavily leafed tree. Surely you could sense him, though, so he supposed that you seeing him with those pretty (e/c) eyes of yours didn't really matter if you could somehow pick up on his Chakra despite his best efforts at hiding it. You had walked out your front door, wearing some unusually casual attire. It was a nice sight, one that made Kakashi think that you might've been taking advantage of not being around your father to actually express your own sense of style. The fancy dresses you had worn before were nice, but definitely old-fashioned, so seeing you in this sweater and shorts was refreshing. You were smiling, too. The more dangerous part of his mind thought that he could get used to that, though he tried his best to ignore it. "You _are_ there! I thought I sensed you somewhere. I'm kinda curious as to why you're still here. It's been a while, so if it's something to do with my father, shouldn't you be done right now? He's not even here with me."

"You're bold to assume that," He called out, cheeks burning red when your gaze flew to the tree he was in. Thankfully, you didn't move towards him.

"Then maybe tell me what's actually going on?" You tilted your head, (h/l) (h/c) locks going in the same direction. Your hair was nice, and again, that dangerous part of his mind was telling him that he wanted to touch it, and again, he ignored the thought. 

Kakashi gulped when you stepped towards the tree, clearly focusing your Chakra in your feet before running up the length of it. The Jonin could've left right there- he really _could_ have, but he fucking froze when you were landing on the branch in front of him, way too close for comfort.

"Um... Hey."

"Hi," You whispered, a giddy smile on your face. You seemed overly-excited at the prospect of finally seeing him, though his face was covered by his Anbu mask and the silvery hair you'd mentioned in your last conversation was covered by the hood of his cloak that he had pulled over his head. Your smile only grew, and having you so close was... Intoxicating. Your perfume was overwhelming in the best way possible, and as you reached out to touch his hand, he realized that he wanted to hold yours. "Do I finally get to see you?"

He wanted to answer _no_ , only, there was something more important to worry about.

The tree branch had been sturdy, but thin, barely enough to support Kakashi's weight. 

The tree branch had been sturdy, but thin, not enough to support both yours _and_ Kakashi's weight.

So, naturally, it broke. 

You were high off the ground, at the top of a huge tree, and though Kakashi was sure that you were fully capable of handling yourself, he found that he was reaching out to catch you in his arms on instinct. Kakashi held you bridal style, close to his solid chest as he concentrated his Chakra in his feet and used it to land safely on the grassy ground beneath you before gently setting you on your feet. 

You looked up at him, eyes wide, that dorky smile still there. 

Suddenly realizing how nervous he was, Kakashi took a step back and spoke. "To answer your question, no, you _don't_ finally get to see me. Peace."

Then, before you could catch him, he quickly used a Transportation Jutsu to flicker out of the area, heart nearly beating out of his chest. 

Why had he even talked to you? He wasn't quite sure. It was a dumb decision, really, but... As he landed somewhere in the forest a few miles from his house, he couldn't deny that he wanted to hear your voice again soon. 


	7. Chapter 7

Kakashi Hatake sighed as he left the bag of expensive coffee on the porch of your cabin, raising an eyebrow and looking through one of the windows, which didn't have curtains over it. You were asleep on the small couch in your living room in a tank top that was a little too tight and shorts that rode up your soft-looking thighs, cuddling a pillow that you held in your arms. You looked peaceful; cute, even. Usually, you seemed vaguely threatening, but you were a lot less intimidating when you were asleep, not giving off the same aura of cocky intimidation that you did when you were awake.

It was a nice night; warm but dry with a soft breeze. It was dark, the only thing lighting up the sky being the stars that dotted it. The silver-haired man glanced at the expensive coffee that he'd just set down and scolded himself for doing this _again_.

It had been out of some weird obligation at first. Kakashi wasn't the compassionate type, but he told himself that seeing a young girl with shitty luck trying to live by herself when she didn't have much to start with was enough to make anyone feel guilty and sympathetic. So, he'd gone back to The Cloud Village and made his way to your old mansion to pack a few bags full of your things; clothes, sentimental-items, and more of your father's old valuables that had been laying around. There hadn't been anyone there, so Kakashi could only assume that the other Anbu had taken care of everything. He'd dropped your old belongings off at your doorstep, and it seemed like you'd used them, which was good.

Then, it escalated. He'd go into town to buy some food or extra clothes to stock the hotel room he was staying in and he'd see the occasional thing that reminded him of you; one of those boxes of fancy chocolates or maple candies that were shaped like the leaves of the maple trees that surrounded your little cabin. For whatever reason, he'd pick up those small things every couple days and leave them at your doorstep, and he couldn't even try to come up with something to excuse that- it was weird, unnecessary, and as much as you seemed to enjoy the gifts, he knew he should stop.

Of course, things only got worse for Kakashi, as it quickly became clear that you couldn't take care of yourself. All of the food you were buying was complete junk- microwavable crap, mostly. You were the type of person who'd assume you knew how to make it and throw the box away, only to forget what to do and pull it back out of the trash a few moments later to reread it. You hardly slept at a decent time, your meal schedule was a mess, you often skipped meals, and Kakashi was sure that the only aspect of your health that you kept up with semi-regularly was your hygiene. The silver-haired man could only assume that your apparent confusion at how to live a normal life was a result of living a spoiled childhood surrounded by guards and servants, so it wasn't necessarily your fault, but... It was painful to watch. Incredibly so. Part of him wanted to be jealous about the fact that you'd grown up taken care of with your father around and alive before remembering that your father, unlike his, had been a complete and utter douchebag. So, he couldn't bring himself to be jealous of you, only taking pity and making a habit of preparing Bentos to leave for you when he thought you might need them.

It had been two and a half weeks since that interaction the two of you'd had through your fireplace, and now he was leaving you candy, perfumes, flowers, homemade meals, and a million other things he thought you'd want or need on a daily basis without even having the guts to talk to you.

Suddenly, he was glad that he'd saved his money and lived so frugally over the years, or he wouldn't have been able to financially afford the bullshit he was currently on.

Logic told him what he should've already known. He had some sort of infatuation, but it was only that, infatuation; an intense but short-lived passion or admiration for someone or something. It was something he could control, and he could end it any time he wanted. It wasn't a feeling that Kakashi had experienced before, but he was good at controlling feelings- or, repressing them at the very least. It wasn't anything like love- he didn't know you well enough for that, and it wasn't even a crush... Just infatuation. 

Honestly, it wasn't anything big, the logical side of himself said. He'd never explored these kinds of emotions, and that was all he was doing. A more emotional side of himself said it was something more, though; it wasn't about the mission, he was making the effort to follow you for no real reason, leaving you gifts, and he was more concerned about your well-being than he was about the well-being of almost anyone else in his life. Then again, that bar wasn't really high, as the only people he was remotely close to were Guy and The Third Hokage. 

Shaking his head, Kakashi sighed and looked around the outside of your cabin, getting away from the windows. You waking up to him watching you sleep through your bedroom window wasn't exactly ideal, and he didn't want to risk it. You already knew that he was following you and he knew that, but he'd rather you not physically see him in the act if he could avoid it. 

Everything seemed fine, and you weren't doing anything of importance. There was no reason for him to stay there any longer, so he ran a hand and secured his Anbu mask over his face, pulling his cloak over his head before turning away and walking through the forest so he could get back to his hotel, completely unaware of just how soon he'd end up coming into contact with you regardless of his attempts to avoid you.


	8. Chapter 8

Kakashi Hatake had been trying to justify his obsession with following you for weeks now to no avail. It was weird and creepy, and he knew it, but as he heard the conversation that the two strange men were having outside of your cabin right now, he was suddenly glad that he was there.

"Yeah, man..." One of them had a cloth mask on, similar to Kakashi's own. He was tall, with brown hair and green eyes. He had a Leaf Village headband, but there was a slash through the metal of it, signaling that he was rogue. "She lives here all by herself and has a ton of valuable shit just laying around. We could mark the house, come by while she's asleep sometime soon, tie her up and do whatever we want, steal everything in the house."

Kakashi rolled his eyes at that, smirking. The thought of these two guys trying to tie you up like you were some helpless, distressed maiden was laughable- something told Kakashi that you could take them, and if you could sense Anbu hanging around with ease, you'd probably already noticed these losers lurking outside of your house as well. Marking houses wasn't unnecessarily common- in rural areas like this where the houses were secluded or in ghettos where the houses were unprotected and the crime rates were high, robbers would mark the side of the houses they wanted to break into with spray paint as a reminder of which ones were high-security and which ones weren't.

"Sounds like a plan to me," The other man, who had darker hair and matching black eyes spoke, shaking up a can of purple spraypaint that he had in his hand. The outside of your cabin was made out of a nice, light wood that Kakashi had thought was refreshing and nice. Having it dyed purple would just look ugly. "Maybe we could even get a little bit of fun in, especially if she doesn't have a dude around. Can't believe this girl's just living here without anyone to protect her."

Again, Kakashi was sure that you could handle yourself just fine, but he was already there and the implications that these two were making were starting to irritate him. So, he made his presence known, jumping out from the tree he had been sitting in and landing on his feet in between the two men. They looked horrified, eyes wide and movements suddenly shaky, which made Kakashi think that they weren't experienced. 

"I'm pretty sure she can protect herself, but for your information, there _is_ a dude around," Kakashi smirked underneath his mask when the two men turned to fully face him, clearly shocked by his sudden appearance.

"What the hell? I haven't seen you around here at all over the past few days!"

Kakashi raised his eyebrows at that- he hadn't really seen them around either, but he figured that they must've only been coming around when he was staying at the hotel and when you were asleep. You hadn't bothered to take care of them, obviously. 

"Well, I've been here. Isn't it a little late to be crawling around these parts?" He questioned, tilting his head. He had expected a fight to come out of this, sure, but he was a little surprised when the man with the dark hair hit him in the back without any warning. It stung for whatever reason, and Kakashi scolded himself for not wearing his armor over the clothes that he had on underneath his cloak.

Not bothering to say anything else, Kakashi jumped into the air and onto the roof, able to feel his hood fall for just a moment before adjusting it and forming the hand seals that he needed to for the Jutsu he was about to use.

_Horse, serpent, ram, monkey, boar, horse, tiger..._

The man hadn't even moved from their spots, still standing there with shaky legs and staring up at Kakashi. They appeared to be adults, but Kakashi knew that at _most_ they were Chunins if not Genins before they'd gone rogue because it seemed like they didn't have any combat experience whatsoever.

"Firestyle; Fireball Jutsu!"

Allowing the Chakra that he'd gathered in his chest and lungs to pour out through his mouth, Kakashi watched the fireballs steadily stream out, approaching the men at a rapid pace. It was obvious that they hadn't been expecting it, as they barely dodged, both heading in the same direction and getting burned regardless, the brunette on the left side of his body and the one with the darker hair on part of his face. Kakashi was sure that he might've actually singed their hair...

How pathetic.

Surely you had noticed that there was something going on outside of your house by now, right?

The one with brown hair and lighter eyes formed the hand seals to perform some sort of water Jutsu, which he used to put out the small grass-fire that had started from the fireballs landing on the ground- a careless mistake, as he definitely should've been focusing on Kakashi, who was rapidly approaching them.

The men were clearly distracted by their failed attempts to dodge the fireballs, so Kakashi took advantage of that to move behind them, draw his sword from the holder on his back, and knock them out with the butt of it.

They fell to the ground, and Kakashi was relieved to see that the fire hadn't spread, only burning some of your grass before being put out.

Knowing that both men were unconscious and that it wasn't a long walk back to the village, Kakashi did the hand signs necessary before kneeling and pressing a hand against the grass, sighing in relief when all eight of his Ninken appeared right in front of him.

Pakkun looked somewhat concerned, but Kakashi averted his gaze, gesturing to the two men he'd just burned and knocked out before speaking.

"You guys, get these two back to The Leaf Village to be arrested. I'm pretty sure they're rogue... Don't let them get away."

Pakkun nodded, and with that, Bull had both of the rogue ninjas' shirt collars between his teeth, and the Ninken were gone in a cloud of smoke.

Everything was settled.

That's when he realized that the punch one of the men had managed to land on him was not, in fact, a punch. 

There was blood pouring out of it.

It was a stab wound.

Thankfully, it wasn't in any vital areas, but he found himself sitting down and leaning back against the outer wall of your house to rest for a few moments.

He was tired, and he could feel himself getting weaker. The thought of getting back to the hotel and stitching up the skin that had been stabbed crossed his mind, but when he tried to stand, he found that he couldn't- only attempting before his shaky legs failed and caused him to fall on the grass beneath his feet. Groaning, he rolled over to lay on his stomach and slipped a hand up the back of his shirt in a desperate attempt to put pressure on the wound to get it to stop bleeding. Of course, that didn't work, and as luck would have it, he heard more footsteps.

Weakly looking up to see you moving to kneel in front of him, Kakashi groaned. He didn't want you to see him like this. You were as gorgeous as ever, (h/c) hair pinned back and out of your face, bright (e/c) eyes staring down at him. You reached forward, and as much as he would've loved to run away or even stop you, he couldn't even muster the strength to move. You pushed the hood of his cloak down, and then took his Anbu mask off and set it to the side. Next was the other mask that he had on, which you quickly pulled down until it hung loosely around his neck.

You smirked, looking at the wound on his back before blinking in what looked like surprise.

"My my, aren't you a cute one? I _was_ right about that. The fact that you wear that mask is such a shame! I should probably heal you up though, huh? Poor thing... C'mon, handsome stranger."

With that, Kakashi was lifted, one of your arms slipped under his armpit to keep him up, your free hand taking his to wrap it over your shoulder so you had a good hold on him; a fireman's carry. It was dangerous to let you take him, but he was still losing strength as blood continued to seep out of the wound in his back. 

Thankfully, you quickly pulled him into your cabin, gently setting him down on the ground and holding him so that he'd stay upright. The Jonin wanted to get up and leave, to tell you to fuck off, but your gentle hands were lifting his shirt over his head and resting on the area where he'd been stabbed, soothing and warm as you began to heal him. It was dangerous to trust anyone and he knew it, but realizing that he was safe for now, the adrenaline that had been pumping through his veins was almost instantly replaced by exhaustion, and he was succumbing to it. 

Kakashi couldn't even muster the strength to open his eyes, so he settled for leaning into your touch and taking in a deep breath.

Maybe a small nap wouldn't hurt if it was just you watching over him...


	9. Chapter 9

When Kakashi woke up a few hours later, he was surprised to find that he was tied up, his arms kept behind his back with some incredibly scratchy rope. His back didn't hurt anymore, so he could only assume that you had healed it.

Wait... _You_.

Struggling against his binds, Kakashi allowed his eyes to snap open, only to find that he was sitting in your bedroom. The walls were the same light wood that the outside of your house was, and the plush rug of the floor he was currently sitting on was a light rose-hue. You had a mirror hanging on your bedroom door and a Victorian-looking painting on your wall, as well as a wooden dresser drawer in one of the corners. The bedroom was nice and cozy, that vibe further accentuated by the lamp that sat on your nightstand, which bathed the room in a soft, warm glow.

There were more important things to focus on than the aesthetic of your bedroom, though. 

Firstly, his mask was gone, and he didn't have a shirt, cloak, or shoes on- he assumed you'd taken them off to heal him.

Secondly, he was still tied up.

Thirdly, you were standing right in front of him, a sly smirk taking over your face as you realized that he was awake.

"It took long enough to get you all to myself, handsome stranger," You chuckled, and suddenly, Kakashi felt his face burn red. Part of him questioned why he was even blushing in the first place, while the other part of him wished he had his mask to cover it. "What? Nothing to say?"

"Why have you tied me up?" He snapped, pulling more at the ropes that kept him restrained. Oddly enough, you'd bound his arms behind his back, but his hands were free. 

"Thanking me for healing your injuries would've worked, too, but I guess if you're that curious, I just want to get to know the man who's been following me for oh-so-long. I didn't even get to look at your face when I saw you. If I didn't tie you up, you'd run away again."

That was true, so he couldn't deny it, but he was still frustrated at his current circumstances.

Maybe being tied up by you in a different context wouldn't be so bad, but _this_ was bad.

"Tch."

"You were after daddy dearest, weren't you? I'm surprised you didn't take the opportunity to kill him after I escaped. I made the perfect opening for you and you wasted it," You practically mocked him, a mischievous glint in your eyes as you crossed your arms over your chest. "But I guess your intentions changed, didn't they? You followed me instead, and now you've been here for so long, leaving all of those sweet gifts on my doorstep for me."

"Of course this is the thanks I get for making sure your house doesn't get robbed..." Kakashi grumbled before concentrating his Chakra to his hands, doing the hand signs the best he could despite being somewhat inhibited. Feeling lightning sparking around his palms and fingertips, he used it to slice through the rope and free himself before jumping to his feet and activating his Chidori, holding it threateningly. Though he didn't have any real intention of using it on you, he wanted to try to make an escape, and if he could get you to back down, he could do that. "You know I'm not some Genin, right? It's going to take more than some flimsy rope to restrain me."

"Oh, I know that. I just wanted to throw you off," You didn't even hesitate, pausing for a moment before a ball of scorching fire filled your dominant hand. You held it up threateningly, and Kakashi watched it circle around in your palm; mesmerizing, a highly concentrated Jutsu that appeared to be something you'd created. It was spinning in your hand, almost comparable to a fire-nature version of his former sensei's Rasengan. "What, you think I'm intimidated by that thing?" You laughed, tilting your head and gesturing to his Chidori. "It looks more like a sparkler than an actual Jutsu."

"Is that so?" Kakashi could only bring himself to sigh, allowing his Chidori to die down as you did the same with... Well, whatever the hell it was that you were using. The room grew darker again, the only light coming from your lamp. He used the moment of silence to take a couple of long strides towards you before placing a firm hand against the center of your chest above where the swell of your bosom started, roughly pushing you against the wall and leaning forward to whisper in your ear, lips brushing against the lobe. "Then how about this? Intimidating enough for you, sweetheart?" He teased, pushing a knee against the wall between your legs to keep you trapped there. "It's awfully bold of a girl like you to tie me up in her house like this."

"What can I say?" You smiled, placing a hand on his bare chest, trailing your fingers up and down the pale skin. Kakashi froze as he took in the feeling of those digits trailing down, brushing against his mid-section and going low enough to rest on the small patch of silver hair right below his navel. He'd never been touched like that, both because he knew that most people didn't want anything to do with him and because, in most cases, even if they did want him, he'd never let them. Yet there you were, acting all coy and exploring his body with your soft, (s/c) hands like it was some sort of map. "I've always been the bold type."

"I can tell," He spat, and it was immediately followed by a tense silence.

It was painful, the air so thick that he could barely bring himself to swallow. The Jonin moved both hands to rest on the wall on either side of your head, pulling away from your ear- just far enough to look at you, his charcoal eyes melting into your (e/c) ones. 

Without any warning, you were leaning in, gently pressing your lips against his.

Kakashi's eyes fell shut, but then snapped back open. You were fucking _kissing him_. He hadn't kissed anyone, really- aside from Guy that one time, but that wasn't something he really talked about. He wasn't experienced, but it seemed like you were, and as hot as that was, it was also terrifying. What if he embarrassed himself?

Throwing his inhibitions away, Kakashi tried to do everything he'd read about in all of those erotica books; moving his hands down to rest on your lower back before allowing them to drift to your ass and running his tongue over your bottom lip. You tossed a leg around his waist, and taking that as a sign, the silver-haired man used his grip on your backside to lift you up and into him. You went along with it, locking both of your legs around his midsection and throwing your arms around his neck.

You were warm, you smelled _so_ sweet, and he wanted nothing more than to get rid of the tension that had been building from the second he'd arrived at your old mansion to watch you on that fateful day.

The room was suddenly much hotter as Kakashi walked across the room to your bed and sat on the mattress, pulling you onto his lap. You adjusted your position, moving so that your knees were on either side of his hips with your legs beneath them, your ass sat on his muscular upper-thighs, your clothed crotch resting against the tent that was straining against his boxers and sweatpants.

"What do you want me to do to you?" You asked, tilting your head in that winsome way you always did as you carded your nimble fingers through his silver hair. Kakashi allowed it, enjoying the feeling of someone actually being so affectionate towards him. The desperate, touch-starved part of him thought that he could just sit there for the rest of his life if he could just relish in you playing with his feathery locks.

"You sure about this? You don't know what you're getting into with me," He warned, but didn't object when you went in for the kill, shoving his pants and boxers down past his hips and throwing them onto your bedroom floor. "I'm dangerous."

"You're just my type, then. Blow me away."

"I... Haven't done this before," He confessed, attempting to swallow his anxieties as he looked up at you, only to see that you appeared incredibly surprised. Should he not have said that? "I can't even believe I'm here right now. I shouldn't..." Shaky hands landed on your hips as you leaned over to the nightstand, grabbing a condom and tearing the wrapper open with your teeth before slipping it over his hard length. "Fuck it."

"Let me drive, baby," You whispered in Kakashi's ear before pulling away completely and standing up. The silver-haired man watched in awe as you slipped off the tank-top you'd been wearing, that of which didn't leave much to the imagination. You hadn't had a bra on underneath, so once the (f/c) material was pulled off of your body, your perfect-looking breasts were revealed for his eyes to rake in. He found himself activating his Sharingan without another thought, praying that it would allow him to remember every second of this. "God, you have such pretty eyes... That must be why you cover them up, huh? Can't have everyone you run into falling in love with you." 

Kakashi blushed even deeper at that, running a hand through his hair as you dropped your shorts and panties, stepping out of them and crawling back onto him. He moved back a bit so he could be all the way on the bed instead of just sitting on the bed, his back leaning against the headboard.

You were fervent and enthusiastic in your demeanor, heated and dominant and all the things he'd never known he'd wanted before the moment you were crawling back on top of him and sitting in his lap, soothingly running a hand through his hair and pressing a kiss to the top of his head as you took his cock in one hand and pushed yourself onto it. Kakashi moaned and tossed his head back so hard that it slammed against the headboard- not that he cared about the rush of pain that shot through the back of his head, overwhelmed due to the sensation that came with his girth stretching your tight, slick walls and being swallowed by the scorching heat of your body.

Your lips were pressed against his, and _God_ , the way you kissed him made him feel _wanted_ for the first time in years.

You, the girl he'd been having wet dreams _(that he'd never admit to having)_ about for weeks, were riding him with no restraint, and Kakashi thought that it might've been the most gorgeous thing he'd ever seen. Almost instantly, he found himself struggling, constantly switching between focusing on not cumming too soon and immersing himself in the pleasure that came with your velvety heat clenching around his length like you were trying to milk him dry. 

It was intoxicating, and Kakashi wasn't sure if it was just because it was his first time or if it was because it was you railing him like there was no tomorrow, but regardless of whichever it was, he knew that he wanted to make you feel good, too. You lifted your hips, almost letting him slip all the way out of your pussy before sinking back down. Unable to control himself, Kakashi reciprocated and bucked his hips up in return, snapping all the way into your pliant body in a way that made you moan out loud.

His mind was racing with all the things he'd read and seen throughout his lifetime, scouring for reference; something to tell him what the hell it was he should be doing right now aside from desperately thrusting his hips up in time with your languid bounces.

"Damn it," Kakashi groaned and moved a hand up, resting it on your thigh before using his thumb to part your gossamer petals and searching for your clit and gently massaging the sensitive bundle of nerves between two fingers. The silver-haired man had initially feared that you would lose interest rather quickly and be made bored by his inexperience, but you seemed to be enjoying his touch, which was unsure but steady and skilled regardless; an oxymoron in itself. "Like this, right?"

"Y-Yes!" You moaned, threading your fingers through his hair and burying your face in the top of it, taking a deep breath. Continuing your motions, you bounced up and down his cock, the movement becoming more and more fluid with every bounce. You were even wetter than you had been when you'd started, and though the condom kept him from being able to feel it directly, the slapping noises that filled the room and the slickness occasionally hitting his toned thighs were both unmistakable. 

It was perfect- the warm lighting that brought out all of your best features, the tears of pleasure that were building up in your lust-glazed eyes, the way you dragged yourself up and pushed yourself back down, so warm and wet and _everything he'd ever wanted,_ so fucking perfect; all _you_. Without warning, you gasped, your hands flying to his shoulders, (f/c) painted nails digging into the taut, pale skin and leaving angry red marks there- not that he minded. You suddenly got even tighter, constricting around him as a sob-like moan fell from in between your lips. Kakashi realized that you were cumming and pushed his thumb into your clit to put pressure on the erogenous zone, and that was what seemed to send you over the edge; body tensing up, your legs offering cute little twitches and shaky gasps leaving your mouth.

The mere feeling of it had Kakashi finishing as well, using his free hand to slap over his mouth to keep himself from making any noises as the pressure that had been building up in his body snapped, which had him painting the inside of the condom white with his seed.

As soon as it had started, it was over, and you were lifting yourself off of him and standing on shaky legs. You reached down, taking the condom off of Kakashi's length and tying it off before dropping it in the trashcan that was between his bed and his nightstand. 

Fuck.

Kakashi began to get his senses back, and with those senses came the one that he hadn't used for the past hour or so; common sense. He had just slept with a girl who he didn't really know, who was also the previous target of a kidnapping mission. Why was he so weak for you, and what the hell was he doing? He shouldn't have even stayed and watched over you after his mission was over, let alone allowed things to go this far.

In the time that he'd scolded himself, you'd gone to the bathroom and come back, seemingly freshened up but still completely nude- it seemed you weren't embarrassed, which made sense; you were gorgeous, after all.

He paused as you crawled into the bed.

"I should leave-"

You smiled, shaking your head and cutting him off.

"Stay."

He _really_ should've left.

Did he leave, though?

No, of course not. He did exactly what you'd told him to. 

He stayed.


	10. Chapter 10

The next morning, Kakashi woke up feeling heavy and tired, like he could sleep for another ten hours and might break if he moved another muscle. Still, when he opened his eyes to see that you were there, he was suddenly snapped awake.

You were both laying on your sides, facing each other and sharing the blankets on your bed. Your soft legs were brushing against his, the warmth that was radiating off of you keeping him from succumbing to the cold temperature of your cabin.

You were still asleep, which Kakashi was thankful for, as he needed a bit of time to recover from the shock that came as memories from the night before flooded back into his mind.

Not even realizing what he was doing, Kakashi reached forward and rested a hand on your cheek, gentle brushing his thumb against your (s/c) skin and taking in how it felt against his. You looked a lot more relaxed when you were asleep- less teasing, less dangerous, more... Peaceful. Your eyelashes were fluttering against your cheeks, soft breaths slipping from in between those barely parted lips, which were kiss bruised from everything that had happened the night prior. You were holding the covers close to your chest, just high enough to cover the swell of your breasts, but low enough to reveal your collarbones. He could stare at you like that forever.

And then, your eyes opened, and you were smirking at him. _Fuck_.

"What are you looking at me like that for?" The second you spoke, Kakashi jerked his hand back, charcoal-hued eyes going wide. "I'm not gonna make you breakfast if that's what you're expecting."

Kakashi felt his face burn crimson as he sat up in your bed, leaning his back against the headboard and loosely crossing his arms as he glared at you and tried to come up with some sort of clever retort.

"I'm pretty sure you're incapable of that, so of course not. If anyone's making breakfast, it's probably me since you can't even take care of yourself properly and make anything but microwavable shit," The slighted remark didn't go past you, of course, though you didn't take offense to it as Kakashi had hoped. You only raised your eyebrows and smirked, almost like you were challenging him or something. "But who the hell _are_ you? You're not even a ninja, but..." Moving one of his hands behind him, he ran his nimble fingers over the area on his back where he'd been stabbed, only to feel that the wound was completely gone, nowhere to be felt. His mind began to race as he looked back at you. "You would've had to use medical Ninjutsu to heal me this well, and you caught that kunai perfectly a while ago, and that time you used Chakra to climb up that tree, and that fire Jutsu as well..."

"I don't feel obligated to tell you everything, but if you don't already know, the name's (y/n) (l/n)," You spoke, tilting your head and tucking a strand of (h/c) hair behind your ear. Then, you winked at him, and as annoyed with your secretiveness as Kakashi was, he remained just as charmed by you as he had been the night before. "I like to consider myself a bit of a mystery, y'know."

"Mystery? That's an understatement," The Jonin scoffed, running a hand through his silvery locks and looking off to the side.

"Well, what about you?" Without any warning whatsoever, you moved to sprawl yourself across Kakashi's lap, your breasts brushing against his thighs and your elbows resting on the mattress as you looked up at him with a coquettish grin. "Leaf ninja? I can tell by the headband you were wearing when I picked you up and took your mask off. The outfit, too... Are you really an Anbu like I thought? Can't believe my dad's that big of a deal."

Not even thinking about it, Kakashi reached down to play with your hair, trying to log the texture in his memory in case he never got to do this with you again. Thinking about it, he wasn't sure if you wanted a one night stand, a relationship, or whatever else, and he was honestly too afraid to ask... How bothersome. 

"He _was_ that big of a deal."

"Oh, who killed him?" You questioned, surprisingly casual as you tossed the covers off of yourself and stood up from the bed. Kakashi missed your warmth but didn't dare complain, just listening to you talk. "I know it wasn't you because you started following me, like, immediately after I left," You were completely nude until you walked over to your dresser, grabbing a large t-shirt, which you slipped over your body. It went to your upper thigh, just barely covering your more sensitive areas. "Good riddance."

"Someone else on my squad probably killed him, not that I know exactly who..." The silver-haired man answered, though he immediately regretted it. He shouldn't have been giving important mission details to one of the targets- even if the mission was done and over with. "I shouldn't even be telling you this. You could be a honeypot for all I know. And why don't you seem to care?"

"What, you think I liked the guy or something? He was hardly around, and when he was, he was an asshole. Again, good riddance," You laughed, and your words made Kakashi wonder if you had a screw loose or something, but he scolded himself for even thinking like that. Sure, he couldn't understand how someone could be so apathetic about the death of their own father, but his own father had been a kind and compassionate man who'd taken his own life, while _your_ father... Well, _your_ father was an abusive criminal who deserved what he'd had coming to him. "Even if I were upset... I don't owe you my grief, handsome stranger."

"Stop calling me that," He scolded, taking the opportunity to grab his boxers and pants to slip back on under the blanket and away from your prying eyes when you turned around to grab a pair of shorts to wear. Despite the things you two had done last night, he was still bashful.

"Then what's your name?" You asked, walking over and sitting down on the bed. Now at least half-dressed, Kakashi tossed the covers off of himself, still blushing as you crawled into his lap.

"I shouldn't even be telling you this."

"But you are, aren't you?" You asked, tone teasing as you rested your hands on his face and leaned in, raising your eyebrows.

"Kakashi," He relented, having to suppress a purr of satisfaction when you ran through your hands through his hair. "Kakashi Hatake."

"So, Kakashi Hatake," You started, moving one hand from his hair and resting it on his shoulder. "I have things to do, but I'm assuming you're gonna follow me like you always do."

"Again, you don't seem to care..." Kakashi mumbled.

The fact that you'd known about him following you this entire time really was embarrassing to be reminded of.

"Oh, not at all. You would've tried to kill me by now if that was your plan, and this the most attention I've ever gotten."

"You have a fair point. I don't plan on killing you. I'm not even working for The Leaf Village right now."

Not even thinking about it, Kakashi moved his hands to slip up and underneath your t-shirt, gently massaging your hips with his thumbs.

"Is that so?" You inquired, seemingly amused by that for whatever reason.

"After the most recent mission, I informed the Hokage that I'd be taking some time off to explore The Land Of Fire. I haven't had a good day off since I was... Maybe six? So this is a first."

"They really work you Leaf Ninjas like dogs, huh? I wouldn't mind having a cute one like you around, but something tells me that you don't have fun that often," You withdrew from him completely, standing up with a grin that he swore would've given men with less self-control heart-attacks. "Why don't I teach you? C'mon," You grabbed his hand without hesitation, pulling him up from the bed, seemingly unbothered by the fact that he was only half-dressed as you leaned in to whisper in his ear. "We're going to town tonight."


	11. Chapter 11

A few days had passed, and Kakashi found himself at your doorstep, the dinner he'd bought for both of you in one hand as he used the other hand to gently knock against the wood of your front door. 

After you'd spent an entire day together in one of the larger towns in the area, with you dragging him around some festival and making him party and gamble with you, he'd realized one thing that was beginning to drive him insane. 

You were sweet, but intoxicating- almost _poisonous_ , thoughts of you plagued the entirety of his mind and wouldn't leave him alone through the course of the following days. So, there he was, at your house again. 

Maybe that had been your plan when you'd dragged him in and tied him up that night. Maybe you'd planned on letting him have just a taste of what you had to offer to get him addicted so he'd keep coming back like he was now.

A minute or two passed, and you still hadn't answered the door. You were home and he could sense your Chakra there, but he figured that you might've been occupied and decided to turn away and leave. Of course, right when he turned his back to the door was when you decided to answer it, quickly unlocking it and pulling it open with a small chuckle. Kakashi turned around to face you, already somewhat exasperated.

"Hello, handsome stranger," You greeted, earning a roll of his eyes in response.

"Don't call me that," He scolded, gently pushing past you and walking into the house. You shut the door behind both of you, turning around and leaning your back against it as you playfully batted your eyelashes at him.

"Mr. Anbu?"

"Try again."

"Kakashi?"

"God, I don't even know why I'm here again," Kakashi grumbled as you approached him, wrapping your arms around his neck and running a hand through his hair in that way you did that made him feel so weak.

"Because I'm a ton of fun, dear," You teased, though he only rolled his eyes again.

"More like a ton of batshit crazy."

"How sweet of you," You gave a small chuckle, clearly using a sarcastic tone as you withdrew from him and continued. "I know you can't hate me too much. You're still leaving such nice things on my porch."

That much was true. Over the past few days, he had been leaving things on your porch, not changing that habit. It was embarrassing, but what could he say? 

"I can't argue that."

"Especially not considering that you've brought me dinner," You took the bag of food out of his hands and walked into the kitchen with him following you like a lost puppy, waiting for you to make the next move. "But we can worry about that later." 

With that, you set the bag down on your kitchen counter and leaned back against the marble material, holding a hand up and pulling your finger in a 'come hither' motion. Kakashi did just that, walking over to you and nearly freezing upon feeling you wrapping your arms around his neck, leaning in to press gentle kisses against his jaw. Your lips were a lot softer than his and a little waxy due to the chapstick you were wearing, and before he knew it, his mind was turning to mush.

"You're dangerous," The Jonin muttered, placing his hands on your hips. You only shrugged before reaching up and running a hand through his hair.

"You love it, though."

"Since you insist on skipping dinner for now," Kakashi started, licking his lips as he used his hold on you to lift you up and set you down on the kitchen counter, standing between your legs as he rested his hands on your knees and spread them apart. "I might as well get a meal of my own, right?"

"That reminds me, I don't really have any condoms around. We kinda used the last one I had when-" You started to explain, but Kakashi cut you off.

"Not a problem," Kakashi slid the cloth of his mask down his face, allowing it to hang loosely around his neck as he slid his hands up the length of your thighs. "We don't have to do _that_." 

Already tired of your shorts, Kakashi slid them down and let them fall to the floor before spreading your legs even wider and sneaking his digits up to rub your folds through the cotton panties you were wearing. The Jonin held the underwear to the side with one hand, using the other to run his thumb up and down your slit, pressing down and gently massaging teasing circles into your clit when he finally felt the bundle of nerves. He wasn't quite sure of what he was doing, but his actions were close enough to what he'd read in the books Jiraiya had written, and your (e/c) eyes were already glazed with lust as you tilted your head back and allowed your legs to twitch just a bit at the stimulation- best of all, you were already so wet, though Kakashi didn't know if that was from what he was currently doing or because you'd been anticipating it from the moment he arrived on your doorstep. 

Kakashi couldn't help but notice how you gasped as he finally moved his fingers from in between your thighs and replaced them with his tongue instead, both hands flying to land on the top of your thighs and pry them apart to give him room so he could eat you out. He wasn't sure what he'd expected, and maybe it was just because it was _you_ , who he'd been obsessed with for so long, but you tasted so fucking _good_ \- sweet, salty, wet, and _God_ he thought he could feel the arousal rolling off of you in waves as you angled your hips to give him better access and moaned.

"Kakashi...!"

You calling out his name like that, the usual teasing edge that your voice had knocked out of you for once, only spurred him on. The silver-haired man went all the way in, licking and sucking at your clit like his life depended on it, letting go of your thighs so you could squeeze his head between them as he dragged his tongue up the length of your slit again and back to the sensitive bud, trying to send you into overdrive.

Your thighs around his head only grew tighter, like you were trying to trap him there, the pressure so hard that it made his ears ring- not that he minded. Despite their strength, your thighs were trembling as he used a free hand to slip between your legs, pushing two fingers into your drenched pussy and thrusting them in and out, curling them in the way he'd read about in all of those erotica novels as he did.

Your hands were threading his hair, grabbing and tangling, pulling and yanking in a way that had him moaning into your heat _because apparently he had a bit of a thing for having his hair pulled that he was only just now discovering_. The vibrations that went through you at him moaning against the already stimulated area seemed to make you finish as your cunt tightened around his nimble fingers, another rush of your arousal seeping out as you weakly called out his name and let out a choked gasp. He continued his motions for another minute or so to allow you to ride the wave of pleasure before pulling back and looking up at you questioningly to make sure that he'd done okay as he carefully withdrew his fingers from you.

Without any warning whatsoever, your arms were tossed around Kakashi's neck and you were jumping on top of him.

Of course, Kakashi caught you, but you threw him off balance, causing him to topple over onto the floor with you on top of him. One arm was around your waist, pulling you to his chest to keep you secure so you wouldn't fall to the floor, while the other arm was behind him, his elbow nearly slamming into the tile. Thankfully, no damage was done, so he let out a sigh of relief as he let go of you and relaxed, resting most of his weight on his elbows and peering down at your cute face.

"I could've hit my head there. Be careful or you're gonna knock me out," The silver-haired man scolded rather half-heartedly as he rolled his eyes, watching you move down the length of his body and sit on your knees between his legs, mischievous hands teasing the waistband of his pants. Unabashedly, you pushed his pants down to his knees and reached into the front of his boxers to pull his cock out at the same time you pushed your own panties back into place. "Then again, I'm sure you'd like tha- _Oh_ , fuck..." Without warning, you'd leaned down, one of your hands resting on Kakashi's thigh so you could fully balance yourself while the other was holding the base of his cock to keep it steady as you pressed gentle kisses against the head and teasingly licked up the bead of pre-cum that had gathered at the broad head. It was only then that he realized just how excited he'd gotten from eating you out, as he was already sensitive and aching to cum.

Your soft, sweet lips parted to take him in, causing him to clench his fists as his length was the wet walls of your mouth surrounded his length like hot, welcoming velvet, your tongue swirling around the sensitive skin as you barely scraped it with your teeth in a dangerous way that had him struggling not to moan. You moved the hand that had been on his thigh to grasp his balls, fondling them between your soft fingers. 

It wasn't long before he was chasing an orgasm; you sucking him off, deft tongue rolling over his dick like a lollipop, one hand still on his balls while the other was fervently working what you couldn't fit into your mouth.

Somehow, it went from being not enough to being too much, and the coil of heat that had built up in his abdomen and length was unwinding, warmth flooding through him as he came in your mouth with a groan. Your mouth wasn't painted white for long, as you swallowed around him just seconds later, practically drinking everything he'd given you with a wild sort of enthusiasm that just turned him on even more despite him having finished less than a minute ago. 

You finally lifted yourself off of him, his cock slipping out of your mouth. Kakashi shivered at the sudden cold, but he didn't complain as you slinked up the length of his body, laying across him and resting your chin on his chest. You were both still on the floor, laying there rather aimlessly, and if he were with anyone else, he would've been embarrassed, but something about you made him feel at ease at that moment. 

"So... How about that dinner? And then another round, of course."

Silently, Kakashi sat up on his elbows and nodded his head, struggling to suppress a smile when he saw you grinning up at him. 

"Sure."


	12. Chapter 12

Kakashi Hatake wasn't quite sure how to describe the relationship between you and him. Another month had passed, and you two had fallen into a routine of sorts; he'd lurk around your place, you'd tease him, and then you'd have what he'd started to think of as casual sex. He still left gifts on your doorstep and made a lot of your food, and he stayed at your house about half the time. Over the course of that time, you two had become somewhat friendly and established a dynamic, though it was rather confusing for Kakashi most of the time.

It was a late night, and the two of you were sitting in your bed, backs against the headboard as you talked. You'd shared some dinner that Kakashi had made a few hours before, and now the two of you shared conversation.

In the middle of a pause, you spoke up, reaching over and tugging his mask down- something he'd gotten used to you doing. Kakashi only sighed, allowing the elastic garment to hang loosely around his neck as he crossed his arms over his chest and shot you a questioning look.

"So, what's the mask for, Kakashi?"

"What do you mean?" He asked, raising his eyebrows. 

"I mean, why do you wear it? You're not unattractive, so there's nothing to be insecure about."

"That's a stupid reason to wear a mask," Kakashi scoffed, shaking his head. He didn't consider himself particularly unattractive, but even if he did, that definitely wasn't why he wore his mask. "Of course that's not it."

"Then what is it?"

"I've worn it since I was a child. You know I'm in the Anbu..." Kakashi reminded you of a fact that he thought you were already aware of, looking off to the side. He had a million reasons for his mask- his appearance not really contributing to it nowadays, but he wasn't ready to open up about all of those details to you. "It's reasonable to hide my face considering the things I've done. Isn't that obvious?"

"Not necessarily," You answered, shrugging. "My father killed a ton of people and never wore a mask."

"He was also a scumbag from my understanding."

"Fair point," You paused, moving to sit behind him without much warning. Your hands were on his bare back, legs on either side of him as you massaged his shoulders. He looked back at you, eyebrows slightly raised. Your hands were gentle but firm, working all of the knots and tension out of him with each second that passed. He couldn't help leaning into your touch, even when you stopped massaging, only raking your nails up and down his back in a soft manner. It didn't hurt- quite the opposite, really, the light scratching sensation raising goosebumps on his pale skin. You stopped for a moment, and he immediately began to miss the feeling as the thought of _Oh God, I'm so touch-starved_ briefly crossed his mind. "What's that look for?"

"Do that again- the thing with your nails, I mean," Kakashi specified, and you did what he'd requested, running your nails down the skin of his back again. "...No one else has touched me like that before- like, at all. It's nice."

"No one's ever given you a massage _or_ scratched your back?" You questioned, seeming like you were genuinely shocked by that. "Your life must be a pretty lonely one," Kakashi had to hold back a wince- your comment wasn't too far off, so he couldn't really object. "I'm glad I'm here now."

"You don't know what you're getting yourself into," Kakashi let out a dark chuckle, shaking his head as you rested your head on his shoulder and wrapped your arms around his waist from behind. He glanced back at you again, quirking an eyebrow. The feeling of your soft skin against his was nice and comforting, and he had to come up with something to change the subject or distract you quickly before you noticed how easily you could make him melt. "What, you think you can fix all that?"

"I'd like to," You answered, surprisingly honest as you moved from behind him to sit in front of him instead, right between his spread legs on the mattress, your hands resting on his shoulders and thumbs massaging circles into the pale, taut skin as you continued. "Call it payback for helping me out all that time ago. I don't know if I would've been able to handle those guards by myself."

"Something tells me you would've been able to," The silver-haired man muttered, resting his hands on yours as he thought back to the day you'd left that mansion- it felt like so long ago now despite it only having been a couple of months. "You looked hot in that wedding dress, you know."

"What, would you like to see me in a wedding dress someday?" You teased, tilting your head and taking his hands in yours. The more logical side of Kakashi knew that you were joking- the two of you hardly knew each other, but still, you looked beautiful in that moment with the warm glow of your lamp bringing out all of the rich hues in your (s/c) skin and (e/c) eyes, and your words had his breath catching in his throat. "I'm just kidding, heh... I know I looked pretty crazy that day. You must have a type."

"I'm afraid I might," Kakashi admitted, averting his gaze as you giggled and leaned forward to press a kiss against the hollow area of his throat, trailing down to the juncture between his neck and shoulder before landing on his collarbones, smooth lips teasing and torturous but tender and generous as they left more kisses and hickeys across his upper body. The sudden attention being lavished on him was enough to send a wave of arousal through his body, of which went straight to his cock and had him slowly hardening in his pants. He placed his hands on your hips, watching as you took the cloth of his previously abandoned mask off from where it had been hanging loosely around his neck, tossing it across the room along with his forehead protector. "Fuck..." Kakashi trailed off, using his hands on your hips to lift you up and lay you down on your back before crawling on top of you. He was kneeling between your legs, hands slipping down to your thighs to spread them apart as he leaned in to nip at your ear. "Mind if I take control?"

Your body relaxed, and you submitted to his request, licking your lips with a nod. Off came the clothes, neither of you really wanting to waste time with foreplay, Kakashi's pants and boxers landing on the floor and your t-shirt and panties discarded somewhere on the end of the bed.

"I went to the doctor recently," You explained, batting your eyelashes up at him. He wondered what that had to do with anything until you finished the sentence. "I've been on birth control for a few weeks now, so if you don't want to use a condom, you don't have to. If you do want to, though, they're in the nightstand like always." 

"I'm good if you are," The Jonin responded, embarrassed at the way his tone conveyed his clear excitement despite how he'd tried to restrain it. He stared down at you for a moment, watching the way your chest rose and fell with each ragged breath that you took. Then, he paused, balancing his weight on one hand just long enough to use his spare one to tease one of your pert nipples, attending to the other bud with his mouth and swirling his tongue around the sensitive skin. Your hands flew, fingers threading through his hair and gripping onto it so you could cradle his head close to your chest. "Fuck."

Kakashi hooked his hands on the undersides of your knees and gripped the soft (s/c) skin, pushing until your thighs were against your chest and stomach and he could use your body for leverage to fuck into you. You attempted to move your legs to rub them together for some sort of friction, some sort of relief, but Kakashi's grip tightened and he kept you in place, giving you a stern look. You were strong and flexible, probably enough to wrestle him to his back and take control, but you didn't, acquiescing to his silent demand and looking at him with lust-glazed (e/c) eyes. 

Wanting to tease you, Kakashi smirked and leaned down, kissing your forehead and moving further and further down to leave more pecks with his cherry lips, a more possessive side of him wanting to stain your entire neck and chest with wine-hued hickeys and bite marks that you'd look at in the mirror the next morning.

You finally grew frustrated enough to grab him by the shoulders and pull him further in, your grip surprisingly strong. The head of his cock brushed against your soaked entrance and he couldn't take it anymore despite being the one who was initially planning on teasing you, so he allowed himself to tip forward and push his length into you, letting out a small groan as he listened to the way you panted in his ear from the sudden stretch. Despite neither of you being dressed, the room felt scorching hot, and Kakashi gently rubbed his thumbs over the side of your knees as a way of distracting himself while you adjusted to the solid pressure of his dick being squeezed by your inner walls. 

"Kakashi," You whined, reaching up, _reaching out to him_ , though he wasn't quite sure what you wanted. Hoping that he had the right idea, Kakashi took a deep breath and let go of your knees, resting one arm on the bed to brace himself, the new angle causing his cock to grind deeper into the heat of your pussy in a way that made you let out another whine. Unbelievably turned on and probably just as desperate as you were, the silver-haired man used his spare arm to slip under your back so he could yank your body up and into his. "Harder!"

The pleasure was overflowing as he thrust into you, the tight sleeve of your cunt barely allowing him to pull out and greedily sucking him back in every time he pushed his hips forward again. The feeling was indescribable, something he could get drunk on and drown in, and all of that combined with how your chest was pressed against his and how he could feel your heartbeat through the sweaty skin was just too much for him to be able to think straight. 

Your hands flew down onto the bed, fingers twisting into the bedsheets. Kakashi's nose was brushing against yours, your breaths mingling and scents mixing, his worn-off cologne nearly consumed by the sweet, candy-like aroma that always tickled his nostrils when you were around and lingered on him for hours after he went back to his hotel room post-fuck. The Jonin picked up the pace of his hips, your pussy tightening around his length and his pelvis brushing against your folds and making contact with your sensitive clit with every thrust. 

Your hands moved again, now on either side of his neck to hold his head in place so you could go uninterrupted when you started pressing sloppy kisses against everywhere you could reach- his nose, his cheeks, his jaw, his forehead, the top of his hair, his chin, his neck, and finally, his lips, which you devoured with fervor. On instinct, his body snapped forward in a rough manner, driving deeper into you. Your already half-lidded eyes fluttered shut at the particularly hard thrust, pretty lashes briefly brushing against your (s/c) cheeks.

You were about to cum and he could feel it as your arms were shakily wrapped around his neck, fingers drifting down to claw at the area on his back just between his shoulder blades with your (f/c) painted nails. Wanting to get you there, Kakashi started fucking you in earnest in a manner that he prayed would leave your body sore and tired in the best way possible- the way that would lead to him having to carry you to the bath because your legs were too shaky to walk on, the way that would have you clinging to him and falling asleep on his chest a few minutes after you both finished, the way that would have you silent and struggling to catch your breath for a few minutes. His hips moved faster, and _faster_ , _and faster_ because _God_ , he wanted to be the one to tear you apart and put you back together.

"(y/n)..." Kakashi mumbled, the sound of him saying your name muffled by the crook between your neck and shoulder, which he had buried his face into. The wet, lewd sound of wet skin slapping skin was prominent in the room and as debauched as it was, he damn near moaned at the sight when he pulled out and looked down to see his hard cock glistening with the slick of your juices. 

Kakashi Hatake wasn't normally one to lose his composure, but when you wrapped your legs around his waist and pushed your hips up into him with that filthy, loud moan of his name, he began to move at a speed that he'd once thought humanly impossible- one that would surely leave bruises on the inside of your plush thighs from how hard his thrusts were. 

"I'm so close," Your words were jumbled and uncharacteristically high-pitched, but he could understand some of what you said well enough. "Cum inside me- Fuck, _please_!" 

You practically sobbed, full-body shakes running through you as you finished without any further warning, your wet walls constricting around him. Unable to help himself, Kakashi caved and collapsed on top of you, satisfied with how your legs around his waist pulled his weight further on top of you. Your orgasm seemed to trigger his, and he was cumming inside you with a weak groan, hot seed spilling out in steady spurts and painting your womb a creamy white. The only sound that filled the room for a few seconds was his own heartbeat drumming in his ears and the attempts you were both making to catch your breaths.

There wasn't much of a pause, as he instantly came to his senses and moved, frantic to try and change the subject so you wouldn't comment on just how fervent he'd been throughout the course of that- not that his internal panic showed, of course. He'd spent too many years learning how to mask his feelings to slip up in front of you.

What had come over him anyways? Looking down at you, Kakashi realized that maybe he'd gone too far, because your neck was more purple and red than it was (s/c) from all of the marking he'd done, and bruises in the shape of his hands and fingers were beginning to form on where he'd been holding your hips and the backs of your knees. You hadn't been much nicer, which was evident by the stinging sensation in between his shoulder blades from where you'd sunk your nails into his pale skin and forming hickeys near his chest, neck, and jawline that felt more like injuries than love marks. 

"We should probably take a shower or something, but... Ugh, I don't wanna get up." He grumbled, pulling out and flopping back on the bed as the adrenaline wore off, exhaustion weighing his muscles down. "My back fucking hurts. You don't need anything, do you? You okay?" 

Sighing, the silver-haired man sat up and placed a hand on his shoulder, gentle rubbing where it felt like he'd pulled something yet again. You sat up as well, warm and soft and everything he was craving when you moved to be behind him again, your hands resting on his back.

"I'm fine, but how about another massage? It'll be even better this time."

It was weird; weird to let someone else touch him like this, weird to be vulnerable and relaxed around another person, weird to trust you, as dangerous and unpredictable as you were for him, but your hands were massaging his back again and he couldn't say no.

 _Weird_ , but not _bad_. A good kind of weird... A weird that he could get used to if it was with you. 


	13. Chapter 13

Kakashi Hatake was unsure of exactly what his relationship with you was. It was confusing. Were you friends with benefits? Were you even friends? He knew that it wasn't appropriate to label it with anything past that because while he wasn't sure what his feelings were, he knew that yours weren't anything more than casual.

So, he was conflicted as he sat across from you in the surprisingly large bathtub that was in your restroom, your legs resting on top of his as you both leaned back and soaked in the hot water.

Kakashi had tuned out for a few moments, consumed by his internal questions about what the hell your relationship was and where it was going. You two had been talking about past relationships, which was what got him thinking about the topic in the first place. He had none to talk about, the closest thing being an experimental phase he'd gone through with Guy that had ended before anything could become of it, or maybe the crush that Rin had on him for so many years, but neither of those counted. Not wanting to delve into his past, he'd let you carry the conversation for the most part.

"I don't do that whole romance thing often. I'm more of a casual fling kinda girl myself," You explained away what Kakashi had already suspected, giving a dismissive wave of your hand. "And when I do get into anything with someone, it sure as hell isn't with a man my dad approved of like that guy he was wanting to marry me off to. I'm more into people he wouldn't approve of," You moved, spreading his legs and sitting on your knees in between them, booping his nose with the tip of your pointer finger. The water splashed against the side of the tub at the sudden movement, but he didn't bring it up, only able to sit there silently. "You know, like you."

"Am I really that bad, (y/n)?" Kakashi asked, breathless. The water was hot, and so were you, your lips stained red from the wine that the two of you had been binging throughout the night. The Jonin had no idea how you were always so relaxed about everything, your body completely nude and so close to his, _so_ warm. Then again, you were beautiful. He supposed you didn't have things to be ashamed of like he did.

"Not necessarily," Your hands were resting on his face, and he moved to lay his arms across the edges of the bathtub, helpless under your melting gaze as you continued to talk. "Just a little roguish- mysterious... Dangerous," Your thumbs stroked over the skin that covered his cheekbones as it began to burn red with a heavy blush. "He wouldn't have approved of you at all, especially since you're a Leaf ninja. That doesn't mean you're bad, though. You leave me sweets on my doorstep and make me dinner just about every night."

"Oh, shut it," Kakashi rolled his eyes, leaning his head back as you pressed kisses against his face, starting at his forehead, and then his nose, trailing down to his cheeks and jaw.

"Mr. Anbu's gone soft for little old me!" _Soft_ was a more than ironic choice of verbiage, as the attention you were currently paying to him was making him hard despite the fact that you hadn't even done anything inherently sexual- just verbally teased him a bit and kissed his face, but he was sure that just about anything you did at this point was enough to make him want you in one way or another. "What's next? You gonna fall in love?"

"(y/n)," Kakashi spat in a scolding manner, averting his eyes from you and staring at the side of the porcelain tub as if it was the most interesting thing in the world. He wasn't in love with you, but his feelings were definitely _growing_ \- whatever those feelings were, and they had _him growing_ increasingly concerned.

How long was he going to stick around? When was he going to go back to the village? Why had he stayed this long in the first place? Surely he couldn't stay forever. He should've already left by now.

"Ah, you know I'm just kidding..." You laughed, and for whatever reason, your response made him struggle to suppress the frown that threatened to take over.

"What are we?" He finally managed to spit the words out, his heart beating so fast that the feeling resonated in his throat and rushed through his ears, but you only blinked down at him and laughed.

"I know what we have is just a little fling for you," You seemed like you were trying to reassure him, though your words did the exact opposite, even if they were spoken in that casually reassuring tone he'd come to be so attracted to. "Don't get so worked up, Kakashi."

"You're ridiculous sometimes," Kakashi sighed, sitting up a little more and resting his hands on your hips, rubbing them up and down your sides in a sensual manner. He wasn't sure why his heart had dropped at your answer when he'd expected that answer all along, but he ignored it and looked up at you. "Not that I don't like it... You've got this charm to you that I've grown fond of, you little freak."

"Wow, did Kakashi-tsundere-Hatake actually just compliment me?" You questioned, tone teasing as you feigned shock and placed a hand over your chest. "I feel honored."

"Whatever," Kakashi rolled his eyes at you for what must've been the millionth time that night and furrowed his eyebrows, leaning in for just a moment to suck a hickey into your neck. You leaned forward to sit on his lap, your wet heat sliding against his hardening length. His breath hitched, though he tried not to let it show, only tightening his grip on your sides before wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you in closer to his chest. "Maybe I did compliment you. So what?"

"Heh," You only chuckled, thumb brushing over his cheekbone again. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say you like me. Why don't we go to the bedroom?" To his disappointment, you got off of him and stood up, stepping out of the tub, and he pulled the drain plug before doing the same. With that, he picked you up and tossed you over his shoulder, walking out of the bathroom with a small frown.

His mind was muddled by his arousal for the most part, but the areas of it that were clear couldn't help but think one thing as he tossed you onto the bed and crawled on top of you.

_What the two of you had wasn't just a little fling to him after all, was it?_


	14. Chapter 14

It was the next day when Kakashi was sitting at the rocking chair near your bedroom window, looking out to see that it was raining heavily. You were sitting in his lap, legs tossed across the arm of the chair and an arm around his neck as you looked out the window as well. The two of you had just finished the breakfast he'd made, and though he'd planned on going back to his hotel, the weather was bad and you didn't want him walking in the rain.

Suddenly, a bird flew to land on the edge of the windowsill. Kakashi recognized it as one of the village's carrier pigeons, which probably had a letter for him. 

"Hey, look at that! What a cute bird- Wonder if he has a nest or something around here..." You muttered, standing up from where you'd been on the Jonin's lap and crossing your arms. "Think he'll stay there if I go get bread to feed him with?"

"No, don't," Kakashi stopped, holding his hand up before opening the window just enough to let the bird fly in and onto his lap. Sighing, he took off the cloak he'd been wearing over his usual attire and dried off the poor bird as gently as he could before dropping the now-wet garment to the floor and taking the letter that was strapped to the pigeon's leg. "He's a carrier pigeon from my village, not a wild bird. Bread is bad for them anyway. It doesn't have proper nutrients for them and it's hard to digest since their bodies weren't made for it. If you're going to feed him anything, get him a few nuts from that canister you have in the pantry or dried fruit if you have any."

You left the room, probably to go get something for the bird to eat even though he probably didn't need it. Kakashi opened the letter and read over it, easily able to tell that it was from The Third Hokage even though the ink was smeared by the rain.

_Kakashi,_

_I know this is sudden, but it would be appreciated if you could come to my office to have a private meeting. I don't have any specific time or day, just sometime in the next week or so. I'll be available. See you soon._

By the time he was finished reading, you'd returned to the room with a handful of ravens. You sat on the floor by Kakashi's feet and handfed the bird, who was still sitting peacefully on Kakashi's knee.

"What's the letter about?" You asked, looking up from your spot on the floor. The bird flew back to the windowsill, and you rested your head against Kakashi's knee, staring at the pigeon as you waited for an answer.

"It's from The Third Hokage. He wants to see me soon," Kakashi explained, and then opened the window and turned to the carrier. "Be sure he knows that I read it." 

With that, the bird flew out the open window, and Kakashi shut it back, setting the letter down in the sill.

"The Hokage, huh? You must be pretty special if he's wanting to see you," You commented, standing up and pacing around the room. Pacing was something that made Kakashi nervous when other people did it since it was a nervous habit of his own, but you did it a lot, and he couldn't ever bring himself to be too annoyed by it- at least not annoyed enough to comment on it. 

"Not really," That wasn't true. He was special, though it wasn't for the best reasons. He was the student of the dead Fourth Hokage, two of his best friends died under his watch, his father was a legendary war hero turned ostracized war failure who'd ultimately committed suicide, he was in the Anbu. He was special alright, but you were from a different village and he didn't want your opinion of him to turn negative, so he'd shelter you from all the darker aspects of his life for as long as he could. You knew he was in the Anbu, sure, but that apparently only gave him a mysterious and appealing edge because without the details, you didn't understand how dangerous he really was. And Kakashi wanted to keep it that way. "I'm just like everyone else there. Even if I weren't, he treats us all about the same."

"Really?"

"He's a kind man," Kakashi started, looking off to the side. "He can appreciate the individual qualities that people have, but he doesn't play favorites. He's pretty close to everyone in the village, which is why he's had such a successful reign."

"Ah... Sounds like The Leaf Village isn't half bad," You stopped pacing, coming to stand behind Kakashi so you could loosely wrap your arms around his neck and rest your chin on top of his head. "The Raikage's a complete jackass... Very militant if I do say so myself. He means well, but he's willing to ignore serious problems in the more civilian areas of the village to prioritize everything going on in the ninja world."

"Yeah, that's what Minato-Sensei said."

Ah. He hadn't meant to let that slip. 

"Minato-Sensei?"

"My former teacher," Kakashi explained, choosing to leave out the Fourth Hokage part. You were a civilian from a different village and Minato's reign had been relatively short, so you probably didn't know him by name. If anything, you'd know him as The Yellow Flash, or the man who'd killed over a thousand people by himself during the war- not Minato Namikaze, and certainly not Minato-Sensei. "He was active during the war and ended up fighting the current Raikage a few different times, enough times to get to know him. Though his wording was a lot nicer than yours, it matches up."

"Your teacher fought that guy and lived?" 

"Yeah..." Kakashi trailed off, sighing as he leaned back in the chair. "Well, he lived through those fights, at the very least." 

"So The Third Hokage wants to meet you. You know why?"

"No idea. He didn't specify, but I'll probably head back to my hotel room, pack a bag, and leave tonight. It's not that long of a trip, so expect to see me again in a few days- a week at the longest, assuming that I have to stay there a couple of extra days to attend to anything that might've come up while I was gone."

"Alright, be sure to have fun!" Your tone was encouraging, but Kakashi could only roll his eyes. Meetings with The Third Hokage either meant a new mission, more death, or him getting lectured over tea, and he wasn't sure which one it was going to be this time. As much as he loved Hiruzen, meetings with him weren't ever fun. 

"Right... You still have enough leftovers for dinner, right?" Kakashi asked, knowing that you weren't all that great at cooking for yourself, which had probably been made worse by the fact that he'd started opting to do it for you most of the time instead of just teaching you how. "You might have to fend for yourself for a little while."

"Trust me, I'll survive," You scoffed, pulling away from him and crossing your arms. "I will miss your cooking, though, so hurry up and get back, handsome."

"Heh," Kakashi chuckled before standing up, pressing a kiss against your forehead and ruffling your hair in an uncharacteristically soft display of affection. "I'll go ahead and get out of your hair. See you later."


	15. Chapter 15

Kakashi Hatake was painfully nervous as he sat across from The Third Hokage, both men with their own cup of tea and a shogi board between them. Hiruzen had called him for a meeting rather suddenly, not saying what he needed. Kakashi had initially assumed that it was going to be for a mission or something, but when he'd shown up, the elderly man had told him to sit down and stay for a cup of tea and a game of shogi.

They were about halfway through the game, Kakashi not really trying. He was never one for shogi, and his mind was distracted with thoughts of you. He hadn't even been gone for that long, but he missed you regardless and couldn't wait to get back to your cabin. That being said, though, it had been a few months since this whole thing had started with you and he was confused as to where it would go. Surely he couldn't stay with you forever, switching between that cabin and the local hotel that was slowly draining his wallet- as lonely and distant as he was, there were people in The Leaf Village that he cared about, and it _was_ his home. He didn't really want to stay away from you or the village for too long, but he knew that it would be selfish to ask for both.

Kakashi shook his head upon realizing that it had been too long since he'd moved, so he moved his promoted lance forward one space- he had no real goal with doing that, no real plan, but it was a move, and he hoped it would make The Hokage's stare turn a little less curious.

"So..." Hiruzen started, picking up his knight and taking the lance Kakashi had just moved with it. Kakashi blinked, only realizing just then that his lance had been within the knight's attack range. "It's unlike you to suddenly take time off to spend in the rural Land Of Fire, Kakashi. What over there caught your attention?"

"The woman you initially sent me to kidnap," Kakashi answered with a sigh, looking off to the side as he took a drink of his hot tea and pushed his bishop a few spaces diagonal and to the right. As much as he would've loved to lie, he couldn't bring himself to. Hiruzen almost always saw right through him anyway, so there was no point in trying. "I found her, and... She caught my attention."

"A girlfriend?" The Third Hokage questioned, a bright smile on his face. He seemed distracted by Kakashi's answer as he rested his hands in his lap, his grin only growing. "Congratulations. It's about time you found someone to settle down with-"

"It's not like that..." Kakashi grumbled, staring down at the wooden table they were currently sitting at. "And I'm only twenty."

"Oh, Kakashi," Hiruzen laughed, giving a dismissive wave of his hand before crossing his arms and shaking his head. "I know you think that no one can tell what you're thinking because your face is hidden, but that one eye of yours is so expressive."

Feeling attacked, Kakashi blinked and further averted his gaze. It was true that he wore his mask for a million reasons, one of those being to hide his feelings when he couldn't hold back his more revealing and vulnerable expressions. It made sense that someone who had known him since he was born would be able to see through his facade, but the thought still made his stomach churn and face burn red. Rather than address it properly, Kakashi crossed his arms and tried to eighty-six the comment from his superior.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"That's up to your interpretation, Kakashi," Hiruzen, as vague as ever, picked his tea up from the table and wrapped the fingers of both hands around the cup, probably to warm his skin. As the man grew older, he became colder a lot easier, which was something Kakashi noticed, as The Hokage seemed to wear more layers and have the heat in the building progressively higher with every year that passed.

"Why have you called me here?" Kakashi tilted his head, ready to get to the point of this so he could leave. As much as he loved The Third Hokage, if this whole meeting was just for him to sit there for a few hours and get called out for his reclusive and repressive tendencies while getting his ass kicked at a game of shogi, he didn't want to waste his time enduring it. 

"Oh, just to catch up. You seem tense," Setting his tea down, Hiruzen reached across the table to rest his hand on Kakashi's shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze. Kakashi allowed himself to relax just a bit, the tension that was in his body slowly leaving. There were times that Hiruzen reminded him of his own father, warm and comforting but still strong and firm. Kakashi was hit by the fact that as much as he'd grown attached to you, he missed The Leaf Village, too. "You know, if you decide that you want to, you can bring the girl here. I won't associate her with her father's actions. She didn't even commit any crimes, really... Just a victim of circumstance."

"You're underestimating her," Kakashi argued, eyes falling shut. He remembered everything he'd seen from you, how you'd fought your father who was a grown man, how you'd sensed him with ease despite him being an Anbu member, how you'd seen his Chidori and fearlessly formed a counter Jutsu in the palm of your hand. Kakashi wasn't sure if you were so confident because you knew that you had the hold over him that you did or if it was because you knew that you could take him in a fight without any problem. As cute as you were, Kakashi got the vibe that you could and _would_ destroy someone if you really wanted to. "She's dangerous when she wants to be."

"I was simply saying that you can," Hiruzen clarified, offering a languid shrug before moving his king to the side. "You don't have to bring her here if you don't believe it's safe. Just know that the option's open."

"We aren't like that anyway," Kakashi felt the need to clarify as well, a little awkward now that he was aware of the fact that Hiruzen thought you and him were dating or something. Maybe he should've just made up some lie about thinking you were an active threat to The Leaf Village, but then again, that might've caused more trouble than it was worth.

"Then what _are_ you two like?"

"...I'd be lying if I said I knew for sure," Sighing, Kakashi paused. It was time to change the subject before he gave away more of his personal life than he was honestly willing to. "Let's talk about something else. How's your son?"

Luckily for Kakashi, Hiruzen started to happily ramble about the current whereabouts of Asuma and Konohamaru, and he was free from the subject of you... At least for now.


	16. Chapter 16

The outside of your cabin was pretty. Lush, green, and calm, with all sorts of wild life and relatively nice weather. Kakashi would've spent more time admiring it or maybe even reading a book, but you were faster and much more skilled than the silver-haired man had thought you would be.

He had only been back from The Hidden Leaf Village for a few hours, but you'd somehow managed to lure him outside with your ever-present charm to train. He respected you too much to go easy on you, so of course he tried, and he'd known you were strong before this, but you were keeping up with him incredibly well and it was somewhat shocking- the only person he sparred with regularly who could keep up with him was Guy, and even that was easy to get around most days, as much as he respected the older man.

Even if the two of you were just fighting, it was good to have your skin against his again. He'd missed you so much, even if he hadn't been gone for all that long.

You seemed to be focused on him, while he was focused on his thoughts, your movements so rapid that he could hardly track you with his eyes despite the fact that he'd activated his Sharingan just a few minutes ago. You were throwing punches and kicks, kunai and shuriken, and all he could do was doge until he finally saw an opening, in which he sent a flying kick in your direction. It made contact, maybe a little too hard, his foot landing right in the soft skin of your stomach, and _Oh God, he'd sent you flying through the air with that thing._

Kakashi's eyes fell on the little river that was next to your house, surrounded by trees and grass, which he hoped you wouldn't land on-

You fell into the stream at the force of his blow, and he was worried for a moment because he couldn't quite recall if you knew how to swim or not, but you quickly resurfaced from the water and shot him a half-hearted glare, placing your hands on your hips. Like the rest of you, your shirt was soaked in water, sticking to you like a second skin, your perky nipples clearly hard and visible even through the thin t-shirt and unpadded sports bra you were wearing.

"Damn it, Kakashi!" You scolded him, pushing your dripping hair back and shaking your head in disapproval.

Kakashi dropped his cloak, and then his mask and shirt, and finally, his pants. Only in his boxers, the silver-haired man jumped into the river, immediately consumed by the cold water from the shoulders down.

"What, can't stand getting a little wet?"

You swam up to him, lifting your shirt over your head and pulling your shorts away from your body, tossing both into the grass near where you and he had been sparring just a few seconds before.

"Not if you're the one causing it," You laughed, clearly trying to be suggestive as you threw a wink in his direction.

"Fuck," Kakashi hissed, resting his hands on your hips and backing you up against the wall of the river, gently pushing your back into the dirt, mud, and grass. You didn't seem to mind, only jumping up and wrapping your legs around his waist, your arms around his neck. The moment you started to hastily get your bra off, he did the same with your panties, not really caring about how the river carried them away- he could always buy you more. The Jonin paused, shifting his weight so he could hold you with one arm, the rest of your weight supported by your legs around his waist. Upon freeing one of his hands, he used it to drift in between your legs, running his fingers up and down your slit. Your slick juices stood out from the water, hot and smooth and velvety against your pussy. Kakashi buried his face into your shoulder, groaning into the (s/c) skin as he slipped a finger inside of you, immediately following it with a second. "Did you miss me that much, baby girl?"

"Sure did," You answered, voice breathy as he thrust his fingers in and out of you, thumb rubbing at your clit. You tilted your head back, (e/c) eyes half-lidded and unfocused. "But should we be doing this out here?"

"Not like anyone will see us," Kakashi muttered, kissing and nipping at your neck and glancing up at you to gauge your reaction, only able to smirk into your skin when you let out a cute little whimper. "Who cares?"

"N-Not me," Your words were rushed as you yanked his boxers down and allowed them to pull around his knees, taking his half-hard length into one of your soft hands and moving your deft fingers up and down it until it was fully erect. Kakashi slowly withdrew his fingers from you, his heart hammering against his chest as you guided the head of his swollen cock to your entrance, teasing him with how slow you were moving. Becoming impatient, Kakashi went ahead and pushed in, filling you to the hilt and grinning wildly when you moaned loud enough for it to echo in the forest and gripped at his shoulders, digging your nails into his pale skin.

"I missed you, too, y'know," Kakashi groaned into your ear as he stretched your tight heat, pulling out just a bit before pushing right back in and capturing your lips in a passionate, sloppy kiss. "I missed you a ton."

You chuckled and rested your hands on his face, tightening your legs around his waist and brushing your nose against his.

"You're so cute."

"Oh, you think I'm cute, huh?" Kakashi questioned, tilting his head a bit as he began to fuck into you at a steady pace, addicted to the way your soft, spongy walls massaged his hard cock. His spare hand moved again so he could knead your clit between his thumb and pointer finger, relishing in the way your legs twitched at the new stimulation. "I wouldn't use that word to describe me," The silver-haired man started, burying his face back into your neck and smirking against your skin. "But I'm glad you think so."

"Kakashi," You started, movements uncharacteristically desperate as you moved your hips against his. Having sex in the river was honestly weird, as the water was ice cold and had most of his body feeling numb, but your body was so hot in comparison and he just wanted to hold you close for as long as he possibly could. "Kakashi, you're so good... I know you were only gone a week," You murmured, voice weak and shaky from the force of his thrusts. Kakashi was getting into it and it had him struggling to pay attention to your voice, so close to losing himself in the pleasure, but he managed to focus on you nonetheless. "But it really has been too long!" Kakashi was attached to you and he couldn't deny that, so hearing your affirmations that you'd missed him and craved his presence when he was gone sent him over the moon. You'd missed him, too, and he still wasn't sure what you two were, but the more affection-starved part of him had needed that reassurance. "I think I'm-"

Your nails were scratching into his back, and without any further warning, you were cumming around his hard cock, legs and thighs tightening around his waist and squeezing so hard that he was sure you were both going to have bruises- especially if you two continued through the night after this round which you probably would.

It was faster than usual, but Kakashi figured that it was because you were both pent up and sexually frustrated- hell, you'd fucked in the river without any thought, so clearly you'd both had some bottled tension to release. He was close, too, so he continued to thrust into your pliant body for a little longer, careful not to go too hard and overstimulate you since you were probably already oversensitive from having just cum.

Still, it was hard to control himself with you moaning the way you were and your walls fluttering around him, tight, silky, and scorchingly hot in contrast to the river you were standing in.

Finally sent over the edge, Kakashi bit into your shoulder to muffle himself as he emptied himself inside you, staining your insides with his cum. It fell silent- at least until he listened close enough to hear himself. "Fuck..." Realizing that he was still panting, Kakashi rested his forehead against yours and listened to every breath you let out as he tried to steady his own.

You were gorgeous like that, (h/c) locks stuck to your forehead by the light sheen of sweat and splashed water that had gathered there, face nothing but blissed out. Your eyes had fallen shut, lashes fluttering against your cheeks and lips slightly parted.

Everything about you was just _so_ beautiful to him.

Kakashi allowed the both of you to come down from your highs, oddly soothed and relaxed by the closeness. Once you caught your breath, the silver-haired man pulled out, slowly setting you down on your feet, keeping his hands on your waist to steady you.

You blinked up at him, and then you were laughing, tilting your head in that way he'd been so in love with for the past few months.

Wait.

Been in love with...?

Kakashi froze completely as your shoulders shook with your laughter, your eyes squeezed shut. You raised a hand to cover your mouth at the same moment the epiphany that he was in love with you crashed over him like a wave.

You were still laughing, and part of him thought that he could listen to the sound forever.

The other part of him wanted to fucking die because _What the fuck is this shit and why do I feel like this? Where's the off-button? Why am I so stupid? Can I please just drown myself right here?_

"You okay there, handsome?" You asked, leaning in without any warning, and Kakashi was blushing for what must've been the millionth time that day.

"Yeah, yeah... I'm fine," He said, you know, like a liar. "I still need to make dinner for you and I don't want you to catch a cold out here, so... Let's go inside."

You gave him that smile you always did, the one that made his breath catch in his throat.

"What, are you gonna make me walk back after all that?" You teased, batting your eyelashes up at him, and he shook his head, moving to place one arm under the backs of your knees and the other under your back, lifting you into his arms and against his chest.

"Of course not," He scoffed, shaking his head. "Now c'mon."


	17. Chapter 17

Kakashi Hatake practically jolted awake from the wet dream about you that had been plaguing him throughout the night, quickly coming to his senses and realizing that he was fully hard and in your bed.

Great.

It must've been some time between extremely late night and early morning- it was still dark outside, but he couldn't find a clock anywhere.

Kakashi had spent the night with you, made you dinner and took you to bed, and then fallen asleep with you by his side, your naked skin pressed against his since neither of you had bothered with putting clothes back on. Thinking back on the time he'd spent with you, he was sure he understood where that dream had come from...

When the Jonin looked over at you, he could see that you were laying on your side with your back facing him, legs brushing against his, and hogging the blankets- unsurprising, but cute.

"Fuck me..." The silver-haired man complained and brought a hand up to rub the bridge of his nose between his thumb and pointer finger. " _Another_ one of those dreams?"

"Hey, 'Kashi..." Your eyes fluttered open so you could look up at him, gently moving your foot back to brush against one of his, something that you'd told him was called _playing footsie_.

At your greeting, Kakashi reached over and smoothed your hair out of your face, pressing a gentle kiss to the side of your forehead. As always, you looked and felt absolutely ethereal, (s/c) cheeks adorned with heat as the moonlight that poured in the window reflected off of them and lips flushed red from the bruising kisses he'd given them just hours before.

So. He was in love with you and had been for a decent amount of time now- a few months, shortly after he'd started following you, he figured. He'd only figured it out while sleeping with you a couple of weeks prior. And he wasn't really sure how he felt about it, which was the worst part of this entire charade.

Kakashi hadn't really experienced love before and didn't know how to handle it. Part of him wanted the intimacy and affection more than anything else, while the other part of him was terrified of everything that could come from it.

What if you didn't like him back? What if you rejected him? What if you actually did return his feelings? That was somehow scarier, because what if you two started dating and you broke up, or something happened and one of you died? The thought was terrifying. He was sick of getting close to people, only for it to end with them dying, and it had happened so many times in his short lifetime that it was something he'd started to expect.

Kakashi suddenly felt sensitive and a little emotional, but he tried not to let it show on his face as he let out a small sigh.

"Hey," Kakashi finally greeted you back after waiting a few seconds too long, laying on his side to face your back before leaning in and wrapping his arms around you from behind so he could pull you flush against his body. "C'mere."

"Kakashi, you're... Different. What's up with that?"

"Don't wanna talk about it."

"Alright, keep your secrets, then..." You paused and pushed your hips back against his, not even bothering to be subtle as you ground your backside into his cock, bringing it to full hardness. Kakashi let out a small grumble, burying his face into the back of your hair and taking in the sweet smell of your shampoo as you continued. "What got you in the mood?"

"Dreamt about you," Kakashi explained, not wanting to clarify the full details out of embarrassment, much more focused on getting relief, which you didn't seem opposed to based on how you were pushing your hips against his length. " _Again_."

"Again? Why, I'm flattered! If it makes you feel any better, I dream a lot about you, too."

"It's too early for you to be teasing me, sweetheart..." Kakashi scolded you half-heartedly and pulled your knee over his thighs so your legs would be spread, teasing your wet entrance with the head of his cock.

"Kakashi..." You chuckled without any warning, pushing your hips back into his at a languid pace as you reached down to where his hands were resting on your stomach, taking one of them and holding it in both of yours so you could bring it up to his face. ""Mm, you know I've always loved your hands."

"My hands?" He inquired, somewhat baffled by the sudden compliment, but didn't stop what he was doing, still fucking into your pliant body.

"They're rough, but pretty," You held his hand and looked at it like it was a masterpiece, gently pressing a kiss against his knuckles. It was weird, but if he didn't have a better hold on his emotions, he might've cried. _You_ loved _his_ hands, _his_ hands that he'd used to kill people, his hands that he'd failed mission after mission and person after person while using, his hands with scars and bruises and worn knuckles. You looked back at him with one of the most genuine looks he'd ever seen you give, and he wondered just howfar you could get him to fall in love with you without even meaning to. You were going to be the death of him- he was sure of it. "Just like you-"

Kakashi cut you off almost instantly, raising a hand to grab your chin and turn your head just enough for him to be able to kiss you so hard that it felt like the two of you were sucking the air out of each other's lungs. He was still rocking his hips into yours as he prodded at your lips with his tongue, practically prying your mouth open so he could explore the warm, wet cavern. You reciprocated, desperately moved back against him, and moaned into his mouth, and he was just about _gone_. Using the hand that had grabbed your chin, he moved it down and in between your legs so he could part your gossamer petals with his fingers and tease your clit with his thumb, pressing the sensitive button just hard enough to have you jumping in pleasure at the touch.

The Jonin had explored your body enough over the past few months with you to know when you were gonna cum, and the telltale signs were very clearly visible; legs shaking, hands holding onto his even tighter than they were before, your breath leaving from your mouth in weak pants and moans of his name as your velvety walls fluttered and tightened around his dick. Still, even though he knew and had experienced the feeling of you cumming around him numerous times, it was something he considered mindblowing every time it happened, and when it happened during this particular rendezvous, it wasn't any exception. As mindblowing as ever, you let out the loudest moan of the night, freezing in his grasp and tensing up your muscles before you suddenly released all the tension in your body and cried out for him, the tight sensation around his cock that was already there increasing tenfold. Kakashi continued to fuck you through your orgasm, slowing his pace so he wouldn't overstimulate you too much, and after a couple of minutes, he was sure that you'd ridden it out.

It was too late and too early to get up and shower, but Kakashi knew it would probably be unpleasant for you to fall asleep after he'd finished inside you, so he pulled out instead and moved a hand to quickly wrap his fingers around his cock, giving it a few quick tugs in an attempt to get himself off.

Kakashi was cumming seconds later, groaning and burying his face into your neck as you placed your hand over his and moved it up and down to help finish him off. He painted your ass with the opaque liquid, biting into your (s/c) skin to muffle himself. It wasn't hard for him to be consumed by the hot, white pleasure and the afterglow that came with it, but what was most noticeable was your hand withdrawing from his length. Instantly, he tossed his arms back around you to pull you close and watched as you rolled over to grab a couple of tissues and wiping both him and yourself off before throwing them into the trash bin. He kept his arms around your waist throughout it, not wanting to miss your touch.

It was quiet for a few moments, but he figured he should say something, so he broke the silence.

"Sorry for waking you up."

"That was worth it," You sighed, turning around in his arms so you could face him, (e/c) eyes meeting his charcoal ones. You looked tired, but blissed-out nonetheless, (s/c) cheeks stained red and eyes half-lidded as you traced random patterns into the skin of his chest. "No worries, but was it really just a dream that got you so worked up?" You questioned and raised a hand to rest on his face so you could gently stroke your thumb across his jawline. Kakashi leaned into the touch, listening to you talk. "I feel like there's something you're not telling me."

_Yeah, I'm in love with you and it comes out in random, passionate outbursts like the one I just had now._

...Or maybe not. That was a bad way of wording it.

"It's nothing you need to know about, (y/n)," He dismissed your question, wrapping his arms back around you and sinking down so he could bury his face into your soft, warm chest. "Just go back to sleep."

"Will you be here in the morning?" You asked, moving the hand on his face and opting to run your fingers through his silvery hair instead. Sometimes, Kakashi stayed the night with you. Other times, he left before you woke up, going back to his hotel or to pick up groceries or something for you. He never thought you'd noticed it, let alone cared enough to ask about it.

Unsure, the silver-haired man looked up from your chest with a questioning glance.

"Do you want me to be?"

"Yeah..." You whispered, settling into his touch and pressing a kiss to the top of his hair. It was an oddly intimate gesture from you, and Kakashi wondered exactly what it meant. "I do."

"Then there's your answer. I'll be here."

With that, he buried his face back in your chest and allowed his eyes to fall shut, both thankful for the warm embrace you were offering him and completely unaware of what was to come.


	18. Chapter 18

Kakashi Hatake sighed as he leaned back into your living room couch, watching you mindlessly dance around the room with a bottle of wine in your hand. There was some classical music echoing through the room from the record player in the corner, and you seemed to be enjoying it as you took yet another swig from the bottle. 

The past week had apparently been a stressful one for reasons that you refused to tell him, and though that had him worried, he figured that your business was your business and whatever it was probably didn't matter that much if you weren't telling him about it. You'd stopped by the market and bought just about every kind of alcohol known to man, and somehow, you'd lured Kakashi into drinking the assortment that was spread out across your coffee table as well.

Without warning, you stumbled, but caught yourself, a little bit of the wine splashing out of the bottle and onto the wooden floor. 

"Woah, be careful there," Kakashi scolded, noticing that you didn't even bother cleaning up the wine that had spilled, opting to set the bottle on the table before sitting on his lap, pulling his mask down, and pressing a few kisses against his face. "I think you're a bit tipsy."

"Are you happy, Kakashi?"

The question was both sudden and vague, so he wasn't quite sure how to answer it. Uncomfortable and tense, the silver-haired man nervously pulled at the mask that was hanging loosely around his neck.

"What?"

"Like, are you happy with your life right now?"

"...Not necessarily _happy_ , but happier than I've ever really been," He answered, unsure of how else to word it. "That's a little sudden, though. What brings that up?"

"I'm not that happy," Kakashi blinked at that, surprised. You'd been through a lot, he figured, but you seemed like a genuinely happy person, and it wasn't like you to just bust out with such emotional conversation. You usually liked to keep things casual. "And I can tell that you aren't either, and I wanna know why, but you never talk about your life. Do you not trust me, Kakashi?"

"It's not that," Kakashi shook his head, reaching up to play with the ends of your hair and offering a small smile when you leaned into the touch. "It's not that at all. I'm just afraid you wouldn't see me the same way if I told you everything about myself. You probably think I'm fun and maybe a little dangerous, but my life is just so dark and it always has been. I've done lots of things, terrible things... Things that I don't want to drag you into."

"What if I drag myself into them, then?" You challenged and placed a hand on his chest.

Why did this feel so intimate?

"I won't let you. I know you're not innocent by any means, but you could live a normal, happy life- away from me and any other ninjas, just a regular civilian... I'd kill for that normality."

"Have you ever thought that maybe I don't _want_ normal?"

"Sure I have," Kakashi chuckled, shaking his head again. You were anything _but_ normal, and you didn't _want_ normal, but he wanted you to have a normal, happy life. He cared for you. _Loved_ you. "It's obvious and I don't understand why you are the way you are."

"I was a ninja for a bit," You reached for one of the beers that were on the table, cracking it open with shaky hands and taking a small sip before continuing, your words rushed. "A Genin, so I wasn't that great! My dad's older brother was the one who led their little ring until he died, so then my dad took over and made me quit my job so I could pass as a civilian since ninjas were the ones trying to take him and his inferiors down. Messy situation, huh?"

"If you were only a Genin, then how...?"

"I practiced and tried my best to learn even after I quit, but I had to be pretty lowkey about it..." You trailed off, glancing to the side with a look in your eyes that Kakashi couldn't recognize. Your explanation made a lot more sense, though- he figured you couldn't have been completely self-taught in Ninjutsu, but he'd also been curious as to how and why you'd never defended yourself against your father for the short time he'd been staked outside of the mansion you used to live in, watching the arguments between the two of you about the arranged marriage you didn't want that'd always end in your father striking you. Those training grounds at the mansion must've been for the guards rather than for you like he'd initially assumed.

"Hey," Kakashi awkwardly cleared his throat and reached over to rest a comforting hand on your shoulder. "What do you say we slam these bottles down and forget about everything for tonight?"

Suddenly, you perked up, giving him a bright smile that he would think was fake if he didn't know any better. 

"Sounds like a plan!"

Time seemed to fly by after that, the two of you drinking all of the bottles and cans that were on your coffee table until you were plastered out of your minds. Apparently, you were more of a light-weight than Kakashi, who despite being decently drunk, still had his wits about, aware of everything he was saying and doing even if his mind was fuzzy and the room was spinning.

He couldn't remember when the two of you had stood, but you were walking over to him, giggly and redfaced with your hair a complete and utter mess. 

"You good?"

"I love you, Kakashi!" You laughed and threw your arms around Kakashi's neck, completely and utterly plastered as a dopey grin took over your pretty lips. You nearly stumbled, but the Jonin caught you, placing his hands on your hips to steady your shaky body.

And then, your words registered. Honestly, if Kakashi had known in advance that you were going to say that, he definitely would've activated his Sharingan to record the moment, as creepy as it was.

But he knew that you didn't mean that. You were just drunk and emotional, and he was quite possibly the only other person you really had in your life right now. It'd be unfair of him to take advantage of your current state.

"You're wasted," Kakashi managed to get the words out through gritted teeth, still holding you up. "You can't say that."

"But you're so nice to me," You wriggled your way out of his touch, only to practically slam your head against his chest. If he were any less solid, that would've hurt like hell, but he was paying more attention to how you were burying your face in the crook between his neck and shoulder. "And you don't hit me, either."

At that, he froze. You were drunk, like he said, wasted. That made you emotional and it seemed like you had no idea what you were talking about- either that or you were just a blabbermouth drunk, which wouldn't surprise him.

"What? Of course I don't hit you," Shock took him over at first before he realized that oh, you were probably referring to your father. A "Where the fuck did that come from?" managed to fall from in between his lips regardless, but he immediately felt guilty for the way he'd worded it when you flinched under his touch.

"My dad did, but he was really mean!" So you were thinking about your father. Kakashi rested his chin on the top of your head and pulled you as close as possible so you wouldn't be able to see the frown on your face, though you continued to talk despite the fact that your voice was muffled by the skin of his shoulder. "You won't be mean to me, right, Kakashi?"

"...Never," He allowed his eyes to fall shut as he ran a hand over the back of your hair and tightened his arm around your waist. "I'll _never_ be mean to you."

"What about your dad?"

Kakashi froze at that, not expecting to have to talk about Sakumo around you, let alone like this.

"What about him?"

"What's he like?"

"Dead," Kakashi deadpanned, but then cringed at his own delivery, knowing that you'd probably wanted to hear something comforting about his dad being a bad person (something you could relate to) or about his dad being a good person (more accurate, something you could find solace in).

"Oh."

"He was nice, though... A lot nicer than yours," Kakashi paused, wanting to change the subject as soon as he could. He was already somewhat emotional from the conversation the two of you had been having- he didn't really want to think about his dead dad, as it would make things infinitely worse. You had told him more personal things about yourself in the past few hours than you had in the past few months, and he wasn't sure if he could handle more, so he figured it was probably time to make sure you were settled down for the night. "We should get you to bed, sweetheart. I know you wouldn't be telling me these things if you were sober."

With that, he gently lifted you up and over his shoulder, and you didn't object, so he carried you to your bedroom and put you down on your bed. You laid down and pulled the covers over yourself. Kakashi sat by your bedside, not wanting to go to sleep but not wanting to leave you, either. 

"I wanted to tell you those things, y'know?" Your words were slurred, but still coherent, so Kakashi simply sat there and listened. "There's a lot of things I wanna tell you that I never can and it's really frustrating!"

"But you're usually so open," He murmured, running a hand over the top of your hair to smooth it back. You were typically open about personal things like sex, so he'd foolishly assumed that you'd be open about other things too, but after what had just happened, he wondered if your sultry and confident persona was just that- a _persona_ that you used to hide the darker parts of yourself, parts of you that he wanted to get to know.

"No, I'm not," You admitted, a sigh falling from in between as your eyes fluttered shut. "I just act that way to hide."

"You don't ever have to hide from me, love, but we can talk again when you're sober. Good night, (y/n)..." Thankfully, exhaustion seemed to take you over, and you relaxed under his touch, finally falling asleep under the blankets. "Sleep well."


	19. Chapter 19

The next morning, Kakashi was exhausted. He hadn't been able to sleep, mind plagued with thoughts of his father that he tried to ignore and worry for you that he gave into. He'd simply sat at your bedside through the night, trying to sleep to no avail but eventually giving up and waiting there in case you woke up hungover or emotional and needed something.

You managed to sleep through the night, only tossing and turning every hour or so, and when the sun began to rise, Kakashi figured it was time to get up and make you something for breakfast since he wasn't going to be getting a wink of sleep anyway.

So, he was standing in front of your kitchen window, watching as the last traces of the night faded from view. The sky was fully orange, pink, yellow, and light blue as the sun came all the way up. The smell of the blueberry bread he'd put in the oven was prominent in the room- he thought he'd make something sweet enough for you to enjoy, but light enough to not make you puke your guts out. 

It was almost done when you slowly padded into the kitchen, not bothering to hide the sound of your footsteps. The Jonin didn't turn around to face you, simply waiting until you wrapped your arms around his waist from behind and stood on your tip-toes so you could rest your chin on his shoulder and peer out the kitchen window as well.

"Good morning, Kakashi..." You greeted, tone laced with exhaustion. He wasn't wearing a top, so he could feel the material of yours pressed up against his back, and he was able to note that it was different from the one you were wearing last night- your hair was wet, too, and you didn't smell like alcohol anymore, so he figured you must've showered. 

"Oh, (y/n)," Kakashi turned around in your arms, resting both of his hands on the kitchen counter that was now behind him as he looked down at you. You were wearing one of his tank-tops that he'd left there and some shorts, your hair damp and body smelling of the body wash you used. You looked uncharacteristically tired, though, and Kakashi wondered just how hungover you were. "Should you be up? You're probably-"

"Hungover, yes, but I think I'll be fine! I just need to work through it," You cut him off, resting your forehead against his shoulder and taking in a deep breath. Something about the way you were acting made him think that you were not only hungover but also in deep, serious thought- like there was more you hadn't told him. He briefly wondered if you even remembered everything you'd said and done the night before. Part of him hoped you didn't. "Thank you for making breakfast."

Kakashi gently moved your arms away from him so he could grab a couple of pot-holders from one of the kitchen drawers before turning the oven off and opening it to pull the blueberry bread out. After setting the glass pan down on top of the stove and shutting the oven back, he returned the pot-holders to their original place and turned to you with crossed arms. You were clearly deep in thought about something, and though he didn't want to pry too much, he did want to find out what it was. He'd been under the assumption that if you needed to talk about something, you'd tell him- after all, you were usually so open and talkative, but last night, you'd proven him wrong. You were just open about trivial things as a cover for the darker side of you. Like him, you had a lot that you'd rather hide, but he didn't want you to feel as if you had to hide like how he did.

"What's on your mind?"

"I don't remember what happened last night after the drinking," You admitted, oddly nervous as you began to pace around the kitchen, looking at everything in the room except for Kakashi himself. "Did I say anything?"

Kakashi realized that he had two options.

He could tell you the truth, map out every conversation you two had participated in and let you know about every little embarrassing, personal, and traumatizing thing you had told him about.

Or... He could spare you the embarrassment and lie, pretend that he didn't remember or pretend that you didn't say anything at all, but he wasn't sure of the extent that your memory went to and he didn't want you to pick up on the fact that he was lying, so he figured that he'd have to be careful about it. 

"Uh, not really..." Kakashi lied through his teeth, opting to grab a knife from the silverware drawer and cut the bread into even pieces so he wouldn't have to look at you. When he was done, he tossed the knife into the sink so he could wash it later when he did the dishes. "Your speech was so slurred that I couldn't even understand any of it. I'm never letting you drink that much again."

"Oh."

The room went silent, and Kakashi couldn't help but feel uncomfortable. He'd always loved the quiet before, but now that he was so used to you teasing him and trying to maintain some sort of conversation throughout the day, he couldn't stand it- at least not when you were around.

"You're not usually so quiet," Kakashi finally broke, commenting on your silence. You stopped in place and turned to face him with an expression that was equivalent to that of a child who had just been caught with their hand in the cookie jar before dinnertime. "What's wrong?"

"Just hungover-" You started, clearly lying, but Kakashi cut you off and walked over to you so he could rest a hand on your shoulder.

"(y/n)."

"Okay, so I've been thinking about it," You gave him a nervous laugh, though the tone you used revealed that you were trying to stay as casual as you could about whatever you were going to tell him. "I obviously don't really have a job and so there's no stable income. I was living off of some of my dad's money that I took, but well, I think I'm running out-"

"I told the Hokage about you."

Kakashi didn't even think about the sentence before it flew out of his mouth. _Great._

"You what?" You questioned, looking a little fearful, though Kakashi quickly went to reassure you that it was nothing bad.

"He said he'd be okay with me bringing you to The Leaf Village," He explained, remembering the conversation he'd had with The Third Hokage last time he'd been in The Leaf Village. "You aren't your father. My apartment's small, but it has an extra room and you can stay there, maybe find work," He wasn't sure why he was offering- love, he supposed. Kakashi was starting to learn that love was good at making him do a lot of things he wouldn't otherwise have done; follow a girl he didn't know for no reason, hook up with her, get wasted for her, make her food every day and do all of her chores, and now offering her the spare room in his apartment. _God, I'm whipped._ "You know... You usually keep up this playful facade with me, but you don't always have to be so laid back and casual about everything. I don't mind having serious conversations with you."

"I have no idea what you're talking about!" You lied to him like he'd lied to you minutes before, putting on that cheery, flirtatious persona as you grinned and leaned in far enough to press a soft kiss against the skin of his neck. "But seriously, are you sure it wouldn't be a bother?"

"I wouldn't have offered if I found it bothersome," He grumbled, looking down at you. The prospect of you living with him in The Leaf Village was anything _but_ bothersome. He'd be back where he was meant to be, and you'd be there with him. Maybe he'd get to live a normal life with someone he loved, even if he didn't really deserve it. "I miss being at home anyways, but I also don't really want to leave you here. You know what I mean?"

"Yeah, I know what you mean. I'll think about it."

"Good... Then let's eat."


	20. Chapter 20

Kakashi Hatake was surprised when he woke up in the middle of the night, reaching out to feel the spot next to him and expecting to feel your soft warmth, only to feel nothing whatsoever. When he looked over, he was surprised to see you in the middle of the room, fumbling around with something on the ground that he couldn't quite make out. He turned around, covers still on him so he could face your body and observe whatever it was you were doing. 

"(y/n), it's still early. What are you doing up?"

"Packing!"

"...Packing?" The silver-haired man questioned, tilting his head as he sat up in bed, the covers pooling in his lap. He couldn't feel your warmth on the other side of the bed anymore, so he figured you'd been up for a while. It was rather unusual- he didn't like being vulnerable around others, hence why he didn't like sleeping around others all that much, let alone falling asleep before them or waking up after them. But, you'd already made him break a lot of his usual habits, and he supposed this was just another example of that. After all, he didn't particularly mind waking up to the sight of you bending over with nothing but his sweater and a pair of panties covering your (s/c) skin, but what exactly _were_ you doing?

"I'm taking you up on your offer," You explained, tone bright as you stood all the way up. When Kakashi looked at what you had been bending over, blinking the sleep out of his eyes so he could see, there were two travel bags that looked like they had been stuffed to the brim.

"Wait, what?"

"To go back to The Leaf Village," At that, his heart skipped a beat. It had been a couple days since he'd offered, and he'd been happy to give you ample time to think about it, but you'd apparently already made a decision. The Anbu member smiled, trying his best to hide it with the back of his hand. "Move in with you, live together... Right?"

"Of course, I was just... Still waking up."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing at all, baby," Kakashi tossed the covers off of himself and stood up, walking over to where you were in the middle of the room and running a hand over your (h/l) (h/c) locks to smooth them back. "I'm just happy, and... A bit surprised that you actually want to come with," He admitted, averting his gaze for just a moment as he pulled his hands back and shoved them into the pockets of his sweatpants.

"What's so surprising?" You asked, seemingly oblivious, and Kakashi could only laugh. Even if you had your darker sides and an equally as dark past to match those sides, comparing you to himself was like comparing a flower garden lit solely by moonlight in the middle of the night to a pitch dark room with no windows and bloodstained walls. You were beautiful, funny, caring, not nearly as riddled with issues as he was, so the fact that you genuinely wanted to come with him took him by surprise.

"Let's not get into that. I'm just glad you're by my side right now."

"I'm glad to be with you," You clarified, pushing your hands into the pockets of his sweatpants as well to intertwine your fingers with his and give one of his hands a reassuring squeeze. "Kakashi... Don't leave me. Just promise me that you'll let me stay by your side."

"If I didn't know any better, I'd say you've went and gotten attached to me, (y/n)."

"Maybe I have," You admitted, leaning up and pressing a kiss against the side of his jaw, which made a small smirk take over his lips. "But try not to flatter yourself too much..."

"Heh, I won't."

"I'm pretty much packed," You explained, pulling your hands from his and resting them on the sides of his face, running your thumbs over his cheekbones. He only leaned into the touch, focusing on the sound of your voice. Loving you was scary. He couldn't tell you- he didn't know what your feelings were and he could lose you at any moment, but he wanted you more than anything, and as selfish as it was, he wasn't willing to give you up if he had any say in the matter."I got what I need, put it in a couple of bags. I don't need anything else here- for all I care, this damn house can burn."

"Having you with me will be great," Kakashi's smile grew as he spilled some of his more unfiltered thoughts. "You can meet the people I know, stay with me in my apartment. I'll have to get another bed for the spare room, but that's not a problem. There's this ramen stand my sensei always took me to when I was young, so I'll have to take you by there, too... As well as the bookstore."

"Sounds like you have a lot planned."

"Maybe I do. We can leave tomorrow, get out of this place, and I'll get you settled in the village- whatever you want."

"Oh, you spoil me..." You teased and slowly let go of his face so you could cross your arms. Kakashi immediately missed your touch but didn't comment on it. "Maybe you could make me that berry bread in the morning?"

"Don't get ahead of yourself," You gave him a playful frown, and of course, he immediately corrected himself. He didn't mind cooking, baking, or doing really anything else for you that you might or might not have needed, to be honest. "I'm just kidding. I'll make it for you." 

The cold of your cabin was getting to him rather quickly since he wasn't wearing a shirt, so he crawled back into bed, thinking that he could let you do whatever else you wanted to do to prepare for your trip to The Leaf Village, but you only followed him- not that he was complaining. 

His back was facing you, but you were close enough for your legs and feet to brush against his as you began to talk. 

"Kakashi, I..." You were quiet, tone unsure, which was unusual, but Kakashi was gradually beginning to learn that your personality had an array of layers and facets, and this was just one of them that wasn't at your casual and funny surface. "Do you remember what you said the other day?"

"I've been saying a lot of things recently. You'll have to be more specific," He muttered, allowing his dark eyes to fall shut as you scooted closer. 

"You said... That you didn't mind having serious conversations with me."

"Righ. And I meant that. Is there... Is there something you're wanting to talk about?"

"No, not right now..." Your arms caged him in from behind, and you were burying your face in his back, nuzzling into the pale, scarred skin. The Jonin would've shivered at the warm and intimate touch had it not been for the fact that he could hold that reaction back. Sometimes, it seemed like you didn't know how much power you had over him- and you had a _lot_ of power over him, so the more sensible part of him was glad that you weren't fully aware of it... Or, he hoped you weren't. "I was just clarifying."

"Hey," It was weird. Kakashi could understand, though; hiding things with a certain demeanor so the people around you wouldn't worry more than they already did. He figured that you were doing the same to try to avoid him worrying about you, but no matter what you did, he probably always _would_ worry about you, even if he didn't want to. "It's okay. C'mere." 

With that, the silver-haired man held you closer, turning to face you and wrapping his arms tightly around your body so he could pull you into his chest and bury his nose in the top of your (h/c) hair, relaxed by the familiar scent of your shampoo. 

No words were spoken after that, the room filled with silence as you two simply relished in each other's presence. You fell asleep rather quickly, soft snores falling from in between your lips, and Kakashi could only bring himself to smile at the soothing sound.

Briefly, he wondered if you knew just how much he loved you.

And then, he hoped you never found out, because he wanted you to stay by his side, and he was sure that he'd do almost anything to make that happen. 


	21. Chapter 21

Kakashi Hatake was nervous as he laid in bed with you, knowing that you were incredibly close to The Leaf Village. The two of you had left earlier that day, walking through The Land Of Fire until you found a hotel that you felt would be a good stopping spot. Kakashi had booked the room, and you'd both showered before getting in bed, the silver-haired man in his boxers and you in one of his tank-tops and shorts.

For whatever reason, you had sat up and tossed your legs over the side of the bed, pulling your bag towards you to look through it.

"Hey, remember that time I tied you up?"

"When we first met?" Kakashi asked, struggling not to choke on his own words. It was odd that you'd brought it up, and if he was being honest, he'd fantasized about you tying him up in other contexts... Not that he'd really admit that. He wondered if you'd thought about it like that, too. "Yeah, you tied me up in your living room after I got stabbed."

"Ah, good times... I was thinking," You looked over your shoulder, (h/l) (h/c) locks framing your face as perfectly as they always did as you offered him a suggestive wink. "We should do that again."

At that, Kakashi blinked and sat up in the bed, allowing the covers to pool in his lap. You'd said it so casually, too, still digging through your bag. The Jonin felt heat radiate from his cheeks and seep through his body, and as much as he'd thought about it, he was suddenly embarrassed and struggling to speak.

"I'm sorry?"

"Heh," You chuckled, glancing over at him again. Why was he already getting hard just from that? You hadn't even touched him yet. "I meant let me tie you up... Nothing to do with the stabbing part."

"Oh," Kakashi blinked, inching towards you and wrapping his arms around your waist from behind, burying his face into your shoulder. "Fuck, that's actually kinda hot..."

"So?"

"Go for it," Kakashi gave you permission, and you raised your eyebrows.

"Safeword?"

"Uh..." Suddenly aware of the fact that he hadn't done this before, Kakashi paused and looked around, confused as to what sort of word he should choose. He'd read about safewords in Makeout Violence, but he wasn't sure what would be appropriate... His eyes landed on the bag of candy that rested on the hotel nightstand, and he prayed that would be good enough. Hopefully, it wouldn't be too ridiculous. He didn't want you laughing at him or anything... You already had enough dirt on him to tease him with. "Candy."

"Alright, then, say that if it gets to be too much, okay?" You asked, reaching into your bag and finally emerging with a long piece of black cloth. After grabbing it, you turned around in his arms and crawled over him, knees on either side of his hips. Kakashi was left to sit up on his elbows, staring up at you rather helplessly.

"Shit, you were prepared for this, weren't you?" He asked, breathless. You positioned him so he would be fully sat up, grabbing his wrists and pulling them behind his back so you could tie them together. He gave an experimental tug, only to find that the silky black cloth wouldn't give. 

"Maybe," You answered, lifting your hips up just far enough to reach down and yank his boxers off, pulling them down the length of his legs and allowing them to fall onto the bed. You did the same with your shorts, and then your panties, finally slipping your shirt off and tossing it across the room. "Just sit back and let me do all the work."

All he could do was give a weak nod.

After that, were slinking down, briefly kissing the tip of his cock and fondling his balls with one hand. You opened your lips, going down on him past the head, gradually moving further and further down until he was touching the back of your mouth. What you couldn't fit, you wrapped your fingers around to pump in your grip.

Kakashi wanted to reach down and tangle his fingers in your hair, use his grip to guide you up and down on his length, but he couldn't. His breath grew heavy as the thought that _okay, maybe this was just as good as him having control_ crossed his mind. You were sucking him off full force now, a bit of drool pooling out of your mouth and gliding down to the base- sexier than it should've been, really.

His orgasm was starting to build up- or, _had_ been starting to build up, but right when things were getting good, you pulled off and smirked up at him.

"You're evil."

"I know."

Without any further warning, one of your hands was curling around the base of his cock to hold it upright so you could sink onto him. The silver-haired man gasped, nearly jumping at the sudden heat that engulfed him.

"Fuck-" Kakashi moved to raise a hand in an attempt to cover his mouth, only to remember that they were tied behind his back. He was helpless, and a weird part of him was loving it. You were riding him, steadying yourself with your hands on his shoulders and your knees on either side of his thighs, fucking yourself on his cock at a rapid pace. "(y/n)... You're being really unfair right now-"

"Life isn't fair," You chuckled, trying to act smooth, but the Jonin could tell that you were affected, too. Your voice was breathy and bordering a little desperate from how you were grinding yourself down into him and swiveling your hips. Kakashi had already bottomed out inside of you, able to feel his tip touching that spongy spot in the back of your heat, so you continued to lift your hips and drop yourself back down on him to increase the pleasure for both of you. "I definitely can't bring myself to be fair towards you with how pretty your moans are when I'm not, Kakashi..."

Without warning, you stopped completely, simply sitting on his dick, unmoving. You had already riled him up with your voice, edged him with your kisses and with the blowjob, and now you were denying him his orgasm again. Part of him wanted to complain, but then again, he'd basically signed up for it when he'd given you explicit permission to tie him up. He screwed his eyes shut, trying to remain composed.

If he really wanted you to stop, he could use the safeword, but as frustrated as he was, he _didn't_ want you to stop. You were sweet. Intoxicating. Addicting. And he wanted more. You remained still, pussy clutching around him like a vice. The orgasm that had been building began to die down, causing the silver-haired man to let out a whimper at the tears that welled up in his charcoal eyes. He opened them in an attempt to blink the tears away, lashes fluttering against his cheeks.

"God damn it," Kakashi groaned as you clenched down on him again- surely intentional, but you still didn't move your hips. Desperate, he tried to buck his hips up into your pliant body, only for you to put your hands on your waist and push him down on his back, holding him down so he couldn't move. His hands were still behind him, fists digging into his own back and arms going numb. He took a deep breath and rested one of his cheeks on the sheets to get away from the intensity of your heated stare if only for a few seconds so he could breathe. You were going to be the death of him. "You're gonna make me cry."

"Sounds hot," You laughed devilishly before suddenly picking up the pace again, the new speed you set so merciless and fast that Kakashi thought he might pass out. He was overstimulated but he still hadn't even came, frantically trying to chase the orgasm that immediately started building up again. Your thighs were smacking against his with every bounce, slick juices dripping down onto his shaft and balls, and oh God, it was too much. "Is it too much, baby?"

"(y/n)-" Kakashi groaned, screwing his eyes shut again. This time, a couple of tears slipped out of his eyes, and he clenched his fists as his fingers twitched with the urge to move.

"You wanna cum?" You teased him, leaning in and kissing the tears away.

"Yes!"

"Hm... I might consider it, but only if you beg."

"Please-" The Anbu member didn't even hesitate, moaning out loud as he struggled to string enough words together to beg you for what he wanted. "Fuck, _please_ let me cum, I'll do anything you want-!"

Kakashi quickly cut himself off when you came around his cock without warning, wet walls squeezing and contracting around him in an attempt to milk him for everything he had. You lifted your hips just enough to pull off, sitting yourself down on his lap, your heat now resting against one of his muscular thighs, which he could feel your wetness practically dripping onto the taut skin of.

"Okay," You panted, still trying to catch your breath as you wrapped your hands around the base of his cock, applying just enough pressure to have him tumbling over the edge- _finally_. "Kakashi, go ahead..."

Since you gave him permission, he did as you'd told him and finished, heat and pleasure pumping through his veins. Hot, white cum shot out of his length and coated your soft, (s/c) thighs, leaving him spent and breathless.

Eyes wide, Kakashi watched you swipe your fingers up the length of your thighs, gathering his cum on the tips of your fingers and licking it off in a rather seductive manner. If it weren't for the fact that he was already exhausted, that would've got him going again, but he swallowed the temptation that was there and simply continued to take in the sight with his dark eyes. As always, you were gorgeous, but he still couldn't reach out and touch you. Instead, he allowed his body to finally relax, waiting for you to free him from his binds.

"Jesus Christ."

"Here," You reached behind Kakashi to untie his wrists, tossing the cloth off of the bed and moving out of his lap. "I didn't hurt you, did I?"

"No, I'm good..." Not even bothering with a shower or anything else, the Jonin plopped down on the bed, you doing the same as he pulled the covers over the both of you. He didn't really like hotel beds, and he was looking forward to being able to do this at his home, falling asleep with you where he was comfortable- and hopefully, you'd be comfortable and happy there, too. Once he caught his breath, he glanced over at you, a blush taking over his face. "Hold me?"

"Sure."

You turned to lay on your side so you could face Kakashi, wrapping your arms around his body and pulling him into your chest. The silver-haired man allowed you to embrace him, snuggling up to your warmth and entangling his legs with yours.

It was a weird feeling to be held like this.

...But he certainly didn't mind it.

The two of you would probably make it to The Leaf Village sometime tomorrow, and the thought scared Kakashi as much as it excited him. You'd be living with him. The thought felt domestic, even though the arrangement you'd had in that cabin was arguably domestic as well. Maybe this felt scarier because people's eyes would be on him- Guy, Kurenai, Asuma, Tenzou, Hiruzen... You still hadn't picked up on his feelings, but surely, everyone around _him_ would notice that he was acting differently around _you_ and figure it out.

Fuck.

You fell asleep before he did, still holding him tightly as your eyelashes fluttered against your cheeks, soft snores falling from in between your lips. He debated on telling you that he loved you before deciding against it, fearful that you might hear him.

He certainly thought it, though.

_I love you so much, (y/n)._

The thought ran through his mind, and no matter what else he tried to think about, his mind fell back to it, so he simply let it be, your gorgeous face being the last thing that he saw before he fell asleep.


	22. Chapter 22

After a long and strenuous trip, the two of you finally reached Kakashi's apartment, (thankfully) not running into anyone he knew along the way. When Kakashi unlocked the door, allowing both of you to tumble in, he was surprised to hear the sound of scurrying feet against wooden floors in the living room.

Of course, the surprise was instantly replaced with recognition as he registered that it was only his Ninken running towards you. He shut the front door with a sigh and stood with you in the doorway, smiling when Pakkun waddled up to him, calling him by name while the other dogs surrounded you and smelled your shoes and bags.

"Oh, my! Hello, babies," Fortunately, you didn't seem bothered by the Ninken, only sitting down on the ground, putting your bags down for them to inspect as they pleased, and petting all seven of them the best you could with only two hands. 

"Who's this girl?" Akino questioned, rolling over in your lap so you could pet his stomach, which Kakashi found... Weird. Usually, the Ninken didn't let their guards down so easily, but they all seemed smitten with you already, Bull even giving one of your hands a long, slobbery lick. "She gives delightful belly rubs."

"Ah, this is (y/n)..." The silver-haired man paused, his exhaustion finally coming over him. He'd been alert throughout the trip in case anything happened, but nothing had, so now that he was at home and safe, the adrenaline was quickly exiting his body and he found it hard to think. Surely the Ninken would be curious and they lived with him part-time, so Kakashi would have to define your relationship with him to avoid them prying about the matter. You two weren't exactly dating, but you weren't enemies anymore either since your father had been taken care of, and using the word friend felt weird, but he also didn't really want his dogs to know about his sexual rendezvouses, so... Friend would have to work for now. "A friend. She's going to be staying with us from now on, alright?"

"Does that mean less room in your bed? It's already crowded enough!" Bisuke complained but didn't hesitate to rub against your arm to catch your attention since he clearly felt that you were paying too much of it to the other Ninken. You didn't hesitate either, changing gears to scratch behind the tan canine's ears.

"I'll be buying an extra bed for the spare bedroom, and you can always sleep on the couch. You all aren't even here half the time anyway," That much was true. When the Ninken weren't on missions and whatnot, they liked to do other things. Kakashi figured they had lives of their own, even if Kakashi offered his apartment as their home and provided them with most of their food. "So stop acting like I'm victimizing you by merely having a roommate."

"Fine, fine!"

"Let's get out of here for a bit, boys," Pakkun spoke, and with that, all of the dogs followed him, Bull opening the front door with his paw and leaving with the rest. Kakashi shut the door back, turning to you. 

"They're awfully cute."

"You think so? Those are my Ninken, so they're pretty deadly, but... Yeah, I guess they're pretty cute, too," Kakashi picked your bags up off of the floor and walked down the hallway, you trailing not too far behind him. When the two of you reached the spare bedroom, he opened the door, only to cringe upon seeing the state of it. It hadn't been touched in a while- there was only a dresser in the corner and a small chest right next to it that he used to store old personal belongings, and an old, ugly, bright orange beanbag chair of Obito's that he kept in the corner. He'd never been able to get rid of it, but he also didn't want it in the parts of his home that he actually occupied, as looking at the damn thing made memories he couldn't stand to relive come to the front of his mind. "Here's your room. It's not much, but I can get a bed for it and we can decorate however you want."

"Kakashi," You gave him a small chuckle and took your bags from his hands to set them down in the corner. "No offense, but you know I don't care, right? And I can just use your bed! We've been sleeping together for a while anyway."

"Ah, I suppose you're right... Well, this room's here for you if you want, and you can do whatever to it," Deciding that he'd show you the rest of the small apartment, Kakashi turned the light back off and walked out with you following, pointing out the rest of the rooms. "This is the bathroom, and then right here is my room. The one by the entryway was obviously the living room and the kitchen's right behind it. Alright?"

"Okay, got it!" You opened the door to his bedroom and walked in, looking around. Kakashi was a little embarrassed at how bland it was, but you didn't seem to mind. Both of you kicked your shows off and got comfortable before you turned to him again. "Thanks for showing me around."

"Sure thing," Kakashi walked up to you, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you into his body. "You wanna take a nap? The trip was long and I imagine that the next few days are going to be busy, so it'll probably be good for us to rest while we can."

"Sounds good."

You pulled away from him and went over to his bed, throwing yourself onto it and pulling the blankets over yourself, practically rolling around in them. You looked oddly blissed out.

"What's that look for?"

"This is so comfortable," You grinned, kicking your shoes off and onto the floor as you continued to cover yourself in his blankets, bringing them up to your face and allowing your eyes to fall shut. "And it smells like you."

"That's a little weird," Kakashi couldn't help but chuckle, pulling his mask down and crawling into the bed as well, invading your little cocoon of blankets and getting into your space so he could hold you again. 

"I know, but seriously, it's like you sprayed your cologne all over it or something."

"Let's just sleep," Kakashi muttered, burying his face into your shoulder and taking a deep breath in. "When we get up, I can help you unpack your things, and then I'll go get groceries and make dinner."

"Oh, can you take me with you? You could show me around the village."

"That sounds good. Two birds with one stone."

"Sleep well, Kakashi, I..." You paused. Kakashi's heart skipped a beat as he theorized about what your next words could be. 'Kakashi, I love you'? was what he was hoping for, but then again, maybe that was asking for too much. He remained silent and waited for you to finish. "Thank you."

Sighing, Kakashi reached behind you to play with your hair. It wasn't exactly what he had been hoping for, but it still made him feel warm and fuzzy inside- you were always able to make him feel that way with whatever you said and did. 

"Any time."


	23. Chapter 23

A couple days passed. 

Thankfully, your presence hadn't been questioned by anyone yet, but Kakashi knew that he would have to introduce you to his coworkers eventually. He figured he'd at least finish showing you around town first, which is why he was currently sitting down with you at the front counter of Ichiraku, pointing up at the sign above your heads.

"This is Ichiraku, most popular ramen stand in town."

He'd been craving it since he left for the mission to The Cloud Village so long ago, and it'd been a while since the two of you had eaten something that wasn't cooked by Kakashi himself, so there you were. 

As soon as the two of you had gotten comfortable, Teuchi turned to face him, a bright smile on his face. 

"Oh, hey, Kakashi! It's been a while. Who's the pretty lady?"

"Teuchi, this is (y/n), and (y/n), this is Teuchi and his daughter Ayame," Ayame couldn't have been too much older than Naruto, Kakashi assumed. She didn't do much work at the ramen stand yet- for the most part, she just chatted with customers and kept her dad company since she was insistently enthusiastic about being there. "They own the stand."

"Hi, nice to meet you," You grinned in a way that made Kakashi's heart skip a beat, but he tried his best to ignore the feeling, thankful that his mask covered his blush. It was broad daylight, and his skin had always been pale enough for even the slightest flush to show up on, so he wasn't sure how he'd survive around you if he couldn't hide his face.

"Nice to meet you, too! What would you like?"

"Whatever he's having is fine," You pointed a finger in Kakashi's direction, clearly unsure of what you wanted. The silver-haired man couldn't blame you- Ichiraku had a ridiculously large menu and you'd never even been there before.

"The usual, then..." Teuchi nodded and turned around, making some light conversation with Ayame as he began to cook you and Kakashi's food. The Jonin relaxed in the barstool, comfortable with sitting silently with you, the noise of the village streets acting as mindless background noise until-

"Boo."

You had been sitting on his right, but the voice came from his left, so he looked in that direction, only to see that no other than The Third Hokage was sitting right next to him. Kakashi didn't startle easily, but the sudden presence of the older man had definitely made him jump.

"Oh, God," Kakashi smiled a bit under his mask and let out a sigh of relief. "You scared me, Lord Hokage."

"You good there, Kakashi?" You teased, placing a hand on his shoulder and chuckling rather casually. Kakashi could only gulp, his one revealed eye darting between you and Hiruzen as Teuchi placed your bowls in front of you. "I don't mind you falling into my arms, but this context has gotta be at least a little embarrassing for you, no?"

"(y/n)!" Kakashi scolded, shooting a glare in your direction. "Not in front of-"

"I don't mind," Hiruzen laughed and took his hat off before setting it in his lap and clasping his hands together. A soft, knowing smile took over his face. "Young love is so sweet."

"It's not-"

Not even acknowledging what Kakashi was saying, Hiruzen peeked over Kakashi to look at you.

"You're the (y/n) (l/n) he was telling me all about last time he was here, aren't you?"

"Yes, that's me, but Kakashi talked about me?" You asked, which made Kakashi want to slam his head against the counter. Why did he have to go and do that? Hopefully, Hiruzen wouldn't say anything too embarrassing- and hopefully, you wouldn't make it even worse. "What'd he say?"

"Alright, _wow_ , we should change the subject," Kakashi's words were a little rushed, but he tried to ignore that, praying that no one noticed just how nervous he really was. "Lord Third, what are you ordering?"

"Just the spicy chicken ramen."

"I'll get that going for you, sir!" Teuchi called out, and Ayame started to reach for the noodles to boil from where they had probably been prepared that morning. On the occasions that Kakashi had taken morning walks early enough to see it, Teuchi got to the stand hours before sunrise just to make the noodles from scratch. 

"Thank you, Teuchi, Ayame."

"Sure thing!" Teuchi quickly started to cook, having the noodles and the meat seasoned and garnished, as well as into the bowl within minutes. With his usual large grin, Teuchi set the bowl in front of Hiruzen on the counter with chopsticks for all three of them. "And it's on the house!"

"Oh, no, that's not necessary," Before anyone could object, Hiruzen was reaching for his wallet and pulling enough cash to pay for everyone's and leave a generous tip on the tabletop. "And I'll pay for (y/n) and Kakashi's, too. Keep the change."

"Alright, thank you so much! I hope you enjoy!"

"I always do," With that, the three of you began to eat, you and Kakashi still silent and waiting for someone to continue the conversation. "So, Kakashi, how long have you two been together now?"

Kakashi had moved just fast enough to slurp down his ramen and the broth as quickly as possible so too many people couldn't see the bits of his face that were revealed when he pulled his mask down, and he'd been on the last drink of warm broth when he'd registered the words that had come from Hiruzen's mouth, those of which had nearly made him choke. The silver-haired man struggled to catch his breath for a moment, but managed to do so before placing the bowl down and pulling his mask back up.

"Together?" He choked out. "It's not like that."

"Oh, so you just spent months in the middle of The Land Of Fire because you two are great friends, right? Alright. I'm assuming you're going to want to start working again now that you're back?"

"Yes, please," Kakashi answered, thankful that they were changing the subject from his relationship with you. 

"I can arrange that, and (y/n), I heard you're quite talented."

"Kakashi said I was talented?" You beamed, and then looked at Kakashi with a suggestive wiggle of your eyebrows. 

You truly had no shame.

"No, the word he used was _dangerous_ , but I suppose I interpreted it as such."

"In retrospect, that was when our... _Arrangement_ first started, so I didn't know you that well," Kakashi tried to justify himself, an awkward chuckle falling from in between his masked lips. 

"Oh, no, you're right to think I'm dangerous-" You started to brag, but then quickly cut yourself off and rushed to clarify. "Not to the village or anything, of course-!"

"You don't have to explain yourself, but I'm assuming you know Ninjutsu?"

"I do."

"Yeah, she's probably around my strength-level."

"You had perfect timing, then," Hiruzen smiled, quickly finishing his ramen and pushing the bowl forward before picking his hat back up and putting it on his head. "We need a new academy teacher. One of ours quit recently."

"Wait, what? She doesn't even have a rank here."

"Hey! I was a Genin in my village before all the shit with my dad," You reminded Kakashi and shot a glare in his direction. 

"Oh, that's simple, then! If you participate in the next Chunin exam and get promoted to a Chunin, we could transfer you to work here and you could take the academy job. The exam isn't until next year, but it's not that long and you can spend the upcoming months preparing and adjusting to life here."

"Bold of you to assume she's staying here long-term," Kakashi crossed his arms. If he was being honest, he hoped you'd stay there for... Well, as ridiculous as it probably sounded, Kakashi wanted you to stay there forever. "What if she was just visiting?"

"Really? She's just visiting?" Hiruzen gestured to you, ready to go in for the final kill, and that's when Kakashi realized that you were wearing one of the sweatshirts you'd stolen from his closet. "She's wearing your clothes, son."

Things went silent for a good minute before you were standing up, smiling awkwardly and linking your arm with Kakashi's, pulling him off of the barstool. If he was being honest, that probably didn't make things look much better, as The Third Hokage only snickered at the sight. 

"Well, that was good food! Thank you, Teuchi, and you too, Lord Third. I'll see you later."

"Same to you. It's been a pleasure, (y/n)."

With that, the two of you left, and Kakashi couldn't help but notice that you kept your arm linked with his as you walked side by side.

Maybe... Maybe someday he could get away with holding your hand and calling you his, but for now? He was happy with whatever this was. 


	24. Chapter 24

Another week passed.

Things were somewhat normal as Kakashi adjusted to daily life with you and got back to work. Thankfully, he hadn't been sent on any long or strenuous missions since he'd returned to leading his squad, only in charge of patrolling the village for rogues and guarding certain areas during the nighttime. It resulted in him seeing you a little less, but he had to work and he knew it- that was just life. Thanks to what The Third Hokage had said at Ichiraku, Kakashi assumed you'd start working soon as well. 

He had another four hours until his patrol shift started, and you two were taking a stroll to watch the sunset, arm in arm. Thankfully, aside from The Third Hokage, the two of you had managed to avoid everyone he knew due to your crazy schedules. He was aware that he'd have to introduce you to his friends eventually, but he wanted to avoid it for as long as possible. He loved you, and the thought of everyone he was semi-close to picking up on the feelings that you couldn't made him nervous.

"Hey, why don't we go get a drink?" You asked, pointing at the bar you two were about to pass. 

Kakashi cringed at the thought. He didn't like bars. They were often loud, crowded, the lighting hurt his sensitive eye(s), and the strong scent of alcohol mixed with body odor always fucked with his sense of smell- even _with_ the mask on to shield his nose.

"Do we have to?"

"Yes," You reached up and rubbed his shoulder before pulling him along to the bar's front door. "You've seemed tense recently, so maybe it'll loosen you up."

"How considerate of you..." He mumbled, opening the door and holding it. You walked in and he followed shortly after.

If Kakashi was being honest, he'd been expecting to sit at the bar with you for maybe a half-hour. He'd entertain your idea, drink some water while you drank whatever it was you intended on ordering, share some conversation with you... What actually happened turned out much worse, because as soon as you and Kakashi walked into the surprisingly barren bar with warm lighting, his ears were greeted with-

"Kakashi, my eternal rival!" The silver-haired man turned at the sound of the voice of no other than Might Guy, who was sitting in a booth with Kurenai Yuuhi and Asuma Sarutobi. Kakashi struggled to hold back a wince. "Who's the pretty lady?"

You didn't even wait for Kakashi, crossing the bar so you could go over to the booth and sit down next to Guy with a bright smile. All three moved over to make room for you, and probably for Kakashi as well. 

"(y/n), it's nice to meet you," As you introduced yourself, Kakashi moved to sit next to you at the edge of the booth, praying that this wouldn't take too long. "What's your name?"

"I'm Might Guy, but you can call me whatever you want-" Guy cut himself off with a gasp and clasped his hands together. "Wait, are you Kakashi's girlfriend?"

"Oh, no, we're good friends, haha," You answered. Guy took your answer as the truth, even when Kakashi slipped a possessive hand over your upper thigh. 

"I see! You're, um, very pretty," The ravenette blushed- _blushed_ , which was an extremely unusual sight. Kakashi, Asuma, and Kurenai all blinked at that, though you seemed not to notice it- either that or you didn't care. "Where are you from?"

"The Cloud Village."

Kakashi was struggling to calm down. This was making him anxious, but he tried to think positively, something that you had been encouraging him to do. Maybe you'd make friends with his friends, which would be good because logically, Kakashi knew that you needed more friends than just himself.

"So you're a ninja, then!"

"Yes, but I'm still working on some things. I had to take a lot of time off, so I haven't been promoted to Chunin yet, but I'd like to get to that point while I'm here..." What you were saying was kind of a lie, but Kakashi didn't expect you to spill your entire life story to him and a table full of what were basically strangers to you. You remained calm and kept a smile. "And I'd like to think I'm just as talented as any ninja around here."

"I bet you _are_ pretty talented if you're friends with my rival! We'll have to train together sometime."

"I'd like that."

"So, (y/n), what brings you here if you're from The Cloud Village?" Asuma questioned, tilting his head. 

"Ah, she's in between jobs and traveling right now," Kakashi covered for you, and your hand was rested on top of his where it was on your thigh. You gave the back of his palm a gentle tap with your thumb, almost like a wordless thanks.

"Yeah, I'm just taking some time off to explore before getting set up here. It's pretty nice in this village."

"I'm glad to hear you're enjoying your time. If you ever need anything or want someone to hang out with, you're free to join us, even if Kakashi doesn't," Kurenai offered, giving you a sweet smile but then giving Kakashi a bit of a sideways look before glancing at you again. "Unfortunately, he doesn't come around very often. This is the first time we've been able to get him to in months, and that was only because we were so curious about you."

"Well, you two have been walking around the village together for a while now, and you live in the same place..." Asuma explained. He looked away, tapping his fingers against the tabletop. "We assumed you were dating, but you just being good friends makes a lot more sense."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Kakashi spat. Maybe he shouldn't have taken offense to that, but the insecure thoughts that had been knawing at him were screaming that you were way too good for him, so the first conclusion he'd jumped to was that maybe Asuma was implying that. 

"As much as I love you, rival, you aren't really the romantic type!"

"...Fair point."

"How'd you two meet anyway?" Asuma asked, scratching at his beard and raising an eyebrow. "You seem like polar opposites."

"I met her on a mission I had in The Cloud Village. The mission ended, but she landed herself in The Land Of Fire, so we ran into each other again and we started..." Kakashi wasn't sure what to say- clearly, continuing with the response of 'fucking' wasn't the right answer even if it was the honest one, so he went with something more appropriate. "Talking."

"I'm glad you're making friends, Kakashi," Kurenai smiled, and Kakashi saw her hand slide down- probably to hold Asuma's under the table since his hand was down there too. "We were worried about you for a while there."

"You know you don't need to worry about me."

"...Do you think you're gonna leave the Anbu any time soon, rival?" Guy asked, and the rest of the table went silent, everyone tense aside from you- honestly, he was sure that was only because you still didn't have the full picture of his life or how serious his work was yet- either that or you were just unaffected by the sudden tension that filled the room. 

You looked at Kakashi rather questioningly as he sunk into his chair and crossed his arms.

"Why would I?"

"Don't get defensive, Kakashi. We're just worried. We all know how bad the Anbu is for you, and..." Kurenai trailed off and looked to the side. "Sometimes it seems like you're just rushing to your own death. It's like you don't care about yourself anymore."

It was already bad enough that she wasn't wrong, but the worst part was that everyone at the table was silently agreeing with her.

"Doesn't matter. Working for Anbu is a good job and it pays well enough for me to live off of. No matter what field we work in, any of us could die at any moment, and it's not like it's any of you guys' places to judge me, so cut it out," Everyone, including you, was staring at him, eyes wide. Maybe he shouldn't have said that, but maybe he didn't care. It was a touchy subject and he had assumed that they would leave it alone for now, especially since you were there. He wasn't ready to talk about it yet- not with you, not in detail. Feeling trapped and backed into a corner, Kakashi stood up and grabbed you by the arm so he could pull you up from your seat. "C'mon, (y/n). We're leaving."

You went along with him and looped your arm with his as the two of you walked away. Thankfully, all of his all friends were so stunned that none of them rushed to follow the two of you.

"Wasn't that a little harsh, Kakashi?" You asked, struggling to keep up at the fast pace he was walking at down the streets of Konoha, occasionally bumping into people along the way. He slowed down for you and took a few deep breaths to calm himself down.

"You don't know enough about my life to judge that. They'll get over it."

"That friend of yours was really nice," You tried to clear the air by changing the subject as you approached the residential district, but that only made things worse. "What was his name again? Guy? What a cutie. That Kurenai was pretty nice, too... I'm actually super excited to hang out with her. You have some pretty great friends! I always took you for the loner type. "

"Yeah, they're _real_ great."

The lack of enthusiasm in his voice was apparent and he knew it, but he couldn't bring himself to correct that, so he let it be. You two approached his apartment and quickly walked up the steps, your arm still locked with his. 

"You seem frustrated," You muttered, seeming oddly oblivious as Kakashi tried to unlock the door. 

He was struggling to get the key in the hole, jamming it in over and over it again only for it to keep catching, refusing to smoothly slide in and unlock the damn thing. He knew it was because he was angry, too rough, and refusing to take his time with it, but he couldn't help himself. He was pissed. His face was burning red. He yanked his mask down to get a breath of fresh air, not even caring if anyone else who lived in the complex was out of their room and happened to see it.

"That's because I _am_ frustrated," Kakashi grumbled and let out a sharp huff once the door was finally unlocked, tossing the key onto the floor of the entryway and pulling you into the apartment, shutting the door by slamming your back against it and pushing his lips into yours. 

You didn't hesitate, only resting your hands on his face and kissing back, laughing into it. Kakashi wondered if you'd made him jealous intentionally or if you just knew him well enough to be prepared for when he got like this. Either way, he was impressed; you had him cracked, and he was smitten with you.

You broke the kiss and tilted your head back, resting it against the door. 

"Someone's feisty."

"Guy was all over you," Kakashi sighed and buried his face into your neck with a dark chuckle. Sometimes he wished his sense of smell wasn't so good- as much as he loved Guy, he didn't love the scent of Guy's cologne on your (s/c) skin. "Don't tell me you didn't pick up on it."

"He was just being friendly," You said, and Kakashi wasn't sure if you were just naive to Guy's clear interest in you or if you were trying to rile him up even more. 

"You're probably right... Sorry."

"Don't be," You grinned and ruffled his hair, touch soft as always. Kakashi thought he might've been able to spend the rest of his life that way, standing there with his lips brushing your collarbone and your hand in his feathery locks. "I know you're frustrated. Just talk to me about it when you're ready."

Unlike so many people in his life, you weren't pushing him. It was odd to have someone who he felt understood, but it wasn't a bad type of odd. Sinking into your touch, Kakashi sighed and relaxed as he loosely wrapped his arms around your body. You buried your face into his hair and pressed a kiss against the top of his head, and as frustrated as he'd been just minutes before, he felt like he could fall asleep right there.

"Can we just stay like this for a bit?"

"Sure. For as long as you want."

He had work in a few hours. He couldn't stay forever, but he could live in the moment- if only for a little bit... And thankfully, it seemed like you were going to let him. 


	25. Chapter 25

Things calmed down over the next week, and you'd started hanging out with the rest of his friends almost nightly. While it had Kakashi feeling a little lonely, it was nice to know that you were fitting in just fine, and it was also nice when you came home and told him about your night, gushing about how much fun his friends were. Kakashi himself never hung out with Guy, Kurenai and Asuma... He cared about them, sure, but it was easier to hide when he wasn't around people, and his friends always managed to see right through him.

So, he avoided them most of the time.

It was evening now. Kakashi was standing in the bathroom, drying off from the shower he'd just taken. He had work in a couple of hours, just a simple job of patrolling the village with the rest of his squad, so he was getting ready when you suddenly opened the bathroom door and popped your head in.

Kakashi jumped at the sudden noise, which almost made him drop the towel he had been using on his hair, but he didn't. Instead, he set it down on the counter and tightened the other towel that he had wrapped around his waist and tied in a knot to keep it there before turning to face you.

"Weren't you a virgin before you met me?" You asked, which had his eyebrows shooting straight up. 

"Yeah? What ab- Oh, God..." The moment he saw that you had a few of his erotica novels in hand, he was cringing and taking a couple of steps towards you. "I should've hidden those before letting you come here."

"Aw, but why?" You asked though it was clear you knew _exactly_ why. You were just fucking with him, weren't you? "I'm quite enjoying them!"

"Give those back-" Kakashi hissed, reaching for the books, though you only jumped back and grinned, holding them close to your chest.

"Hm..." You hummed, almost as if you were considering returning his books to him, but again, he knew you were just fucking around. "No! I'm reading."

You ran out of the bathroom, and as soon as Kakashi registered the movement, he was fast after you with one hand keeping the towel around his waist. Chasing you down the hallway, he saw you dart into his bedroom and immediately followed you, shutting and locking the door behind you so you couldn't escape unless it was out the window, which honestly wouldn't surprise him. 

"This is so embarrassing," Kakashi paused, feeling rather ridiculous. You were backed up against the wall opposite to the door, still smiling at him as you held the books close to you. The Anbu member took a couple of small steps in your direction, both surprised and embarrassed that he was trying to negotiate with you over the fucking erotica of all things. "C'mon, stop being a brat, (y/n)-"

"I wonder how your friends would feel if they knew about this..."

"Trust me, they know," Kakashi scoffed and rolled his eyes. "I've read those in public before. Everyone knows at this point, (y/n)."

"Oh, so they know about the writings too?"

Kakashi's heart dropped at that, and he thought he felt his soul leave his body when you reached into the pocket of your shorts and pulled out a few pieces of paper that he instantly recognized. 

He didn't write out his feelings very often. He didn't keep a diary, he didn't keep a dream journal, he didn't write to vent, but... Kakashi did have a guilty pleasure. Occasionally, he'd write smut drabbles- just to get those feelings out and use his creativity a bit when he was especially bored. He never had any intention to publish them, but he'd never planned on getting rid of them either, so he'd stuffed the papers in between the papers of some books to put on his bookshelf, and apparently, you'd found them... Then again, he'd told you a million times since you moved in that you were allowed to do basically whatever you wanted in the house, so maybe he had it coming to him.

"Oh my God," Kakashi groaned and covered his face with his hands as you slipped the writings back into your pocket and continued to hold the books.

"Guess you won't mind if I-"

"Give those back."

Everything that happened after that was a blur. Kakashi was chasing after you to get the books, you were somehow avoiding him, he stubbed his toe on the edge of the bed in the process, and when he finally caught up to you, he stumbled and fell. It was sudden, and the fact that he was falling on top of you made it even scarier- especially with the wooden floors. The Anbu member knew that his towel was slipping from his waist and dropping to the floor, but he was more concerned with putting a hand behind your head and catching himself with the spare one without shattering his wrist, both of which he managed to do surprisingly well.

You landed on the ground without any injuries, Kakashi's hand behind your head to keep you from hitting it on the wood. The Jonin had the other hand on one side of your head on the ground and his knees on the outside of your hips. You looked stunned, but not upset, eyes a bit wide and cheeks burning red. Kakashi removed his hand from your head and rested more of his weight on his forearms as he stared down at you.

Now he just felt stupid. He'd spent a good ten minutes chasing you around his room, only to end up falling on top of you without any clothes on. You'd brought out the books and writings just to fuck with him, and it had worked perfectly. 

What he hadn't been expecting was for you to tangle your fingers in his hair and drag him in for a kiss. Of course, he instantly kissed you back, slotting his lips against yours and running his tongue over your bottom lip. The taste of your chapstick was prominent as he tilted his head and drew even closer. His tongue lazily slipped into your mouth to glide against yours as you gently pulled at his silvery locks, which drew a low moan out of him. 

"Did I get you bothered, handsome?" You teased between kisses, your pace growing fervent.

"Bold as always, I see," You didn't relent with your devilish lips, so Kakashi grabbed you by the waist, tossed you over his shoulder, and stood up. The silver-haired man tossed you down on the bed, which earned him a chuckle when you bounced a bit off of the mattress and fell right back on. He crawled on top of you, licking his lips. The books were left abandoned on the floor where you'd dropped them, and the writings were long forgotten in the pocket of your shorts, which would probably be on the floor as well within the next half hour. "Fuck. You know I have work in a couple hours, right?"

"I'll try not to take too long, then..." You swapped your positions without any warning, flipping Kakashi over. The silver-haired man allowed it and sat with his back against the headboard.

"So, you ready to go to work now?"

"Are you kidding me?" Kakashi asked, scoffing as he wrapped an arm around your waist. All he had to do that night was patrol anyways- surely they could get someone to do it if he didn't show up, and he could go into work the following night and make up some bullshit excuse about being sick, but for now, he was focused on you. "Fuck work."

"Fuck work? For someone who was so defensive about it at the bar last week, you seem like you don't care that much now," You teased and trailed a finger up the length of Kakashi's bare chest. "What happened to that?"

"Last week, I was arguing with my friends about why they shouldn't stick their noses in my damn business," He growled into your ear, hands moving to rest on your hips so he could grip them so hard that he was sure there would be bruises the following morning. "Now, it's _you_ here, and I'll be damned if I let my stupid ass job get in the way of _you_ , darling."

"Someone's feisty," You blinked and moved to sit in his lap, knees straddling his hips as your ass settled on his muscular thighs. "But you seem pretty excited about this if-" You stopped to take his cock in one hand, fingers wrapping around the base and applying the smallest amount of pressure, which made Kakashi flinch- you'd already made him hard, and you'd hardly even tried. The silver-haired man let go of your hips to rest his hands on the bed and dig his nails into the sheets. He squeezed his fists so hard that the veins in his muscular arms began to bulge a bit. "If this is anything to tell by... So let's get to it, Kakashi."

You looked at him with a smile, moving your spare hand to smooth his hair out of his face, and his heart skipped a beat. After a few seconds too long, he managed to muster up a response.

"Let's."

And then, his lips were on yours yet again.


	26. Chapter 26

Kakashi Hatake wasn't surprised when he woke up from another nightmare, something filled with blood, gore, and death- or, in other words, the usual. They'd been following him for the past fifteen years, and while they'd changed and evolved since then, he had grown used to them. Admittedly, though, he never really coped. Instead, he'd always made himself get up and do something to distract himself so he didn't have to think about whatever the nightmare had been. He didn't write about it in a diary, didn't talk to anyone, perfect displays of his habit of bottling everything up.

Honestly, a selfish part of him had thought about that when he'd invited you to move in with him. That selfish part of him had thought about how good it would be to have someone around for once, how good it would be to wake up in the middle of the night and have someone he cared about by his side; warm, breathing, loving, a reminder that not everyone around him had to die and that there was finally someone who could act as some sort of comfort.

It was selfish to burden you with his baggage, so he tried not to, but... Sometimes it slipped through the cracks, and that's why Kakashi was panicking when he reached over to pull you in and hold close, only to feel nothing whatsoever.

Even the _sheets_ were cold.

Concerned about the fact that you weren't there, Kakashi immediately stood up and stormed out of the bedroom, the worst possible thoughts plaguing his mind as he made his way through the hallway. Had someone broken in during the night? Were you gone? Dead? Kidnapped? It wouldn't be the first time something like that had happened... Trying to calm down, Kakashi reached the living room and looked over it from his spot in the doorway. 

Relief washed over him when he saw that you were only sleeping on the couch, but he was confused as to why you had left in the first place... Was the bed uncomfortable? Had it gotten too hot? He wasn't sure, but you were shivering now, so he thought he'd wake you up to see if you needed a blanket or anything- plus, he did want to see you after the nightmare he'd had... Maybe you'd make him feel better. You were always good at that, after all. 

Kakashi stopped dead in his tracks for a moment, simply leaning against the doorway of the living room. He had no idea how you'd managed to break down so many of his walls and boundaries in such a short amount of time- about half a year. It seemed like a shorter time than it really was, if he was being honest. There were people he'd known since he was a toddler that he wasn't even half as close to, but...

Had it already been that long since he'd met you? How were you able to get to him so easily? Well... He figured that was what love did to people. The Anbu member had always sworn that it would never happen to him after Obito and Rin, after Minato and Kushina, but here he was, falling for you more and more with every day that passed.

_This is getting quite ridiculous now, isn't it? What happened to me?_

At first, Kakashi had convinced himself that he'd only been in it for the sex. And then, he'd told himself that he got caught up and fallen in love with you along the way, but no.

He'd been in love with you the entire time.

The silver-haired man walked over to the couch, sitting down on the ground and kneeling in front of the furniture so he could look at you up close. 

"(y/n)," Kakashi rested his hand on your shoulder, trying to wake you up. You seemed like you were in a heavy sleep, so he briefly wondered if he should retreat and deal with his feelings by himself when he noticed something.

You were shaking. You began to toss and turn, mumbling something that he couldn't quite hear and. Your eyebrows drew together, and there was a cold sweat forming on your brow as you went tense. Were you... Dreaming? Kakashi wasn't sure if it was a dream or a nightmare. Careful not to startle you, he gently smoothed your hair out of your face, only for you to shoot straight up and move back as far as you could into the couch, putting your hands in front of your face- almost like you were trying to defend yourself.

So, it had been a nightmare after all, because Kakashi _knew_ that you knew he would never give you any reason to have to defend yourself against him. 

"Don't hurt m-" You continued to flinch back, clearly terrified by whatever it was that had happened in your dream, but Kakashi caught your wrists and gently pulled your hands away from your face so he could meet your eyes and look at you.

"(y/n), it's just me. I'm not going to hurt you, alright?"

"Kakashi...?" You looked at him carefully, almost as if you didn't believe it was him kneeling in front of the couch. Without any warning, you threw your arms around his neck and pulled him close to you, resting your chin on the crook between his shoulder and neck. You were sniffling, but he couldn't see your face, so he wasn't sure whether you were crying or not. He hoped you weren't- he'd always been terrible at comforting people when they cried.

"It's okay, deep breaths..." The silver-haired man tried to calm you down, using hand to rest on your lower back so he could pull you close and using the other hand to run over your hair. "I'm right here."

"Why are you in here?" You asked, voice weak as you clutched at his back like your life depended on it. 

"...I just came to check on you," Kakashi lied through his teeth. For a moment, his own problems exited his mind, as he was more concerned about whatever was going on with you. "Woke up to an empty bed and thought I heard something, but it was probably just one of the dogs. What's wrong?"

"Nightmare."

Your answer was short, and it confirmed that he'd been right in his assumption. You'd gone through what he had just minutes before, and though he didn't know exactly what your nightmare had been about, he could empathize. He just didn't know how to put it into words.

"Oh... Do you wanna talk about it?" 

If he was being honest, he thought he already knew; the nightmare had probably been about your father both because that man seemed to be the root of all of your problems and because of how you'd been so quick to jump and flinch away from Kakashi after waking up.

"Not really."

"That's alright," Kakashi murmured, patting your back. "Think you can get back to sleep, or no? I can stay up with you if that's what you need."

"If you take me to bed and stay with me, yeah, I think I can sleep again."

It was weird to see you like this; tired, emotional, uncharacteristically weak. The more time he spent with you, the more he realized just how many layers and facets you had, and the more the facade you kept up began to slip. He found that he didn't mind you when you were genuine, not doing that thing where you used flirting and humor as a weird defense mechanism, but he hated that you only ever let that guard down when you were upset about something because he _hated_ seeing you upset.

"I can do that," Kakashi lifted you up as carefully as he could, one hand on your bottom to hold you up and the other on his back to keep you close to him. The silver-haired man carried you to his bedroom and got back into bed with you still in his arms, surprised when you wriggled out of his hold and moved to lay on your side, looking up at him with a frown.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize for this. I really don't mind it," Kakashi reassured you, turning to face you so he could wrap his arms around your warm body. "If you have a nightmare again, or even if you just want some company, you can wake me up."

"You won't be annoyed if I wake you up for cuddles in the middle of the night?" You asked with a laugh, and he shook his head in response.

"Quite the opposite, actually... You're comfortable."

"Same to you," You snuggled up to Kakashi, a grin taking over your face as you pulled the blankets over the two of you. The Anbu member was just glad to see that you weren't as shaken up as you had been before. "And you're actually a lot warmer than me. This apartment's cold."

"It hasn't been bothering you, has it?"

"Not too much."

"Good. Let me know if you need anything and I'll get it for you."

"You spoil me too much," You giggled and buried his face into his chest. "I love you."

Kakashi's heart stopped, and for a moment, he thought he might've died, but life was never that kind to him. He was still very much alive, and you were still very much waiting for a response, your body growing increasingly tense for whatever reason.

Your tone had been playful, so... Surely it had been a joke. You hadn't meant it, right? Yeah. That's what he told himself. Instead of responding due to his nerves rendering him unable to, he leaned in to press his lips against the top of your hair, relishing in the feel of your (h/l) (h/c) locks brushing against his face. The kiss was soft, chaste, but he hoped it would convey... Well, he hoped it would convey whatever it is he was thinking. He wasn't quite sure. His head was muddled with a trillion thoughts and he couldn't get them together.

Unfortunately, before he could think about anything else, you were fast asleep in his arms. As soon as he realized that, he sighed.

Oh well.

Maybe you two could talk about it again some other time.


	27. Chapter 27

Kakashi Hatake was sitting on the roof of one of the many businesses in Konohagakure, looking down at where you stood talking to no other than Naruto Uzumaki. 

It was an odd sight. No one really talked to Naruto for obvious yet unfortunate reasons, but there you were, talking to the boy like it was nothing. The blonde was rambling to you about something that Kakashi couldn't quite hear from where he was sitting, and he had a bucket of paint held in one of his hands. There was no doubt that he'd been wreaking havoc based on how Kakashi had seen the terrible red paint splattered across the stone faces on the Hokage monument on his way to where you were, the same shade of red that was smudged on Naruto's face and hands. As Naruto talked, you listened rather intently, pulling out one of your handkerchiefs from your pocket to wipe off the paint on his face before tucking the cloth into his open hand.

Kakashi wondered how the two of you had run into each other in the first place. He himself had been waiting for you at home- you'd gone out for drinks with his friends and he hadn't felt like going- but you were taking a while and it had gotten late, so naturally, he had become worried and went out to look for you.

So, there he was, waiting for you to get done with whatever conversation you were having with the Jinchuriki.

A few more minutes passed, and finally, Naruto was running off with a smile, waving you goodbye. He still had the bucket of paint in one hand and your handkerchief in the other when he left. The thought of you standing by yourself in the middle of the street with all of those angry-looking villagers staring at you as if you'd just grown another head for merely interacting with Naruto made him nervous, so Kakashi thought that it was an appropriate time to hop off of the roof he was on and join you on the ground.

Kakashi popped up behind you without much warning and tapped your shoulder. Surprisingly enough, you weren't jump scared by him, only turning to meet his eyes with an expectant look.

"Nice kid, isn't he?" Kakashi questioned, crossing his arms as Naruto turned the corner, now out of view from the both of you. 

"Yeah, he is! But... Where are his parents?" You questioned, tilting your head. "He shouldn't be out doing God knows what with that paint this late at night."

"That's a long story," Kakashi murmured and nervously ran a hand through his hair. You two began to walk in the direction of his apartment together. "He's the Jinchuriki of the Nine-Tails. The Jinchuriki before him was his mother, but the fox was released from her the day she gave birth to him due to some complications. She was married to The Fourth Hokage, and they gave their lives to seal the fox inside of Naruto, so..."

"Oh, but..." You trailed off with a frown, clearly feeling bad for Naruto, which was understandable. Even if you didn't know Naruto and hadn't known his parents like Kakashi had, you hadn't been there to see the attack or be influenced by the other villagers, so you didn't carry the deep hatred for Naruto that so many other of the adults (and even children) in the village did. "He's so cheerful."

"He doesn't know. Everyone is forbidden from telling him about the fox and his parents, including myself, and no one was allowed to take him in or raise him because of clan politics, otherwise, I would've... Lord Fourth was my mentor," Oh. A slip-up. He hadn't meant to mention his ties to Minato-Sensei or his relation to Naruto, so he quickly moved the conversation along before you started asking questions. "They didn't have anyone else who could've taken care of Naruto and not used him for the power of the fox, so he was put into the local orphanage, but got kicked out a year or two back. I think he just acts cheerful for the attention. It's like a mask."

"That's... Really sad. How come they didn't give him to a civilian? They would've been able to raise him neutrally so the political clan aspects would be taken out of the equation, right?"

"Yeah, that would've been the best option, but... If the fox were to break the seal somehow, a mere civilian wouldn't know how to handle it and the civilian sector would be too far from the ninja sector for us to get there in time for damage control if another attack broke out," He explained as you two turned the street corner. "When the fox got loose the first time- It was about six years ago, and it attacked the entire village; destroyed almost everything, killed people, wrecked friends and families and tore them apart. The fox and Naruto are separate, but for whatever reason, everyone thinks that the two are the same just because Naruto is the Jinchuriki, so a huge portion of the village hates him for no good reason and he doesn't really know why."

"Well, I'm not a ninja here yet... Couldn't I be close with him?"

"Be careful with that," Kakashi warned, reaching over and ruffling your hair. You pouted at him, shooting a glare in his direction. "I don't want you getting emotionally invested."

"What's wrong with getting emotionally invested? I feel bad for him. Does he just... Live by himself?"

"Yes," Kakashi wrapped an arm around your waist to pull you a bit closer. He could feel the sadness rolling off of you in waves now from it, and he didn't know how he was supposed to comfort you- especially in the middle of the street. Thankfully, you were drawing closer to his apartment. "Unfortunately, the village has a lot of orphans. There's this one apartment complex not too far from mine that's made especially cheap so that the children and teens who can't stay in the orphanage can afford to stay in it. They usually get some sort of allowance from Lord Hokage to support themselves until they can work."

"So children who aren't even old enough to be ninjas are expected to support themselves without any good authority figures around with just some measly allowance?" You asked with a sharp edge in your tone, quirking an eyebrow.

"...It's more common than you'd think. I've lived by myself since I was the age Naruto is right now, and I was already a ninja by then, so I didn't get an allowance- I was a Genin at five, Chunin at six, Jonin at eleven. Most people who are ninjas, especially Chunin or above, are considered adults- no matter how old they are. If you're old enough to kill people or get killed, you're old enough to live by yourself... I've never liked it, but that's just how things are."

Kakashi gave an awkward shrug, and for a moment, things were awkward. The only noises surrounding the two of you were your own footsteps and the mindless chatter of the other villagers who walked past, but as you reached his apartment complex, you spoke again.

"Things shouldn't be that way," You sighed. It was an uncharacteristically serious conversation to be having with you, but as tense as things were, he found that he didn't mind talking with you seriously. You were compassionate and kind- two qualities that he had fallen in love with. He briefly thought back to when you had told him you loved him, which had only been a couple of nights ago. He had wanted to bring that up, but he hadn't, unsure of what exactly you had meant when you'd said it. "Hopefully someone changes them soon."

You two climbed the stairs and quickly reached his apartment, where you unlocked the front door and walked in before shutting it behind you.

"I hope so, too... But until then, I suppose it wouldn't hurt to help Naruto out when we can," Kakashi sighed as you turned to smile at him. Every day that passed with you by his side, he learned a new thing about you, and honestly? He had no idea that you were capable of being so compassionate until now, and it was nice that he wasn't the only one who was worried about Naruto. "Especially with how excited you seem to do so."

"Thank you," Your smile only grew as you kicked your shoes off. "Now how about dinner?"

"Now you're pushing it," He joked, rolling his eyes. "But sure, I'll make dinner, alright? And when it's done, we can take some over and drop it by Naruto's apartment. Sound good?"

You nodded.

"Sounds great."


	28. Chapter 28

Looking back on it, Kakashi should've known that it was odd when you invited him to Ichiraku. He was usually the one to initiate all of your outings, you were dressed much nicer than usual, your makeup was done, and you seemed much more excitable than usual.

Almost like it was a special occasion, which it was, but you weren't supposed to know about that. You weren't supposed to know that it was his twenty-first birthday, as he'd never told you about it. He hadn't celebrated a birthday since he was fourteen and he didn't plan to start now.

Under the assumption that you were ignorant to the day's meaning to Kakashi, the silver-haired man had gone with you, only to realize that you weren't nearly as ignorant to his birth date as he'd initially thought. 

The first thing that caught Kakashi's eye when you two got there was the 'happy birthday' banner strung above Ichiraku's usual sign first, with the second thing being the cake with a two and one-shaped candle lit and stuck into it to say '21', which was set down on the counter in front of the two empty seats in the middle of all the others.

Kakashi's eyes scanned over those who filled the other seats; Hayate, Tenzou, Guy, Kurenai, Asuma... As much as he loved you and his friends, he knew that this was going to be a long night. Teuchi was at the stand as well, but he wasn't cooking, so Kakashi assumed you or one of his friends had rented out the stand to use as a place to have what he now knew was a surprise birthday party.

He had basically been ambushed, and he should've figured it out beforehand, but he knew there was no complaining about it now.

"Happy birthday, Kakashi!" Everyone including you yelled at the same time, and as much as he appreciated the gesture, his heart dropped to his stomach from the anxiety that filled him. 

"You knew about this?" Kakashi asked and shot you a glare as you pulled him along to sit in one of the two middle chairs with you sitting in the other. His gaze fell on the cake. The flickering flames on the number-shaped candles seemed to taunt him. 

"Well, yeah. Let's get this started; blow out the candles and make a wish!"

Kakashi did as told and blew out the candles, his ridiculous but sincere wish running through his mind.

_I wish for (y/n) to be happy._

When the flames were out, Kurenai was reaching over and taking the candles out, slicing the cake and fixing everyone slices, which were put on the paper plates that sat on the counter of Ichiraku. 

Had they really rented out the stand just for a birthday party for him? Kakashi winced, feeling a little guilty.

"So, what did you wish for?" Asuma asked.

"I can't tell you," He argued, crossing his arms over his chest. "Then the wish won't come true."

"You've never believed in superstitions," Kurenai pointed out, and suddenly, Kakashi was glad that his mask covered up his blush. 

"Maybe I've changed my mind."

There was a pause in which Kakashi reached for a plastic fork and began to pick at the cake. Everyone else began to talk, so he listened to their conversations and took the sudden moment of their attention being drawn away from him to take a bite or two of the cake without them seeing his face. As nice as the lack of attention was, though, it didn't last long, 

"Let's open gifts!" You cheered, which made Kakashi notice the small stack of wrapped gifts sitting on one side of the counter near Hayate.

"Yes, that's a great idea!" Guy cheered and grabbed a thin, square-shaped gift wrapped in green paper, which he dropped in Kakashi's lap. The silver-haired man quickly picked up the present and stared down at it with a curious gaze. "Open my youthful gift first, rival!"

"This is a bit overwhelming," Kakashi sighed, slowly unwrapping Guy's gift and setting the paper on the counter. "But sure, presents."

"I know you're not one for things like this, but we've been trying for the past seven years to get you to celebrate your birthdays with us through other methods and you've always refused," Kurenai tried to rationalize. 

Kakashi couldn't say she was wrong. It was true that his small group of friends had tried to get him to go for dinner or have little celebrations at their homes, but Kakashi had always avoided them, and he figured this was karma. He didn't like celebrating his birthdays. Obito died and his birthdays were never the same after that, but following Rin, and then Minato and Kushina... Things weren't the same anymore and he preferred to let his days blur into each other. 

It was harder for him to cope with the fact that time was passing without the people he loved the most when every special occasion made him think about what he would've been doing if they were there with him instead of sitting alone in his room and crying over a bottle of eighty proof.

Then again, he supposed he wasn't alone at the moment. He had you, he had his friends- all he had to do was open up, but that was easier said than done. 

"Whose idea was this? Guy's?"

"Actually, it was his," Hayate explained, pointing over to Tenzou, who sunk back in his chair and nervously played with the ends of his silky brown locks. "He told Guy about it and they put everything together, figured we could use your girlfriend to lure you here and it worked."

"She's not my girlfriend," The Anbu argued. 

"Hey, Kakashi's girlfriend," Hayate ignored Kakashi in favor of turning to you with a soft smile, biting back a cough. The silver-haired man wondered if his colleague was getting sick again, but ignored it. "What's your name?"

"(y/n), nice to meet you."

"Hayate, nice to meet you, too."

Kakashi tried to brush off how you didn't even object to being called his girlfriend, instead looking down at the gift in his hands; a notebook, or a diary, probably. Definitely an unusual gift from Guy of all people.

"A diary...?" Kakashi questioned, looking at Guy with furrowed eyebrows. "Guy, what is the meaning of this?"

"It's not necessarily a diary, rival! You can do whatever you want with it, maybe write stories or songs, take notes, or a diary if that's what you're thinking. It's always hard to buy gifts for you, so I thought I'd get something practical that you'll actually use!"

"I wonder what inspired that," Kakashi murmured, rolling his eyes as he remembered the last few years' worth of gifts.

"Well, last time I checked, the outfit I got you last year is still sitting in your closet!"

"You mean the atrocious green jumpsuit?" The ravenette's face dropped, which made Kakashi feel guilty immediately. "Wait, no, don't take it like that, it's just that I don't have the body for that sort of thing. It looks alright on you, but on me? Not so much..." Everything went silent for a moment, but he didn't want anyone to comment on the insecurities he had about himself and his body that were shining through with his statement about the jumpsuit, so he decided to change the subject. "Anyways, let's just move on and open the rest."

"Oh, take mine," Tenzou handed his over, but it wasn't wrapped, so Kakashi could see it immediately.

A framed photo of him, Obito, Rin, and Minato- just like the one in his bedroom, except the frame was a lot nicer, and the photo wasn't as worn or torn at the corners, nor was it as faded. Kakashi was lucky that he was so good at concealing his emotions or he might've started crying right there. Blinking, the silver-haired man tenderly ran a thumb over the photo, the notebook from Guy set on the counter in front of him. 

"This..." 

"I asked Guy what size that picture frame in your bedroom was. It was worn last time I saw it and that's been a long time, so I made you a new one..." Tenzou explained, tucking a strand of long hair behind his ear. "I had your old picture in there copied and laminated for this when you were gone on a mission since I have your key, too. Sorry for invading your space and touching your things like that, but I hope you like it."

"I do like it. Thank you."

"We made you a new medical pouch," Kurenai grabbed and held up the small carrier pouch, which looked similar to one that Rin had given him many years ago. He never used it anymore, opting to keep it stowed away in fear that he'd lose or damage it if he used it for its intended purpose. "I know you don't use your old one, but I thought it'd be useful to have something like this on you since the missions you go on are usually so dangerous."

"Thanks, Kurenai. I'll be sure to take care of it."

Kakashi wasn't sure what his friends were going for here. Were they trying to make him have a breakdown? Open up to them? He didn't know.

"Here's mine," Hayate pushed his gift over- it seemed to be a portable backpack filled with items, and Kakashi quickly figured out that it was a portable survival kit. "Like Guy, I tried to go practical with it. I've been on enough missions with you to know that you literally never carry a lighter, bandages, weapons- all the stuff you never have when you need it most."

"Fair point," Tenzou agreed, earning a glare from Kakashi in return. "Don't look at me like that, Senpai, I've _also_ been on enough missions with you to know that you'll use your own chakra to light a campfire with a fire jutsu before you actually remember to carry a lighter like a functioning member of society."

"Ooh, Tenzou's got burns! Get it, burns?" You laughed at your own terrible pun and slung an arm over his shoulder as Hayate took the gifts that were opened and loaded them into one large gift bag, probably for the sake of Kakashi being able to get them home easier. 

"Yes, because we were talking about fire. You're a comedic genius, love."

Yikes. He hadn't meant to slip up and call you that, but he had, and now everyone was staring at him. 

"Oh?" Asuma quirked a brow, which had Kakashi nervously averting his eyes. 

"Shut up, I didn't mean to say that."

"Oh, by the way, your gift from me! Here, love," You teased and gave him what he knew was the full hardback book set of the Makeout series, all of the covers signed by Jiraiya (who he knew was out of town) himself, the stack tied together with a nice little ribbon. 

"...Is this a joke about what happened the other day?" Kakashi asked, still terribly embarrassed about how you had found both his books and his writings.

"Kinda, but I thought you might like it!"

"Well, you thought right," Kakashi shrugged and took the back with the gifts in it to put the books in, careful to make sure that the picture frame and medical pouch were at the top so they wouldn't be crushed. With that, he stood up and looked over all of his friends as an awkward smile came to his face underneath his mask. "Sorry to cut this short, but we should be going home. I have a mission first thing in the morning."

"It was great seeing you, rival!" Guy grinned.

"Happy birthday," Hayate, Kurenai, and Asuma all spoke at the same time, and then laughed at the realization. Meanwhile, Yamato offered him a small smile and a matching wave.

"See you in the morning, Senpai."

You stood and moved by Kakashi's side, and finally, the two of you left, Kakashi carrying the bag of gifts as you walked side by side.

"Kakashi?" You looked over at him, (e/c) eyes soft. He had noticed that while you still had the bold, flirtatious side that he'd fallen in love with, you had also softened up a bit recently, not as defensive as you were before. Kakashi both wondered what had caused the slight change in you and felt guilty for not opening up to you as you had to him. 

"Yeah?"

"How come you didn't tell me your birthday was today?" You questioned. Kakashi wasn't sure if you were hurt that he'd hidden it or just confused. "I only found out because Guy called me to invite me to the surprise party and give me the job of making sure you got there on time."

"So he used you as bait."

"You're avoiding the question," You pointed out.

"Look, I haven't celebrated it in a long time."

"Why's that?"

"I guess I don't like the fact that so many years have passed without some of the people who meant the most to me at one point."

"Kakashi..." You sighed and linked an arm with his, resting your head on his shoulder. "Some things have probably happened in your past to make you think that way, but what's most important is trying to work through things and make new memories with the people you still have."

"Yeah... I guess you're right." 

"This is a good picture," You murmured. "Who are they to you?"

"Oh, right. My teammates. The blonde one was my teacher, The Fourth Hokage, and then the boy next to me was Obito and the girl was Rin."

"...Was?"

Your eyebrows furrowed as worry began to swirl in your eyes. Kakashi had to hold back a wince.

" _Was_ ," He emphasized. "You're right, though. I should try to move on from them and focus on making memories with the friends I still have... With you."

"Am I not included in your group of friends?" You laughed and feigned offense as you placed a hand over your chest. "I'm hurt."

"No, you're..." Kakashi stopped walking for just a moment. You did the same and glanced at him with a curious expression. The Jonin found himself averting your gaze and nervously running a hand through his silvery locks. "Well, you're my friend, but you're a lot more than that, and I think I'm more than that to you, too."

"You're right. Should we go home?"

"Yeah," Kakashi wrapped an arm around your waist, already feeling like he was at home when he looked into your (e/c) eyes, unbeknownst to you. "Let's go home."


	29. Chapter 29

Kakashi regretted a lot of things, but the decision he'd made on the night of his birthday to go home so he could sleep early and go on his Anbu mission the following morning instead of doing the normal adult thing and getting so drunk that he couldn't work the next day was definitely up there on the list of regrets.

The mission itself had been a disaster. They'd been sent to steal a scroll from The Cloud Village, only to be ambushed by Cloud Anbu who outnumbered them by at least double. The enemies had stolen the scroll back from Kakashi, half of his team had been severely injured, and he'd had to use his Chidori on over half of the Cloud ninjas in order for everyone on his side to get out alive- even then, the mission had failed, and it had taken a week to get there, try to steal the scroll, fail, and trudge back to The Leaf Village in shame.

So, when he finally got through the door of his apartment, he had been praying that you would be asleep so he wouldn't have to pretend that everything was fine, but he was never that lucky, and life was never that kind to him. You were sitting on the living room couch when he walked in, reading a book. You set the copy of Makeout Paradise in favor of looking up at the silver-haired man as he took off both masks and dropped them along with his travel bag and sword on the ground. The clatter of everything against the wooden floor echoed for a moment before you perked up to greet him.

"Kakashi, welcome home," As much as he would've loved to greet you in return, when he opened his mouth, he found that he couldn't speak. He caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror across the room and cringed. His hair was crusted in enemy blood, there were dirt and tear tracks down the length of his face, the bags under his eyes were worse than usual, and the charcoal orbs themselves looked nothing less than dead. Not even bothering, Kakashi walked past you and into the bathroom, where he started to slowly undress himself. Surprisingly enough, you followed him, though that didn't change what he was doing. Once he had dropped all of his clothes to the floor and turned the cold shower water on, he walked away from where you were standing in the middle of the bathroom and under the faucet, immediately refreshed by the familiarity of the cold water. It was nice to have his senses shocked after a mission like that- something to remind him he was alive, and following a mission like that, he knew he needed a reminder, which the water proved to be giving him as goosebumps raised on his pale skin from the icy cold. "Kakashi?"

You had pulled the curtain back to peek in, staring at him with a worried expression. All he could bring himself to do for the moment was raise his hand to give you a dismissive wave and utter two words, one lie in the form of; "I'm fine.", something he'd grown used to lying about over the years.

You saw right through him, which was also something he'd grown used to. You didn't even take the time to undress, your concern taking over as you stepped into the shower and took Kakashi into your arms, holding him close. He was putty in your arms the second you touched him. His exhaustion was taking over, and as horrible as he felt for bothering you, he was happy that you were there to catch him when he fell nowadays.

"Are you really fine?" You questioned, one arm around his body and the other raised so you could run your fingers through his damp hair. "I want you to be honest with me."

"No," Kakashi admitted, burying his face into your warm chest and sniffling from the effort it took to not break down crying. "I'm not-"

"It's okay. You don't have to explain it to me."

"Your clothes are gonna get wet," He argued but didn't let go. Instead, he clung to you even tighter, digging his nails into the plush material of your hoodie, which was now soaked in cold water that should've been hitting him.

"I don't care," You sighed and moved the hand in his hair so you could change the water temperature to make it warm. Kakashi didn't object, only looking up from his spot against your chest to stare at you.

"(y/n)... It was so bad," The Jonin choked back a sob and took a deep breath to compose himself before continuing. "The mission failed, Tenzou got his hair chopped off by one of the enemies, I got the shit beat out of me, it took two days to get back, and I'm exhausted. No one on our side died, but I had to kill so many other people to keep that from happening and I'm sick of killing people."

"Why don't you quit?" You asked, almost like you thought it was that easy.

"What?"

"Why don't you quit? Guy brought it up to you before. No one would judge you if you quit, your job sounds horrid and you deserve better than that."

"I can't just quit," He scoffed. "It's my duty to the village to do what I do-"

"Really? What has the village done for you aside from traumatizing you?"

Kakashi opened his mouth to object, to argue, but he found that he couldn't. The village had given his father backlash to the point where he'd killed himself, politics and wars that had resulted in the deaths of his friends, rules that he couldn't get close to the last remaining relative of his dead teacher, a position that traumatized him time and time again. At the same time, though, there were those in the village who hadn't given him those things; the children who were too young to know any better, the civilian families of other ninja who couldn't protect themselves, and now you. Those were the ones he worked for, because even if his job was terrible, it kept the innocents in the village safe, and that was what mattered to him.

"It's done me a lot of damage, but I have my reasons for being loyal."

"You can still be loyal without working in the Anbu. Just get a different job!"

"I'm trying not to shut down on you here or get too defensive, but I don't want to talk about this anymore."

"You don't have to," You sighed and shed the rest of your clothes, uncaring of how they hit the shower floor with a loud splat. At that moment, Kakashi realized that he was scared. He had fallen hard for you and he'd already been aware of that, of the fact that it was too late to change the fact, but what really scared him was how comfortable things were now. He still hadn't dropped the 'L' word, afraid of what would happen if he did, but surely you knew by now. At least, Kakashi hoped you had figured it out and were going along with it since the idea of him having to tell you and you not knowing was absolutely terrifying since he wasn't sure how you would react. "It was only a suggestion."

Kakashi found comfort resting against you, your arms practically holding him up and warm skin pressed flush against his, another reminder that both of you were still alive. You were there and everything was okay.

"I know."

You were moving; shampooing his hair and running your fingers through it to wash out the dried blood, running soap over his body and grabbing a washcloth to gently wipe his face until all of the dirt and grime was gone. It was odd that someone as strong as you could be so tender, but he supposed that was what he had fallen in love with in the first place.

Kakashi nuzzled into your neck as you washed your own hair and body, afraid that if he were to let go, there'd be a risk of you leaving- even if it was an irrational fear to have.

"Let's get you to bed," You spoke, your tone soft.

Kakashi gave a weak nod, so you turned the water off and grabbed a large towel for each of you to dry off with. After that, the two of you were dragging your feet to the bedroom and collapsing in bed, not even bothering with clothes. Normally, Kakashi would bother getting dressed with another person around, and you probably would too if it were anyone else, but he figured that the two of you were just at a point where you were comfortable enough with each other to throw any shred of modesty you might've had out the window.

Kakashi still didn't want to let go of you, so the second you were on the mattress, he was pulling you into him; arms wrapping around you from behind, hands resting on your navel, legs tangling with yours, face buried in your hair so he could breathe in the comforting scent of your shampoo. He wasn't even sure what had gotten into him- normally, he avoided people when he was like this, but now he was being clingy to the point where he thought it was pathetic.

"(y/n)..." Kakashi sighed into the back of your neck, a frown taking over his face. "I'm sorry."

"You don't have anything to be sorry for," You reassured him and pulled the largest blanket on the bed over the two of you before resting your hands on top of his, but he wasn't convinced.

"I'm a disaster."

"And? So am I, and that's okay!"

"Sure, but..." It was true that you had your own emotional issues, and on top of that, you were chaotic, reckless, and had a terrible habit of throwing caution to the wind. You were a disaster, sure, but he enjoyed dealing with you. You were at least fun. He couldn't imagine that his trauma-wrecked state was ever fun to deal with, and sometimes he thought that you'd just done this entire thing with him for fun, got caught up, and gotten in too deep. Sometimes, he thought that maybe you wanted to leave but felt guilty- like you shouldn't. Maybe that was his insecurities taking over and making him doubt whatever your feelings for him were, but he could never be too sure. "I feel like this isn't what you signed up for."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean..." Kakashi gripped your hands tight and pulled you even closer. Now, there was practically no space between where his skin met yours and the blanket. "You probably came here to live a good, normal life, and now you're stuck handling my emotional breakdowns."

"Don't you remember what I told you before we came back here?" You asked, shifting in his arms so you could turn to face him.

"You said you didn't want normal. I remember, but still..."

"I'm not stuck," You took a hand, pulling it away from his and resting it on his face. Your thumb was tenderly stroking his cheekbone within seconds, and he didn't even hesitate to lean into the touch as he would've with anyone else. "Haven't you realized by now that I'm here because I want to be here? I'm not being controlled anymore, I have a new start, I've made friends, and most importantly, there's you. I have almost everything I want at this point and I don't feel stuck at all."

"I'm happy, then," Kakashi gave a lazy grin, hands moving to your hips. The events of his mission still had him in a pretty shitty mood, but at the very least, he could feel his earlier anxieties seeping out of him with every one of your gentle touches. "I know it's crazy, but I think I'm at a point where nothing matters to me more than your happiness."

"I appreciate that, but I also wish you'd care more about your own happiness."

"Well, you make me happy. That's all I need."

Kakashi didn't even think about it- didn't even consider the fact that he was exhausted and needed to rest before he was leaning in to press his lips against yours. You apparently didn't consider it either, because you kissed back and allowed him to maneuver you on the bed however he wished. Within seconds, you were on your knees and arms, ass propped up in the air for him to see in all of its glory. The blankets fell to the floor as Kakashi loomed over you, knees between your legs, hands on your hips pushing you down so he could get you flat on your stomach.

"Kakashi..." You buried your face in your arms before looking back at him, (e/c) eyes and (s/c) skin illuminated by the pale moonlight. For just a second, his mouth went dry and his heart skipped beats. It had been over half a year since he'd met you, months since he'd slept with you for the first time, weeks since he'd brought you back to Konohagakure, but he swore you were still as breathtaking as you had been the first moment he saw you.

"(y/n)," Kakashi started, smoothing a hand over your back and watching the shiver of anticipation that racked your body at his touch. "Fuck, do you even know how amazing you are?"

"Have you seen yourself?" You quipped back.

"Shush."

He activated his left eye without even thinking about it, gaze lingering on your naked backside as he took his half-hard cock into one hand and stroked it, pretending that it was your fingers wrapped around the length rather than his own- not that he'd admit that. Once his dick was fully hard, he tentatively teased your entrance with the swollen head and bit back a groan at the feeling of your slick folds.

"Your eye..." You murmured, still looking back at him. He wondered if it was the first time you'd noticed or if it was just the first time you'd decided to comment on his Sharingan, which he used as a means of recording moments with you more often than he'd like to admit.

"Sorry, it's just-" Kakashi cut himself off as his face burned red at the thought of telling you that he was basically recording the two of you. Then again, he knew he'd have to tell you at some point, and with everything else that had already come out that night, he figured he might as well. "My Sharingan is good at capturing things, and I... Want to remember this. Sorry."

"Don't apologize," You sighed and gently pushed your hips back into his to grind your wet heat against him. A shudder went through Kakashi's body at the sensation, the thrill of it all only multiplied by the praise that followed. "I was just about to say how beautiful you are. You should know how much I love your eyes by now, don't you remember what I said the first time we did this?"

"You said that I have pretty eyes and that must be why I cover them up... To avoid everyone I run into falling in love with me, or something cheesy like that."

"Cheesy? You seemed into it at the time," You rebutted.

"I didn't say I wasn't, love. I've always been into everything about you."

With that, Kakashi was slowly pushing into you, moaning at the feeling of your warmth swallowing every inch of him. Skin pressing into skin, bodies intertwined, Kakashi was flush against you; chest against your back, thighs against your ass, face against the base of your neck. You buried your face into your arms and took in a sharp inhale, the choked back moan that nearly left you making Kakashi smile.

It was cathartic. Though sex between the two of you was normally light-hearted and fun, there were the occasional times that it turned more intense, and this was one of them. Kakashi found himself overwhelmed with feelings. Hearing your heartbeat, your voice, feeling your skin and your hair and how your body molded right into his had him feeling a million times better than he had been. Though his negative emotions from earlier that night certainly wouldn't disappear like that, having you there made them easier to handle.

The silver-haired man started a steady rhythm of push and pull as he dragged his hips back, only to thrust right back into your pliant body. You tensed at the movement, but then relaxed again, so he continued, slow and soft but tender and thorough as the head of his cock bumped against your sweet spot due to the angle he was fucking you at. You snuck a hand down between your legs to toy with your clit and attempted to push your body back into his, your movements somewhat shaky.

He was recording everything with his Sharingan; the clear image of your pleasure-struck eyes peering back at him, your hands scrambling for purchase, his hips smacking against your ass with every thrust. He even tried to commit the sounds of it to memory from the wet slaps to the breathy pants and moans that fell from in between your kiss-bruised lips.

The build-up was slow and natural rather than quick and solely lust-driven, bundles of pleasure gathering inside the two of you until they eventually overflowed. Kakashi knew that your orgasm had washed over you when you clenched the bedsheets and tightened around him with a weak moan of his name, and the mere feeling of you cumming around his cock had him finishing as well, not even bothering with pulling out since you didn't seem to care- hell, you'd only really slept with each other, and he knew you were on birth control, as he was the one who had to remind you to take it every day since you almost always forgot.

Kakashi probably could've stayed like that forever, buried deep inside of you and resting on top of your warm body, but he didn't want to be inconsiderate and crush you with his weight, so he pulled out and plopped back down onto the mattress, allowing you to turn over and lay on your side.

"Kakashi?" You asked and rested your head on his chest as he sunk into the mattress. Now that whatever adrenaline he'd had was gone, his exhaustion was taking over. His muscles were sore, he was tired, and his eyes were falling shut before he could even consider keeping them open, body still hazy and warm with pleasure.

"Yeah?" He mumbled.

"So you recorded that with your eye."

"Yeah."

Honestly, Kakashi had hoped you wouldn't bring up the subject, but again, he was never that lucky and life was never that kind to him.

"Why?"

"It's like I said, I wanted to remember the moment."

"Like there won't be more?" You asked, tossing an arm around his waist and moving a little closer. It wasn't like you to get so serious unless he prompted it, which he hadn't, so he was taken aback. The air in the room seemed to change.

"You never know."

"Stop acting like I'm going to leave," You scolded him with a slight pout. "I won't unless you want me to."

Things were quiet aside from the sound of birds chirping outside as the sun began to rise. Kakashi was glad that he'd been given the next few days off, so hopefully, he could sleep in some- then again, with what he was thinking about saying next, he wondered if it'd be better for him to have some time away from you on the off chance that your reaction wasn't good. Maybe what he was about to say was far too honest, but he was tired, and when he was tired, he had no filter.

"What if I never want you to leave?" Kakashi mumbled, half praying that you couldn't hear him. Surprisingly enough, though, you seemed to perk up at the idea of basically staying with him for as long as he wanted despite how questionable it should've been from your perspective.

"Then I'll never leave! It's as simple as that."

Kakashi blinked at that. You sounded just like everyone else who'd said they wouldn't leave- his father, Obito, Rin, Minato, Kushina... And obviously, that hadn't turned out well for any of them. Kakashi stopped that train of thought the moment he registered it, wanting to be more positive about things, as hard as it was.

"How can you say that so easily? No one in my life lasts that long."

"I'll be an exception to that, then. You just have to trust me."

There was another pause. It seemed too good to be true; having you there with him, loving him, agreeing to stay with him... It was always too good to be true in most aspects of his life when he did catch a break, but the way you were looking at him was so reassuring that he thought he might've started to believe what you were saying. Maybe he needed to open up again.

"Okay," Kakashi sighed and turned to face you fully, pulling you closer so he could bury his face in your chest. You wrapped your arms around him in return with one of your hands soothingly rubbing up and down his bare back. "I'll trust you."


	30. Chapter 30

A day passed. 

You'd gotten a letter from The Third Hokage requesting a meeting the following morning, probably to talk to you about getting registered and taking the Chunin exams there since your situation was so unique and the test was coming up soon. The meeting was only a few hours away, as you had to be up early to go, so you were sleeping in Kakashi's bedroom.

Kakashi, however, hadn't been able to sleep, consumed with his thoughts about you. Instead of bothering you, which he felt he'd been doing too much of recently, he'd slipped out of bed and laid down on the living room couch to write in the diary Guy had given him. 

Thankfully, the little notebook looked a lot like the other ones that lingered around his house; white lined pages and a black cover, similar to his mission book, bounty book, and recipe book, so he could pass it off as anything else. Admitting to writing about his feelings was therapeutic, but he wasn't ready to admit it to anyone- especially when the feelings he was writing about were related to you. 

He'd planned on being alone. However, things were never that easy.

Without any warning whatsoever, your arms were draped over his shoulders from behind, your chin resting on top of his head as you leaned over the back of the couch he was sitting on. Kakashi briefly allowed his eyes to fall shut when your perfume filled his nostrils and your hair ticked his skin.

"What'cha writing about?"

_You._

"Nothing," Kakashi jumped to change the subject as he slammed the notebook shut in an attempt to make sure that you wouldn't see any of what he'd written. "What are you doing in here? You should be sleeping. I didn't wake you up, did I? I know you have to meet up with Lord Third tomorrow..."

"No, I woke up on my own and realized you weren't there, so I got worried," You explained and nuzzled into his hair. "It's fine. You didn't wake me up."

"No need to worry about me," Kakashi murmured and placed a hand over where both of yours were near his chest, stroking his thumb over your knuckles. "There's tea in the kitchen if you want some."

"I'm alright."

Kakashi expected you to go back to bed after that, but you didn't, only continuing to bask in his presence. The silver-haired man thought about why he had been writing about in the first place and leaned back into your touch so he could stare up at you.

He'd thought about what had happened the night before; the failed mission, how you had welcomed him home and put his broken pieces back together, but more importantly, you'd suggested him quitting the Anbu.

As much as he hated to admit it, he'd been considering it since then. He could work a different job and still be loyal and productive for the village- you had a point there. However, while there were many positions he could fill, he feared that there weren't many people who could fill his current position, and he didn't want to be an inconvenience. Maybe he'd quit when he was older, though. He figured age would catch up to him eventually- that way he'd at least have something of an excuse for resigning.

"I thought about what you said," Kakashi said.

"About what I said?"

"About quitting the Anbu. I don't think I'm going to do it for now, but I'll make an effort to... Cope better. I don't want to bother you with my shit."

"Kakashi!" You started to scold him and pulled away from his touch so you could stand up straight and cross your arms. Kakashi turned around where he sat to look at you with raised eyebrows. "You're missing the point of everything I said last night."

"What do you mean?"

"I'm not _bothered by your shit_ , as you put it," You emphasized, quoting that part from him and shooting a glare in his direction. "I'm worried about you. I just want you to be happy."

"You've been oddly serious lately," The Jonin pointed out. 

You put your hands on your hips and increased the intensity of your glare in response.

"I'm serious when it comes to you. Is that a problem?"

"Not really, I guess," Kakashi let out a huff. It seemed like you were seriously upset, which he supposed was reasonable. If you were in a career where you were constantly traumatized and didn't seem to care about taking care of yourself, he'd be pretty pissed, too. "I'll try to be better about that for you."

"I want you to do it for _yourself_ , love."

"...I'll try."

"Did you end up eating dinner?" You asked.

"Uh, no, I didn't get around to it earlier. You were busy with Kurenai and I forget to eat sometimes when you aren't there to remind me," Kakashi admitted, face burning bright red. Since he had been at home for the night and obviously wasn't expecting anyone, he wasn't wearing his mask, so the vermillion hue that painted his cheeks was on full display. "You're in the mood for a midnight snack, aren't you?"

"Yes, I am!" You confirmed with a laugh and walked around to the front of the couch so you could grab him by the hand and pull him up. Kakashi blinked at how strong you were, pulling him up like he was weightless, practically dragging him into the kitchen. "I know it's not that nutritious, but how about some candy for dinner?" 

You didn't even wait for an answer, turning to one of the cabinets and opening it. You dug out a bag of chocolates before turning around and offering him one. He was never one for sweets, but he took one of the truffles and popped it into his mouth as he struggled to hold back a smile.

"You're cute, you know," The silver-haired man smiled anyways despite his earlier attempts not to as he chewed and swallowed the sweet treats. He hadn't been a big fan of candy before, but you liked it, so he'd started to as well. "But candy for dinner can not become a regular thing because I absolutely refuse to let you go back to living off of empty junk food like you were back when you were living by yourself... While we're at it, you need to get to bed. You have a meeting in the morning."

"You're such a nag, Kakashi."

"You love it, though."

"I never said I didn't," You argued, eating one of the chocolates and closing the bag, which you set on the counter. "In fact, maybe I love everything about you."

Kakashi wanted to respond- he really did, but he found himself freezing where he stood, unable to speak. You smiled at him, (e/c) eyes filled with something he didn't recognize. Before he could even respond, your hand was brushing over his shoulder, and then you were walking out of the kitchen, probably to go to bed.

Once you were all the way out of the room, Kakashi sighed and shook his head.

If only he had some way of knowing you were truly thinking... The Anbu member debated on going to his bedroom where you usually slept to talk to you, to ask what you'd meant by your words, but he ultimately decided against it. You needed your sleep and he didn't want to stress you out.

So, he decided to quietly trudge back into the bedroom and lay by your side instead, completely unaware that he'd left his diary open on the living room couch...


	31. Chapter 31

Kakashi should've known that leaving his diary out was a huge mistake, but of course, all common sense seemed to leave him when you were around. So, he shouldn't have been surprised when you waltzed into his bedroom one day and mentioned it, but he still was.

It had been a late night. You mentioned that you were going to bake something and he had prayed that you were responsible enough to do so without burning the apartment complex down, so instead of supervising since you were a functional adult, he sat on the bed in his bedroom with his back against the headboard and a book in his lap. His mask hung loosely around his neck since he'd pulled it down upon getting home, and he was reading Makeout Paradise- you already knew what his face looked like, and you knew about the books, so he figured there was no point in trying to hide either of those things when it was just the two of you. 

While he expected you to be in the kitchen for at least an hour, he heard your footsteps in the hallway and set his book to the side, then looked up when the steps stopped. You were now standing in the doorway, a satisfied smirk on your pretty lips. You were wearing what had become your usual pajamas; one of his t-shirts and a pair of shorts. 

"So, you love me, huh?" 

"...Is it that obvious?" Kakashi asked, feeling his heart drop to the bottom of his stomach. You knew, somehow you knew and there was no going back. He wanted to act calm, cool, and collected, but as soon as the question left his mouth, he was practically trembling where he sat and staring down at his shaking hands.

Sure, you acted as if you loved him, and you'd said it to him once, but he'd assumed you were joking back then. The Jonin didn't know what to feel or what to say, nor did he know what your feelings were. He hadn't been experienced in sex, romance, or any of the new things you had introduced him to- not before he'd met you, so he couldn't confidently interpret the way you acted and talked to him to determine whether or not you felt the same way he did. 

Very rarely was he perplexed about anything, but there he was, sitting on the bed rather helplessly and waiting for your response.

"Not really, but I read your diary," Kakashi blinked at that. You'd not only discovered his secret, but you'd invaded his privacy to do so. Should he be angry, scared, or sad? He wasn't sure, and he couldn't even bring himself to look up at you. "Thought it was your recipe book at first and grabbed it because I was gonna make that blueberry bread, flicked it open and the first sentence on the page was talking about how you weren't sure of what to do about your feelings for me and... How in love with me you are."

Oh. That made sense. The two notebooks did look almost identical. It was a relief to know that it had been a mistake rather than you purposefully going through his diary.

"My recipe book?"

"The cover is the same color as-"

"Yeah, I know. Maybe I should've labeled them..."

You sighed, then offered a small smile. Kakashi held his breath when you walked over to him, slow and cautious before leaning down and pressing a kiss against the top of his head. Then, you ruffled his hair, your smile growing.

"I love you too, y'know. I have the whole time," You admitted as you smoothed Kakashi's hair back. The silver-haired man let out a breath and placed a hand over his chest at the same moment the wave of relief crashed over him. "I said it to you that one night when you woke me up from my nightmare and took me back to bed, remember? All you did was kiss my forehead and go to sleep, so I assumed you either didn't return the feelings or just weren't ready yet..."

Kakashi thought you might've killed him and brought him back to life- telling him about the diary before telling him that you returned the feelings and dragging it out for what felt like a lifetime, but God, he was happy. Months of build-up, pain and love and discovery, all finally coming to a head- at this. He'd been scared of love before, but he was starting to think that maybe you'd changed him, and that maybe you were going to be the one to give him the happy ending he'd always wanted.

"Oh, no, I just thought you were joking, so I was too scared to say anything back..." He confessed, tone laced with an awkward edge. Part of him wondered just how many months of pining he could've saved if he'd confessed earlier on in your relationship, but then again, he was also glad things had turned out this way. "Well, then. I guess I shouldn't have been so worried about it."

"Probably not," You laughed. "You always overthink and worry about things too much. You're not as good at hiding it as you think you are."

There was a pause in which Kakashi took an opportunity to truly admire you; (e/c) eyes staring down at him so lovingly, (h/l) (h/c) hair framing your face so perfectly, soft lips curling up into a sweet smile. The silver-haired man didn't even think about it before grabbing you by the hips and pulling you into his lap. You immediately went along with it and straddled his thighs, placing your hands on his shoulder with a grin. 

"I love you," Kakashi pressed his lips against yours. You instantly kissed back and threaded your fingers through his hair, pulling gently, which had him moaning into your mouth. You broke the kiss and peered down at him with half-lidded eyes and flushed cheeks. "Fuck, I love you so much. I can't even believe it... At first, I thought it was a terrible idea to follow you the way I was back in your old village- Hell, I cursed myself regularly for it, but now I'm so glad I did. It's like you changed everything for me." 

"It's funny that you're the one saying that, handsome," You chuckled and placed a hand on either side of his face, thumbs stroking over his cheekbones. "It feels like you're the one who changed everything for me." 

He kissed you again, and _again_ , _and again_. He was breathless, his lips were going numb, but he didn't plan on stopping- no, he wanted to go further. His hands were slipping up your shirt and moving to hold your breasts, toying with the supple mounds as he rocked his hips up into yours. 

"Let me make love to you, darling," Kakashi whispered into your ear. Briefly, his kiss-bruised lips brushed against the lobe.

"Kakashi, I-" You cut yourself off and blushed as you covered your face with your hands. A nervous chuckle fell from in between your lips. 

That was unusual. On a normal day, you'd take the lead without so much as a thought, bold and confident, but now things seemed a bit different- not that he minded. What he loved most about you was your different layers and facets and various sides you had to your intricate personality. With a smirk, the Anbu member withdrew his hands from underneath your shirt, gently grasped your wrists, and pulled your hands away from your face so he could look you in the eye.

"You're not usually so bashful."

"It's different... Knowing that you return my feelings, I'm not sure how to go about things."

"You don't have to change anything just because we confessed," He muttered as he dropped your wrists in favor of holding your hands and locking your fingers with his. "It's simple- just act like normal, except a little more open with things since we... Well, you know."

"It's a bit scary." You gave a nervous laugh before continuing. "Casual sex is one thing, but I hadn't been in love before you."

"Wait, really? I assumed you had experience in that sort of thing..."

"Not really, I just went with the flow and hoped you wouldn't pick up on it."

"Oh, well... I guess I'm the same, so there's nothing to be scared of. We'll figure it out together, okay?" He asked, squeezing your hand reassuringly. 

You nodded in response and let out a small sigh of relief. 

"Okay."

"Hey," Kakashi spoke, charcoal eyes pouring into your (e/c) ones. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

And then, his lips were on yours yet again.


	32. Chapter 32

Years passed.

You'd managed to get promoted to Chunin, and then Jonin, which was followed by you landing a job working as a nurse at The Ninja Academy, and Kakashi was still in the Anbu. Due to his career, while the two of you had gotten married, it had been on the down-low; no one was invited to the wedding, only your closest friends really knew, and both of you wore your wedding rings on necklaces that were tucked into your clothes instead of on your wedding fingers- both to avoid losing the rings on missions and to avoid anyone making the connection. Kakashi figured you two could be more open about it when he quit the Anbu, but as life would have it, The Third Hokage had discharged him before he could even quit.

So, he was on his way to tell you about it, and to bring you lunch since you forgot to bring it for yourself most of the time. 

It was mid-afternoon, so you were still at work. He needed to see you anyways- he'd just returned a mission where he'd pulled a muscle in his already-bruised shoulder, only to get laid off and be informed that he'd be teaching a group of Genin that year, which he found utterly terrifying, though that was something he could dwell on later. 

The silver-haired man showed up at the window of the nurse's office, which was at the back of The Ninja Academy. You never bothered with the curtains or blinds, so it was easy to see you sitting down in your roller chair and spinning around rather aimlessly as you tried to balance a pen on your nose, only for it to fall off and clatter to the floor. He laughed at the sight.

Even after all these years, you were still as dorky as ever.

Kakashi tapped on the window, which didn't scare you, as you'd gotten good at sensing his presence. You instantly smiled and walked over to the window to open it. As soon as the window was fully opened, he threw a leg over the windowsill and climbed in, then shut it back behind him. Thankfully, you were on the ground level... He thought he might've been too tired to scale a story level building at the moment.

Him visiting you at work wasn't abnormal, so you simply took the bagged lunch from his hands and set it down on one of the counters in the nurse's office. 

"So, I have news. I got discharged from the Anbu," Kakashi muttered. 

You gasped and turned to face him with wide eyes and furrowed eyebrows, clearly confused. He hadn't been willing to quit the Anbu on his own, but you, Guy, Kurenai, and Asuma had been pushing for it for a while, so he wouldn't be surprised if they'd managed to pull some strings.

"What!?" You spat.

"You heard me-" He was about to reiterate, but before he could, the door to the office opened, revealing no other than Iruka and a bruised and bloodied Naruto. Kakashi wasn't really supposed to be at your work, so he felt a bit awkward and all he could really do was turn around and wave to the two. "Oh, hello."

"(y/n)-Sensei!" Naruto cheered, grinning even though he had a black eye and a bleeding nose.

Kakashi almost smiled under his mask as Naruto ran up to you and gave you a hug, which you returned. From what he knew, you'd formed a close relationship with the Jinchuriki; taking him dinner most nights so he would eat, walking him home from school, helping him with training, healing him when he got injured, arguing and even occasionally fighting with villagers who tried to start something with him just because he had the Nine-Tails sealed within him. It seemed like things had gone almost a little too far, like you had gotten too attached, but... Kakashi couldn't fault you. Even if he had his issues, Naruto was a good kid, and he deserved to be loved and cherished, even if you weren't his family. Kakashi was tempted to do what you had done, but he feared that The Third Hokage might chew him out for it, so he didn't. 

The Anbu- or, _former_ Anbu's thoughts- were cut off by Iruka, who was still standing in the doorway.

"He went and got into another fight with Sasuke. Can I leave him here with you?" The brunette asked.

"Sure, Iruka," You let go of Naruto so you could give Iruka a dismissive wave and a nod. "Go ahead and get back to your class before they cause too much trouble."

"Thank you, (y/n)."

With that, the Chunin left the room and shut the door on his way out, leaving Kakashi alone with you and Naruto. The blond hopped onto the metal table and sat down, kicking his small legs back and forth as you gathered enough cotton balls, water, and alcohol to clean up the blood around his nose and disinfect the scratches on his hands and arms. 

"Who's that?" Naruto questioned and pointed at Kakashi. The silver-haired man, who had been standing rather awkwardly in the middle of the room, felt even more awkward.

"Naruto, that's is my husband, Kakashi," You explained as you finished cleaning the boy up and began to use your medical Ninjutsu to heal him the best you could. Apparently, fights with Sasuke where Naruto ended up wrecked beyond belief and being dragged by Iruka into your office were common nowadays from what you'd said.

After registering what you'd said, Naruto looked at him with a shocked expression, and then back at you again. 

Kakashi was surprised that you'd told Naruto of all people about the fact that the two of you were married, but then again, he wasn't in the Anbu anymore- he had a chance of living a semi-normal life now, so making your marriage more well-known wasn't a bad idea by any means.

"You're married!?"

"Yes, but the fact that you went and got into another fight with Sasuke despite me and Iruka getting onto the both of you the last few times is more important, sweetie," You huffed, and then looked over at the other Jonin. "Looks like you're gonna have to wait, Kakashi."

"I think I'll live."

"Does he work here?" The blond pointed at him again.

Naruto seemed to have calmed down. Whether it was the adrenaline from his scrap fading or the dejection that came from you scolding him about something instead of praising him like you did with most other things that he did, Kakashi wasn't quite sure.

"No," You answered.

"Then what's he doing here?"

"He just came to see me and bring me lunch."

"How come you never told me about him?"

There was an edge of hurt to Naruto's voice. Kakashi supposed he could understand that- You'd told him everything that Naruto had told you, and it seemed like Naruto had told you a lot of personal things. Even if the reasons were valid from you and Kakashi's perspective, the kid was probably upset that you'd hidden such an important part of your life from him.

"I didn't think it mattered," You sighed and put bandages over the cuts that needed them. You were usually much faster when it came to tending to people's wounds, but Kakashi figured you were dragging out the process so you could talk to Naruto a little longer. "Are you free tonight?"

"I'm a bit busy, but I think I can make time!" That was a lie. You and Kakashi both knew that Naruto had nothing to do before and after school aside from sit at home and/or run around the village pranking people. You never wanted to make Naruto feel bad about it, though, and you wanted him to know that you valued him and his time, so you always talked to him as if you thought he might've had other plans- distant family or maybe friends to hang out with, training to do, even if he never actually had any of that going on. "What's up?"

"You should come over for dinner," That was new. Most nights, you would go over to Naruto's alone and cook something for him, make sure his apartment was in order, help him with homework- Kakashi was never included in that mix. The thought of it had him blinking, a bit shocked. "Kakashi's a pretty good cook, y'know."

"Really!?" 

Naruto's eyes lit up, and this time, Kakashi couldn't help the smile that took over his face under his mask as he crossed his arms over his chest. 

"Yeah," You grabbed your pen and a piece of paper to scribble something down on it before handing it to Naruto, along with a piece of candy from the jar that sat on your cabinet. "Here's my address, and that chocolate you like. Show up at seven or so tonight and we'll have food for you, maybe we could work on your studies. Now get back to class, okay? Have a good day and try not to get into any more fights!"

"Okay!" Naruto stood up, waving excitedly at you, and then at Kakashi. "See you tonight!"

With that, he ran out of the room, and you and Kakashi were alone again. 

"Do you have to baby him so much?" Kakashi laughed and took a step towards you so he could wrap his arms around your waist and pull you in. 

"Obviously, yes. Think you can make something for him tonight or should I do it?"

"You've been at work all day, of course I can do that, but-"

"No buts," You cut him off by holding a finger up against his masked lips. "I don't give a fuck about what The Third Hokage told you, that boy doesn't have anyone else and I'll be damned if I don't try to take care of him the best I can."

"I know," Kakashi rested a hand on your cheek. You took your finger off of his lips in favor of pulling his mask down. "I was just about to say that you should try to get some rest. I don't want you worrying yourself into exhaustion."

"Oh. Well, I'll be fine, just get home and rest for a bit. You can tell me about your news after Naruto leaves tonight- it'd be better if we talk about it while we're alone and relaxed."

"Don't I get some candy too? I feel like chopped liver, (y/n)."

"Heh, here," You rolled your eyes and grabbed a piece of chocolate from the jar, unwrapping it and pushing it between his parted lips. "Happy?"

"Very," Kakashi ate the sweet treat. The second he swallowed it, he was leaning forward to press a soft kiss against your lips, which you returned. "I'll see you at home, love you."

He pulled his mask back up and let you go, so you returned to sitting in your chair and slowly unpacking the lunch he'd brought for you.

"I love you, too. Be safe!"

"I will."

With that, he was exiting through the window and heading home, already mentally preparing the ramen recipe he'd use for dinner as the taste of sweet candy lingered on his tongue.

Maybe you needed to get one of those candy jars for your house, too... 


End file.
